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Mother Sues After Bebo Story Hits Press

Posted by kdawson on Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:51 AM
from the what-was-once-private dept.
slick_shoes notes a story out of England: a woman named Amanda Hudson is suing six national newspapers for defamation and breach of privacy after they ran stories based on her 15-year-old daughter's exaggerated claims about her party, published on her Bebo site. The party was held at the family's £4m villa in Spain, and the daughter's account claimed that jewelery had been stolen and furniture and a television set thrown into the swimming pool; in addition there were claims of sex and drug use. The mother says that this was all falsehood and exaggeration. A number of newspapers picked up claims and photos from Bebo and ran them nationally. From the article: "The case is expected to have far-reaching consequences for third parties who use or publish information from social networking sites. Lawyers say it could place a duty on all second-hand users to establish the truth of everything they want to republish from such sites."
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  • Editors? (Score:5, Insightful)

    by TheSkyIsPurple (901118) on Friday July 11 2008, @10:52AM (#24153353)

    > Lawyers say it could place a duty on all second-hand users to establish the truth of everything they want to republish from such sites

    Isn't that what newspaper reporters and editors are for?

    • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Insightful)

      by spun (1352) <loverevolutionary@noSPAM.yahoo.com> on Friday July 11 2008, @10:55AM (#24153399) Journal

      Fact checking is so last century. In the NEW and CONNECTED world of WEB 2.0, flash-mobs in the blogosphere fact check everything for you!

      • by Woundweavr (37873) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:29AM (#24154013)

        By US standards this case would likely be tossed out.

        The first story I found from the Daily Mail [dailymail.co.uk] included getting a response from the mother, quotes from other party goers, etc

        In the words of Jodie on her Bebo page after the event: 'There's so much damage and clothes stolen. A lot of broken doors. people cauight (sic) having sex.'

        But the teenager seemed unrepentant about the chaos she caused, adding: 'I got punched by my mum for it and grounded until the summer. wat a a BITCH!'

        Mrs Hudson, who is separated from Jodie's father, yesterday denied she had hit her daughter. ...
        One partygoer, who said he had heard about the event from friends, said: 'Somebody said we were allowed to wreck the house because the birthday girl's parents were getting divorced.

        'There were kids behaving like gangsters from a rap video, throwing stuff around and smashing things. There were chairs, tables, even a TV in the pool.' ...

        Mrs Hudson had been hoping to move and had put her home in the exclusive El Paraiso development on the market.

        Friends said she told them: 'The place looked like a war zone.
        'All the banisters have been broken. The walls are ruined, the carpets are destroyed, furniture is broken . . . It is going to take months to sort out.'

        One friend said: 'Amanda is still furious with her daughter and hasn't spoken to her for days.'

        Last night Mrs Hudson played down the furore. 'Jodie had up to 400 people, but she knows a lot of people,' she said.

        'With a party that size you are always going to end up with some damage.'

        Asked about Jodie's comments on Bebo, she said: 'I don't know what she has written on her site, and I'm not saying anything else.'

        Just because the mother denies (possibly criminal, depending on how hitting her daughter occurred and what the laws are regarding serving minors alcohol over there) the report doesn't mean it was defamation or they didn't do their jobs. Maybe the quotes were made up, and maybe the pictures from the girl's blog didn't show what they seemed to (teenagers paired up in bed, passed out drunk girls, young men/teenagers carrying beer around) but we shouldn't assume that.

        According to wiki in the UK

        A private individual must only prove negligence (not using due care) to collect compensatory damages. In order to collect punitive damages, all individuals must prove actual malice.

        The US uses a somewhat similar standard. If you've got claims by the daughter, quotes from friends of the mother, and from party goers (and these are not fabricated) then to me "due care" has probably been taken.

        • by Zemran (3101) on Friday July 11 2008, @01:13PM (#24155491) Homepage Journal

          IANAL and all the other caveats about not knowing everything...

          I think that solicitors that encourage action when that is not good professional advice, should be ordered by the courts to pay all costs and there should be no cost to the person taking action. The mother naturally wants to take action, I accept that she is asking to take action... but the solicitor is the professional and should have an obligation to make it really clear that there is no case when there is no case. If the courts made a few solicitors pay when it was beyond doubt that they had encouraged action, then it would make the rest think twice before recommending action. Such a ruling would also cut down on frivolous claims by greedy companies...

            • by x_MeRLiN_x (935994) on Friday July 11 2008, @04:51PM (#24158689) Homepage

              Why is it ridiculous? What possible harm could a half glass of cider or whatever given to a child by a parent under supervision cause? If more parents gave their children small amounts of alcohol as they grow up (e.g. at the dinner table) then young adults would be more responsible towards alcohol as in countries such as France. By "more responsible" I mean less likely to go out 'on the town' and far surpass their limits.

    • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Interesting)

      by topham (32406) on Friday July 11 2008, @10:57AM (#24153443) Homepage

      Thankfully you said 'Newspaper' editors, if we held the editors around here to that standard there would be no stories!

      Seriously, this is stupid; her daughter published the 'facts' as it were. She may have a claim, but her daughter should be enjoined from having a claim.
      If I tell you I'm a drunk, and you publish it I can't later say that it wasn't true and sue you for publishing it.

      • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Insightful)

        by DaedalusHKX (660194) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:15AM (#24153771) Journal

        Actually the ONLY way they can get away with it and NOT lose the lawsuit is to have said throughout the story "the young, 15 year old girl's blog CLAIMS that... etc etc."

        If they said "and in related news, etc mansion was host to a party and etc got high, knocked up and smashed a TV" that's libel/defamation. Claims have to be attributed as such. Only verified information can be claimed to be true. I wager most newssources wouldn't verify shit they run anymore than most consumers of said news sources would actually VERIFY the news sources reports.

        Prime example. Remember Die Hard 4? Remember the scene where everyone watches the bad guys take out the capitol? (or was it the white house?) Remember how the people near there go outside and see it is okay and still standing? What about all the other poor bastards who have no way of verifying or cannot be bothered or have had their government run communications get taken out? (Hence why i recommend everyone have a CB radio or ham rig in their home, even without repeaters, the chain effect works enough to cover a whole region of concerned individuals.)

        Verification, personal inquiry are both important factors of stories, and journalists have discovered that yellow journalism works. Why report a "claim" as a "claim"? Because it keeps the libel cases away from your door.

        • Re:Editors? (Score:4, Informative)

          by deweyhewson (1323623) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:55AM (#24154403)
          "If they said...that's libel/defamation."

          You are 100% correct. I worked for a newspaper once and my editor would constantly hammer into us that we had to "quote, quote, quote!" If somebody said something, we were to write it as "somebody said something".

          Anything not attributed as a quote is viewed as fact in the news, so quoting is of utmost importance when reporting anything that has not been proven to have occurred; if not for accuracy's sake, at least for liability protection. People will sue, and win, over the smallest details that were reported as fact when they were not verified as such.

          As a side point, any journalist who uses an online post as a source without further research is nothing short of a shoddy reporter.
    • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Funny)

      by Joe the Lesser (533425) on Friday July 11 2008, @10:58AM (#24153465) Homepage Journal

      That reminds me of how Fox News is constantly discussing crazy online rumors as if they were credible facts.

      'Reports say that Obama has a taste for kittens! What a devastating blow to his campaign! Surely he will lose ground in the animal rights voting bloc. We'll cover this next on our 3 hour special "Barack-uriosity Killed the Cat."'

      Hannity comes in: "So is the cat out of the bag on the Obama campaign? MySpace reports....." and so on and so forth

      • Re:Editors? (Score:4, Funny)

        by sm62704 (957197) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:18AM (#24153809) Journal

        Reports say that Obama has a taste for kittens! What a devastating blow to his campaign! Surely he will lose ground in the animal rights voting bloc. We'll cover this next on our 3 hour special "Barack-uriosity Killed the Cat."

        Does he huff them? [uncyclopedia.org]

    • Re:Editors? (Score:4, Insightful)

      by infonography (566403) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:08AM (#24153657) Homepage

      Sadly for the plaintiff the account came from a member of the family in a published journal (her daughter's website). How many times have there been stories of say Slashdot which were questionable. Then the comments started to fly.

      Still it all boils down to the daughter's web posting. It's close enough a legitimate source for a judge to toss it. If a journalist made it up out of whole clothe that's one thing this is from a direct source.

      Who may be a liar.

    • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Informative)

      by Dekortage (697532) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:23AM (#24153891) Homepage

      To quote John Swinton [constitution.org]:

      "There is no such thing, at this date of the world's history, in America, as an independent press. You know it and I know it. There is not one of you who dares to write your honest opinions, and if you did, you know beforehand that it would never appear in print. I am paid weekly for keeping my honest opinion out of the paper I am connected with. Others of you are paid similar salaries for similar things, and any of you who would be so foolish as to write honest opinions would be out on the streets looking for another job. If I allowed my honest opinions to appear in one issue of my paper, before twenty-four hours my occupation would be gone. The business of the journalists is to destroy the truth, to lie outright, to pervert, to vilify, to fawn at the feet of mammon, and to sell his country and his race for his daily bread. You know it and I know it, and what folly is this toasting an independent press? We are the tools and vassals of rich men behind the scenes. We are the jumping jacks, they pull the strings and we dance. Our talents, our possibilities and our lives are all the property of other men. We are intellectual prostitutes."

      • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Insightful)

        by TheSkyIsPurple (901118) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:00AM (#24153495)

        You'd think that having incorrect information would tend to dissuade customers from parting with their money

        • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Insightful)

          by Spuds (8660) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:03AM (#24153563) Journal

          You'd think that having incorrect information would tend to dissuade customers from parting with their money

          You'd think, but sadly, no.

        • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Insightful)

          by Bloke down the pub (861787) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:03AM (#24153567)

          You'd think that having incorrect information would tend to dissuade customers from parting with their money

          If that was true most of the tabloids would have gone bankrupt years ago.

            • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Funny)

              by Bloke down the pub (861787) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:14AM (#24153769)

              Tabloids occasionally print the truth.

              A stopped clock is occasionally right.

              And they occasionally do fact checking... more than can be said for the "establishment" mouthpieces that are the newspapers and media "outlets" of today.

              Do you find that when you say that face to face, people nod as if they agree with you, then their eyes sort of glaze over, then they start glancing at their watch and ... umm, gotta go - dental appointment!

              • Re:Editors? (Score:4, Interesting)

                by AdmiralWeirdbeard (832807) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:55AM (#24154401)

                Do you find that when you say that face to face, people nod as if they agree with you, then their eyes sort of glaze over, then they start glancing at their watch and ... umm, gotta go - dental appointment!

                shit, that's the funniest thing i've read in days. I have a friend who whenever the davinci code is mentioned has to interject an earnest, "its totally all true!!!1!" The nod -> eyeglaze routine is pretty well established now. Some people are just so stupid that they cannot tell the difference between critical evaluation of information and counter-establishment = true.

              • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Funny)

                by Minwee (522556) <dcr@neverwhen.org> on Friday July 11 2008, @12:07PM (#24154561) Homepage

                Those tabloids are the best investigative reporting on the planet.

                But go ahead, read the New York Times if you want. They get lucky sometimes.

            • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Insightful)

              by Zemran (3101) on Friday July 11 2008, @01:29PM (#24155723) Homepage Journal

              A Russian friend of mine once said that the difference between the east and the west is that in the east we always knew it was propaganda. :-)

        • Re:Editors? (Score:4, Insightful)

          by metamechanical (545566) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:05AM (#24153595)
          Most people don't care about true things. They care about exciting things. And to them, unfortunately, the truth is usually not exciting.
      • Re:Editors? (Score:5, Insightful)

        Pff. You guys need to learn how the business works.

        Day 1: "Daughter claims rich family had a drunken orgy party!"

        Day 2: "Mother claims daughter told an 'embellished' story about the party"

        There you go. A story and a retraction. Both of which are perfectly legal and true. The mother can sue all she wants, but what she should be doing is stringing up her daughter by her pinky toe. Instead, we end up with...

        Day 3: "Family sues newspapers for reporting embellished story"

        Even more sales! (Cha-ching!)

  • by Rycross (836649) on Friday July 11 2008, @10:54AM (#24153387)

    The fact that some party thrown by a rich 15 year old girl is national news is kind-of depressing. Am I missing something?

    • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

      I was wondering the same thing. How is this "news for nerds?" Because it involves that amazing, new-fangled social networking?
      • by pha7boy (1242512) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:02AM (#24153557)

        The fact that newspapers published the account is not "news for nerds." The story is just background for what actually is important news - namely that there could be precedent in the UK for holding news organizations accountable for publishing second hand information without fact checking.

        I wonder if the "compromise" will be that from now on newspapers will add "as reported on [insert blog name here]" on every such story meaning that they would pass responsibility for accuracy to the original source.

      • by Ukab the Great (87152) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:23AM (#24153901)

        News for nerds scandal would be a linux distribution CEO's son inviting Bill Gates to his house for dinner while his parents were on vacation believing he was having wild parties with drugs and sex.

    • OMG!!! WTF do u mean BIG parties r al ways noows i want 2 go!!!11!!!!1! OMG WTF LOL!1!!
  • Excuse me (Score:5, Funny)

    by DaveV1.0 (203135) on Friday July 11 2008, @10:56AM (#24153417) Journal

    Your privacy is invading our public.

  • I hope so (Score:4, Informative)

    by Herkum01 (592704) on Friday July 11 2008, @10:57AM (#24153449)

    I hope that they succeed. It would is nice to know that when they actually claim it is news, it is not a piece of fiction more in line with Harlequin romance novels.

  • by gparent (1242548) on Friday July 11 2008, @10:58AM (#24153457)
    "The party was held at the family's £4m villa in Spain, and the daughter's account claimed that jewelery had been stolen and furniture and a television set thrown into the swimming pool; in addition there were claims of sex and drug use. The mother says that this was all falsehood and exaggeration" Yeah. The villa is only worth £3.5m. And it was actually a DVD player that was thrown into the swimming pool. Oh and there was no drug use, only sex.
  • by Altus (1034) on Friday July 11 2008, @10:58AM (#24153463) Homepage

    If they had written a story about the blog entry?

    It seems to me that you couldnt possibly get in trouble for saying "According to her blog on myspace.com little suzy rich girls party got out of hand and someone threw a TV out the window"

    I mean, thats certainly a true statement. If that would be acceptable to print without verifying the truth of the actual event then this isnt going to have much of an impact one way or another.

    Personally I dont like the idea of a news paper regurgitating a blog as truth. Its one thing to refer to the blog, they way you might refer to another publication (ie "ABC news called florida for bush at 10:30").

    • by ceoyoyo (59147) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:02AM (#24153551)

      A newspaper or TV station should ALWAYS identify it's source. This attitude that seeing it online is somehow equivalent to being an eyewitness is silly and dangerous. I hope they lose this stupid case just so we can get some journalistic integrity back for when it matters.

  • by speedtux (1307149) on Friday July 11 2008, @10:59AM (#24153467)

    The only relevant fact that newspapers needed to check was that it was actually the 15-year old daughter that put it up for the world to see. Other than that, as the legal guardian, if the mother didn't want her daughter to post this information, she should have been a better parent.

    There might actually be a case others have against the mother for defamation of character, since she is responsible for the actions of her daughter, and her daughter might have defamed them.

    I wish parents would stop blaming other people for their own failings. Until their children come off age, what the kids do and what happens to the kids is the parents' sole responsibility.

  • Bebo Babe's Barcelona Bash: Burglary, Buggery, Breaking
  • by Madman (84403) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:01AM (#24153519) Homepage

    Newspapers have always had the responsibility to verify their stories, why should that change simply because the information's off the web?

  • by Anonymous Coward on Friday July 11 2008, @11:02AM (#24153555)

    This includes geek bloggers, soccer moms and professional reporters. You post something with the impression that it is true and don't verify...then you should be help accountable. For example. A post recently posted ON slashdot that the RIAA MADE dell remove stereo output from some of its computers. Now it seems that it may not be so true, or again that is the rumor. If it is in fact found out to be of "no merit" that blogger/slashdot post SHOULD be found responsible for losses against dell & the riaa if they were able to make a case for that. Something to think about, just because you can doesn't mean you aren't responsible.

  • by petes_PoV (912422) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:05AM (#24153609)
    I can't say I have sympathy with any of the parties in this case. If I was the judge, ruling on this libel case I'd want to award damages AGAINST both sides.

    For the lady and her daughter - abject stupidity. Once you put something on the internet, it's there for life - if you don't realise this, you are not qualified to use the internet. Just as if yo don't realise cars can kill, if improperly driven, you have no business being behind the wheel.

    For the newspapers - whatever happened to validating your sources? Is this something that only happens in the movies, or has the average rag descended to the point where all it does is reprint salacious and unverified fiction from all and any sources. They really do deserve to be sued out of existence in that case.

  • Ummm (Score:4, Insightful)

    "The case is expected to have far-reaching consequences for third parties who use or publish information from social networking sites. Lawyers say it could place a duty on all second-hand users to establish the truth of everything they want to republish from such sites."

    Aren't journalists supposed to do this ANYWAY?

  • ...in reporting? Maybe they do things differently in the UK, but certainly in the US, as Fox News demonstrated [wikipedia.org], there's no such legal requirement.
  • by nobodyman (90587) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:13AM (#24153749)

    From the article:

    She did not consent to the publication in the media of any photograph of her or her party, or of any material that she wrote on her Bebo site

    Too bad. When you publish stuff on the internet for all of the world to see it really undermines your privacy claims. Now, if this girl only allowed her stories to be seen by those she had designated as friends, then she might have a leg to stand on with respect to privacy.

    Also, the defamation claim is curious. I haven't ever seen a case where the the originator of the false statements is the same person suing the newspapers for making false statements.

  • I would be very, very surprised to learn that they weren't having sex and using drugs. 15? Rich? Sheeeit.
  • by vorlich (972710) on Friday July 11 2008, @01:58PM (#24156177) Homepage Journal
    Journalism's origins stem from the reporting of shiploads of trade goods and their arrival in port - particularly Venice and London. Advance knowledge of a ship and it's contents allowed the original speculators the opportunity to make a healthy profit. These sheets were circulated, certainly around London and Venice and it wasn't long before people used them to advertise.

    Friends of the printers (to cut a long story short) often sent lengthy letters to each other, reporting on topical events (it was before the internet) especially wars. These letters were often printed verbatim hence the origin of the word 'correspondent'.
    These reports were incredibly popular and garnered readership. Edward Mallet took the highly original step of editing them to fit the space between the ads, and the Daily Courant was born in the 1700's. Often these letters were reports of reports of reports - a bit like the internet!

    Gradually this developed into an art form and it wasn't long before reporters were despatched to write the letters themselves. War, conflict, crime and punishment and scandal soon became the daily diet of millions of readers. Then Hollywood was invented and so was the world of entertainment. Gradually readers started to prefer entertainment to 'news' - and who wouldn't? I present exhibit one 'The Sun' http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Sun/ [wikipedia.org] , which holds the world record for the highest readership of a single edition in the English language. This is closely followed by that masterpiece of twee entertainment published by DC Thomson 'The Sunday.Post' http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Sunday_Post/ [wikipedia.org] including the immortal humour of 'Oor Wullie' http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oor_Wullie/ [wikipedia.org] Oor_Wullie and 'The Broons' http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Broons/ [wikipedia.org]

    So it shouldn't really surprise anyone that people like to be entertained and since the entertainment industry is the economic dynamo of the developed nations, we shouldn't really be surprised by the sudden revelation that newspapers are in the 'infotainment' business.

    None of this is at all new, Evelyn Waugh, in 1938, lampooned the whole industry to hilarious effect in 'Scoop' http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scoop_(novel)/ [wikipedia.org]. The simple tests for 'news' is; "What is the origin of this report?" and: "Who benefits from it?" and the three eternal questions any journalist would ask any famous figure if they caught them in the elevator are: "How bad is it? Will it get any worse? And what are you going to do about". A healthy attitude of scepticism is an essential attri..


    We interrupt this broadcast to bring you ** breaking news** direct from Lynwood, California where Paris Hilton has just been released from prison having served four days of a 40 day sentence... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paris_Hilton/ [wikipedia.org]

    Bias Disclaimer: I used to be a member of the NUJ and I used to teach this subject.
  • by Matt Perry (793115) on Friday July 11 2008, @02:07PM (#24156371)

    This is what you get when you have multiple 24-hour news channels and lots of news web sites itching to have something new. There's only so much real news, and not enough of it to even fill one TV channel with content. So they have to dig for crap. This is what you get.

  • If the newspapers liftet both story and pictures from the blog, then that's a clear case of "for profit" copyright infringment.

    Just because you find a story and pictures on a blog doesn't mean that they are public domain !

    • by daedae (1089329) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:01AM (#24153523)

      Although it's true the papers should have fact-checked... isn't the daughter ultimately the one responsible for the false information? I guess suing one's own, minor, daughter probably doesn't make the same ch-ching sound.

    • by shalla (642644) on Friday July 11 2008, @11:03AM (#24153561)

      Publishing something does not make it a fact. It simply makes it published. If the information is not true, you can still get your pants sued off, as these newspapers are finding out.

      That's why you should always check your sources. Learn to protect yourself from libel suits.

    • by spun (1352) <loverevolutionary@noSPAM.yahoo.com> on Friday July 11 2008, @11:17AM (#24153805) Journal

      The paper has a duty to check facts that it publishes. How do they know that the 'daughter' publishing this information is really this woman's daughter at all, and not a jealous friend who wasn't invited?

      Journalism has undergone a frightening shift in the last thirty years. Don't get me wrong: it has always been about selling eyes to the advertisers. But there used to be professional standards. People could take pride in saying they were a journalist. Journalists like Woodward and Bernstein were heroes protecting the public interest.

      Now journalism is just another branch of the entertainment industry. Any sense of professional pride seems to be gone. Truth and accuracy don't matter.

      It's not just stories like this, either. Journalists routinely slap their names on unedited press releases and call them stories without fact checking a damn thing. Politicians and businesses know that journalists are too lazy to do their jobs.

    • Re:If my child (Score:4, Insightful)

      by justinlee37 (993373) on Friday July 11 2008, @01:25PM (#24155651)

      I'm not going to get all "PC" on you, I'm actually going to bust out some child psychology.

      In research on parenting behavior, methods of control have commonly been divided into three categories. The first type of control is the use of power by parents. Such techniques, in which parents attempt to force or pressure their children to behave in certain ways, are associated with children who are less socially competent. When parents use power to control their children, the children are likely to see their choices as governed by external forces. They do as they are told but only as long as there is a power to make them. They may become passive or rebellious.

      A second type of control is love withdrawal, in which parents show disapproval for behavior that displeases them. It may include ignoring, shaming, or isolating the child. The use of love withdrawal shows mixed results in its effects on children; some studies have found it to be acceptable, whereas other studies have found it resulted in dependent or depressed children. New research on parents' use of psychological control may have identified what parts of love withdrawal are especially toxic. When parents use guilt or manipulation to control their children, the result is anxiety and depression for children. In contrast, when parents use reasonable monitoring and negotiated control of behavior, children are less likely to get in trouble.

      The third type of control is induction. Induction includes reasoning with children and helping them understand the effects of their behavior on others. For example, a parent might say, "When you yell at your sister, she feels very afraid and sad. She feels that you don't like her." Induction is the type of control that is most likely to result in socially competent children.

      There are also clear benefits for a child's moral development when a parent uses induction because induction teaches children to think about the effect of their behavior on others. Induction both activates and cultivates the child's own logic and compassion. Children raised with induction are more likely to have internalized standards for behavior, better developed moral sensitivities, and less vulnerability to external influence.

      http://family.jrank.org/pages/1244/Parenting-Education-Content-Parenting-Education.html -- this isn't exactly a primary source but it rehashes things I learned in a "Human Development" class; I just don't feel like getting super academic on you and researching/citing the primary sources. If you really care about your children enough to give them the best childhood possible, you'll do that on your own anyway -- of course, maybe you won't, after all, you said it yourself, "I just don't care." Great attitude!

      You don't know of a better way to parent a child because you were never shown how, but please, for the sake of your children, research parenting methods before having any. Don't do it the way your Father did just because that's all you know -- it is well known that power assertion is one of the least effective means for instilling intrinsic motivation into a child. What you want is for the child to internalize the reasons for their behavior, so that when they move out at 18 years old they continue to truly believe in and follow the lessons you taught them, instead of just throwing them to the wind 'cause they are out from under the harsh glare of mean ol' Dad.