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Command Line Life Partner Wanted

Posted by CmdrTaco on Mon Jan 21, 2008 11:19 AM
from the cli-user-seeks-same dept.
GUI Software It's funny. Laugh. Linux
emj writes "Craiglist offers an interesting approach to finding a life partner , summmary: "There is a sad truth to the world today. I am part of a dying breed of people known as "shell users." ... Because there are fewer and fewer of us, I must help keep our lineage alive. I am looking for someone to help me do this. I need a woman (obviously) who is willing to raise a child with me in the method of Unix."."
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Submission: Command Line life partner wanted by emj (15659)
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  • hmmm... (Score:5, Funny)

    by hbean (144582) * on Monday January 21 2008, @11:21AM (#22127274)
    grep -i 'single white female' /usr2/home/women/*

  • Unichs? (Score:5, Funny)

    by Wordsmith (183749) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:21AM (#22127276) Homepage
    Don't be silly. Unichs can't have children.

  • One things for sure (Score:5, Funny)

    by clubhi (1086577) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:22AM (#22127286)
    This kid will get all the chicks.

  • "dying breed"? (Score:5, Insightful)

    by neiko (846668) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:24AM (#22127312)
    I'm not sure I agree that shell users are a dying breed. Being a young developer (25yo) I and most, if not all, my co-workers are using a shell to develop and run unit debug/trace in. I think the amount of computer users in general has gone up so merely the ratio of shell/gui users has gone down.

      • Re:"dying breed"? (Score:5, Insightful)

        by rk (6314) on Monday January 21 2008, @12:16PM (#22128022) Journal

        And who-ever it was who thought tying computationally costly operations to fancy clock cycle consuming progress bars was a good idea should be shot.

        Probably someone who was tired of the computational expense of having something run halfway through umpteen times, only to have their users kill the program, because it was "hung". If you've got a progress bar that's consuming enough CPU that it is having an significantly adverse impact on an application's performance, it's either coded horribly wrong, or you're at the very limit of your hardware's maximum capability, and perhaps you should really consider upgrading.

        FWIW, I'm a dyed-in-the-wool shell scripting, C, Python and Perl programming command-line Unix elitist snob who uses X11 (or OS X for that matter) as little more than a fancy terminal manager, and have been for almost 20 years. But that doesn't mean I don't understand basic human factors.

        I can't help you with Vista, I'm apparently lucky to never have used it. XP is more than adequate for my current Windows needs.

          • Re:"dying breed"? (Score:5, Insightful)

            by soliptic (665417) on Monday January 21 2008, @02:01PM (#22129304) Journal
            Er, what?

            Maybe YOU don't do any graphic design, video editing, audio production, etc; maybe all YOUR computer use is text-based stuff; I don't see how you can extrapolate that to a blanket statement of fact for the entire world.

            Unless you know any graphic designers who use command line photoshop? > photoshop -select 50,101,40,50 -addtextlayer font:helvetica size:17pt antialiasing:crisp text:"Hello" -addlayerstyle styletype:bevel Much better. Right?

            Or how about, say, ATC systems? I'm sure it's really easy to spot, at a glance, two planes getting too close for comfort when you're given an 80x25 screen full of numbers, as compared to a graphical representation.

            Er... no... doesn't really work, does it. So your +4 insightful is... well... not.

      • Re:"dying breed"? (Score:5, Insightful)

        by Vellmont (569020) on Monday January 21 2008, @12:33PM (#22128282)

        I'm not saying that CLI is going to fade away, because IMO it still has lots of advantages, just saying that only unix geeks will think to use it.

        I'd say that's because the CLI tools on windows aren't very good.

        If I want to copy a file from one computer to another, it's a million times easier to use scp than it is to open up a GUI tool, drag the files around, etc. Same thing for changing file ownership of an entire directory.

        Creating a user on the other hand is a lot easier using a GUI. I don't want to have to remember obscure, seldom used commands to assign the right groups, etc.

        The mistake people seem to make is that it's an either/or choice. Shell or GUI? No, shell AND GUI.

  • How they make children (Score:5, Funny)

    by ORBAT (1050226) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:24AM (#22127322) Homepage
    who && gawk && uname && talk && date && wine && touch && unzip && strip && touch && finger && mount && fsck && more && yes; yes; more; yes; umount && make clean && sleep

  • A UNIX relationship... (Score:5, Funny)

    by hitchhikerjim (152744) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:26AM (#22127344)
    Hmm... a relationship consisting of short, efficient and flexible commands that can be combined in interesting ways. Sounds pretty good to me. But I've only seen it work in the BDSM world.

  • his kids will tame him or suffer (Score:5, Insightful)

    by m0llusk (789903) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:27AM (#22127362) Journal

    Most people aren't command line geeks because they have no desire for that. If this person has kids and empowers them then they might become anything, but if this idea of spawning a kind of clone persists then the kids are likely to be constrained, unhappy, and ultimately failures at life.

  • No graphical interface ... (Score:5, Funny)

    by StripedCow (776465) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:28AM (#22127366)
    Obviously, her looks are completely unimportant.

  • He almost had me going... (Score:5, Funny)

    by mr_gerbik (122036) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:32AM (#22127428)
    Until I read this: I've been known to actually turn down offers of "two chicks at the same time."

    Seriously though, I'd love to see the look on two girls' faces when this guy says, "Sorry ladies, I'm looking for a vi user, and you two look like you can't even use Word."

  • What a poser (Score:5, Funny)

    by $RANDOMLUSER (804576) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:32AM (#22127434)

    N.B. - on the issue of relocation. I live in a place where my income/expense ratio is proper (i.e., greater than 2:1). I'm willing to live anywhere in the world where this remains true.
    As if. A real Unix geek would use a symbolic link.

  • reminds me of this (Score:5, Insightful)

    by Mr. Slippery (47854) <tms@i[ ]mous.net ['nfa' in gap]> on Monday January 21 2008, @11:36AM (#22127498) Homepage

    Reminds me of this old column by Joab Jackson [citypaper.com]:

    Say you want to date a system administrator, or sysadmin for short. (And why wouldn't you? They rake in the phat bux for maintaining office computer networks.) The choice is clear: Go for someone specializing in Unix, not Windows. The Unix sysadmin may be slothful and go missing for entire weekends on a Dungeons and Dragons binge. But it's the Windows sysadmin who'll unwittingly hose you with a dangerous virus. And that's far worse.

    What, you might ask, could the operating system a person chooses to spend time with possibly reveal? Everything...Windows is designed for people who don't want to spend a lot of time fooling with their computers. It simplifies tasks, giving us pretty boxes to point and click at.

    ...

    Think about these qualities for a sec. Which would you rather have in a lover? Who would you rather have as an intimate -- someone who takes time to understand your quirks thoroughly, or someone who merely pushes your buttons whenever you malfunction? I'm not saying all Windows NT people are obedient, shallow half-wits driven only by desire for material gain. I'm just saying that if you want to fish a decent specimen from the dating pool, you might be better off starting on the Unix side.

  • I only see one problem... (Score:5, Funny)

    by Valar (167606) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:39AM (#22127538)
    I was quite sure that many women out there would find the ad very intriguing, until he got to the part about only using Vi. Seriously, why would you bring up your mental health conditions even before the first date?

  • Intelligent atheist white man seeks sweetie (Score:5, Funny)

    by nuxx (10153) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:45AM (#22127620) Homepage
    Don't forget the other UNIX-y posting where an Intelligent atheist white man seeks sweetie [craigslist.org].

  • If he finds such a woman... (Score:5, Funny)

    by jollyreaper (513215) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:46AM (#22127628)
    He will have to propose. I wonder if he's going to go with diamond or a token ring?

  • ONE child? (Score:5, Funny)

    by Jesus_666 (702802) on Monday January 21 2008, @12:04PM (#22127876)
    He wants ONE child? Okay, so either he doesn't want his family to go anywhere or his grasp of the Unix way is very light. Of course he needs MANY children, each good at one and only one thing:

    One child can read and write.
    One child can do math.
    One child knows how to operate a car.
    And so on.

    Then, in order to do anything useful he pipes together the children. That's the proper Unix way of founding a family.

  • How this could end up... (Score:5, Funny)

    by E-Lad (1262) on Monday January 21 2008, @12:07PM (#22127910) Homepage
    [daleg@home]~$ ./significant-other
    Reading configuration from ~/.sorc...
    Welcome to GNU Significant Other! It's Monday, January 21, 2008:

       -- It is trash night.
       -- It is recycling night.
       -- Fault in dishwasher water supply was detected on 1/19/2008. Please address by 1/23/2008
       -- "Poker Night" appointment in calendar observed. This conflicts with "Movie with kids"
       -- Snow is predicted tomorrow during the evening. Please ready sho
    ^Z
    [1]+  Stopped       ./significant-other
    [daleg@home]~$

  • I can just hear it now! (Score:5, Funny)

    by techpawn (969834) on Monday January 21 2008, @12:08PM (#22127912) Journal

    Because there are fewer and fewer of us, I must help keep our lineage alive. I am looking for someone to help me do this. I need a woman (obviously) who is willing to raise a child with me in the method of Unix."."
    Mom: There's something billy wants to say to you dear...
    Dad: What is it son?
    Son: Well, ever since I was young I knew I was different... Not like the other boy you wanted me to play with and...
    Dad: Billy? Are you telling us you're gay?
    Son: No! Not that dad...
    Dad: Well son what is it?
    Son: I've been dual booting XP for weeks now! I want to use a GUI!
    Dad: WHAT?!! I have no son!

  • Feminist Unix command (Score:5, Funny)

    by InterGuru (50986) <jhd.interguru@com> on Monday January 21 2008, @12:30PM (#22128238) Homepage
    man bash

  • Command Line Users: The new Amish? (Score:5, Funny)

    by dreamchaser (49529) on Monday January 21 2008, @12:30PM (#22128240) Homepage Journal
    I can see it now...colonies of geeks will spring up all over that are only allowed to marry each other and can't use any computer technology developed after 1986.

  • Two Girls... (Score:5, Funny)

    by Edward Teach (11577) on Monday January 21 2008, @12:33PM (#22128286)
    Ok, so the only reason he turned down two girls is because they only had one cup between them...

  • Linux sex (Score:5, Funny)

    by gringer (252588) on Monday January 21 2008, @04:18PM (#22130714)

    I need a woman (obviously) who is willing to raise a child with me in the method of Unix.
    Here's one way to do it on Linux:

    gawk; chat; look; nice; date; wine; grep; touch; play; unzip; strip; touch; expand; screen; finger; screen; latex; tangle; mount; fsck; more; yes; yes; yes; yes; screen; yes; yes; yes; more; yes; yes; umount; sleep

    • Re:Obvious Fake (Score:5, Insightful)

      by Jellybob (597204) on Monday January 21 2008, @11:52AM (#22127714) Journal
      I know you're joking, but its time to fight the "geeks can't get laid" stereotype.

      I don't know if I'm just not in the truly geeky end of the spectrum, but certainly in the area of "professional geeks" (developers, sysadmins, network admins etc.) I know very few who are single, and most of the ones who are don't have much trouble finding women, they just can't really be bothered with the dating game.

      There was once a time when geeks were kinda freaky people you'd steer clear of, but that seems to have changed as more people get computers and an Internet connection, and start to find out that we were right about it being useful all along. Sure, it's still almost impossible to explain the job of a software developer to the average computer user, but then I can't comprehend what a professional accountant must do all day.

    • Re:Obvious Fake (Score:5, Funny)

      by Ilan Volow (539597) on Monday January 21 2008, @01:15PM (#22128750) Homepage
      A real sysadmin would simply pipe one chick into the other.

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