Message from Kabul 776
When his message came, the Taliban had just fled, Northern Alliance soldiers had taken over his village, and everybody rushed to barbers to cut off their beards and to nearby holes and hiding spots to dig up their Walkmen, VCRs, TVs, CD players, and -- in Junis's case -- his ancient Commodore, one of four in the village. Cafes had popped up all over, with impromptu dances and parties everywhere.
Junis's e-mail -- routed to Kabul, then Islamabad, then London -- was a reminder that there are civil liberties, and then there are civil liberties. Computers had been banned under penalty of death by the Taliban (except for the Taliban themselves), along with music and TV. Junis, a computer geek obsessed with Linux, had first e-mailed me years ago while I was writing for Hotwired. He was genial and obsessed with American culture. He loved martial arts movies, anything to do with Star Wars, and rap. He was perhaps the Taliban's prime kind of target. (Now he's furiously trying to download movies he's missed and is mesmerized by open source and Slashdot.)
"I could still see the dust of the pick-up trucks carrying the Taliban out of my village," he wrote, "and some friends and I went and dug up the boards of a chicken coop where I had hid the computer. They might have beaten or killed us if they'd found it. It was forbidden, although they used computers all of the time." He claims American commandos are skulking around dressed as Northern Alliance tribesmen.
Junis describes life under the Taliban as brutal, terrifying and profoundly boring. What the people in his town -- especially the kids -- missed most was music, posters of Indian and American movie stars (he'd kept his own decaying poster of Madonna), and American TV. Junis missed the fast-changing Web and sees, he says, that he has fallen "forever behind," and that programming is more complex than ever. But at least "Baywatch," which everyone in his town acutely missed, is back, and there's already a lot of talk about "Survivor." Junis predicts "Temptation Island" will be the number one show in Afghanistan within a month.
If the world needed another demonstration of America's most powerful weapon -- not bombs or special forces but pop culture -- it got it again this week. People all over the planet fuss about whether this healthy and democratic or corrupting and dehumanizing, but people's love for American techno-toys, TV shows, music and movies is breathaking. Watching TV pictures of tribesman on horseback, it's easy to forget that technology reached deep into this culture as well. Junis says phone service around Kabul remains spotty, but reporters, U.N. workers and foreign soldiers are wiring up. He's already made his way to some sex sites, and wishes he had a printer.
There are many computers in Afghanistan, Junis said, many in clusters in cities like Kabul and Kandahar (news reports have frequently mentioned that Bin-Laden's organization used both e-mail and encrypted files to communicate). Computer geeks are already hooking up with one another all over the country; Junis isn't the only Afghan e-mailing these days. He says other coders and gamers hid their PC's as well. Meanwhile, he's especially eager to get his hands on the Apple iPod, and has been drooling over the Apple website site since he got back online. And some things, of course, never change. "I thought they were going to get Microsoft," he wrote. "I guess not."
A decade ago, when East Berlin teenagers stormed the Wall and crossed over into West Berlin, the first thing many of them did was rush to music stores to buy tapes and CD's they'd been secretly, illegally listening to for years.
The Taliban worked to create the antithesis of the American world, one without technology, computing, the Net, music, or any vestige of popular culture (not to mention women's rights, elections, a free press or any religion except fundamentalist Islam. Junis said people in his town risked their lives repeatedly, not to fight the Taliban, but to try and listen to CD's and watch videos smuggled in from Pakistan, watched in the dark under blankets and in cellars. It seems the outcome was inevitable.
Jon, you were trolled (Score:5, Funny)
How can this Afghani geek afford an Ipod? When did DSL/broadband get into Kabul?
This story sounds fishy, but then it is Tuesday.
The big question (Score:4, Funny)
Forget the US Air Force, here comes the RIAA (Score:5, Funny)
What is the afghan's people perception? (Score:5, Funny)
What is the perception of the afghan's people about the US intervention? Do they feel that the sacrifice of innocents (accidents/mistakes on US forces part, but none less deadly) justify their new freedom? Do they feel that westerners should continue to use force to try to democratize Afghanistan? Or should the coalition now leave from their point of view?
I saw on TV an Afghan who lost 8 members of his family to US bombs. Yet, he had one message for the US forces: aim better. He did not asked to stop. Others though were very angry against the US after loosing some family member.
I want to know what the people of Afghanistan wants. I see some demonstrations in western countries asking for the bombings to stop. I say, that we might at least hear what the Afghan have to say. If they believe that the bombings are worthwhile, who are we to ask to stop these actions?
BTW, have you some websites/forums to suggest where we could directly interact with Afghanistan people? I would really like to have a few exchanges with some of them.
WHOA! (Score:3, Funny)
haha I want a pink slip with Katz's name on it for Christmas.
Re:holes in katz's story: (Score:1, Funny)
Maybe he was connecting to the internet through RFC 1149 - IP over Avian Carrier.
Yeah, it was for his school project. (Score:5, Funny)
Hi, my name is Junis. I live in a town 35 miles from Kabul in Afganistan. I am doing a school project to see how many people can read an email in 30 days. Please forward this to everyone you know, and keep the headers intact.
Thank you, your pal,
Junis
P.S. I really like Jon Katz, he is great.
The relentless pressure... (Score:2, Funny)
Forward This To Everyone In Your Address Book!!!! (Score:2, Funny)
>>>>>>>>>>>the email have
>>>>>>>>>>a closing line
>>>>>>>>>kinda like my
>>>>>>>>>>subject line?
One small nitpick (Score:3, Funny)
hoax (Score:4, Funny)
((satire))
Cheers,
-- RLJ
if you're not getting the joke [somethingawful.com]
Re:Forgive me (Score:3, Funny)
Not that this doesn't sound a bit fishy to me as well, but I'd like to point out a couple things about Kabul that you may have missed:
These people may not have much, but they do seem to have a fair share of electronics.
Secret documents, smuggled out of Osama's cave (Score:5, Funny)
We've all been putting in long hours but we've really come together as a group and I love that. Big thanks to Omar for putting up the poster that says "There is no I in team" as well as the one that says "Hang In There, Baby." That cat is hilarious. However, while we are fighting a jihad, we can't forget to take care of the cave. And frankly I have a few concerns.
First of all, while it's good to be concerned about cruise missiles, we should be even more concerned about the scorpions in our cave. Hey, you don't want to be stung and neither do I so we need to sweep the cave daily. I've posted a sign up sheet near the main cave opening.
Second, it's not often I make a video address but when I do, I'm trying to scare the most powerful country on earth, okay? That means that while we're taping, please do not ride your razor scooter in the background. Just while we're taping. Thanks.
Third point, and this is a touchy one. As you know, by edict, we're not supposed to shave our beards. But I need everyone to just think hygiene, especially after mealtime. We're all in this together.
Fourth: food. I bought a box of Cheeze-Its recently, clearly wrote "Osama" on the front, and put it on the top shelf. Today, my Cheeze-Its were gone. Consideration. That's all I'm saying.
Finally, we've heard that there may be American soldiers in disguise trying to infiltrate our ranks. I want to set up patrols to look for them. First patrol will be Omar, Mohammed, Abdul, Akbar, and Richard.
there once was this guy (Score:2, Funny)
no!
You betcha! But then he got net access
oh, well then. hoorah or something
and he liked linux
yay! that guy rocks
and he also visited some sex sites
uhm, isn't that kind of a weird thing to tell a reporter?
he liked open source stuff. especially us, and especially not microsoft
yay! that guy rocks
The explanation is obvious (Score:2, Funny)
First he gets the goat going on the treadmill that powers the dynamo. Then he takes each ip packet and writes it down, mails it, Katz types them in, gets the replies, writes them down, then mails them back whereupon this guy types them into his machine and voila! High speed goat-herder porn!
Junis e-mailed me too! (Score:0, Funny)
He finally dug up his Commodore 64, and as soon as he quit playing w/ that program that could make your floppy drive make music w/ the motor noise - he sent me a message!
It seems that he had been lucky enough to hide an extra Sat phone in the chicken coop and had modified it to reach near 1gb data transfer rates! While he was mailing me he was simultaneously watching some bootleg porn and downloading the new Britney Spears! He had to go tho, he was entering his credit card info on apple.com to get that sweet new Ipod!...
etc...
JonKatz - GO TO HELL. You are an idiot.
Re:Somewhere..... (Score:2, Funny)
No shit!
Taco's *dead*!!?!
Fsck!
Where the hell have I been...?
t_t_b
In additional amusing news (Score:3, Funny)
http://www.villagevoice.com/issues/0147/ridgewa
WASHINGTON, D.C.-Suddenly, Al Qaeda doesn't look so smart. Just
yesterday, a Times of London reporter found a cache of plans, left in
a Kabul home as the Taliban retreated, that included notes for making
a thermonuclear device. The papers sent a chill through the Western
world, since they appeared to indicate sophisticated designs for an
atom bomb.
Now the online Daily Rotten says at least part of those documents
photographed by the Times are taken verbatim from a "semi-famous"
pseudo-document that has been circulating on the Internet for years.
It's a reprint of a scientific parody called "How to Build an Atom
Bomb," from the geek-humor newsletter Annals of Improbable Research,
originally known as the Journal of Irreproducible Results.
In his report for the BBC, reporter Anthony Loyd held some of the
papers up for the camera, giving a glimpse of documents the Daily
Rotten now compares to the 1979 parody.
Even the language Loyd uses to paraphrase the abandoned material
sounds like that of the satirical document.
Describing the scene in a Times article, Loyd wrote: "The vernacular
quickly spun out of my comprehension but there were phrases through
the mass of chemical symbols and physics jargon that anyone could
understand, including notes on how the detonation of TNT compresses
plutonium into a critical mass producing a nuclear chain reaction and
eventually a thermo-nuclear reaction . . .
The parody document reads: "The device basically works when the
detonated TNT compresses the Plutonium into a critical mass. The
critical mass then produces a nuclear chain reaction similar to the
domino chain reaction . . .
a big thermonuclear reaction. And there you have it, a 10 megaton
explosion!"
To find these faux atomic-bomb plans, do a Web search for "The device
basically works" or "Let's Build an Atomic Bomb!" instructs the Daily
Rotten. "It gives us pause and joy to know the Taliban are wasting
their time downloading what amounts to joke mail and spending time
trying to discern the facts therein."
Homeland security secretary Tom Ridge acknowledged the plans had been
found, but downplayed their importance. With this Daily Rotten report,
the public may get a glimpse of why.
Reached at the Pentagon spokesperson Major Tim Blair said, "I can't
comment on that. You can find all kinds of reports, and you have to
look at which ones are credible. We issue briefings and press
releases, but we don't talk about anything dealing with intelligence.
I'm not throwing stones, but the media should check the credibility of
their sources. You all have to do your job."
The foreign editor who handled the story for the Times was not
immediately available for comment.
--
Excellent Analysis of the Real Issues (Score:1, Funny)
I rarely post to Slashdot, but after reading your latest piece, I felt the necessity to send this letter. This is by far the most insightful study of the Afghan conflict that I have read. The first real human interest story to emerge from the country of Afghanistan since the conflict.
In reading your previous articles, I thought your politics were too liberal for me. I did not understand how anyone could condone the action of murderers of children (i.e. Columbine). Now, I see that you are a true patriot. You understand the struggle, and how America truly is trying to bring freedom to the opressed of the world.
Young Junis should have the right to experience the same freedoms that are available to American kids. If he wants to hack on his Commodore, he should be able to provided that he does not break the law.
I truly hope that you use your gifts as a writer and journalist to bring us more such pieces. Please ferret out of your network more such interesting stories. I would be interested in seeing how the Afghan quality of life has improved since we liberated them from such an oppressive ruling faction.
I'd like to know how our superior value system has broken the red circle in socialist countries like China and their European counterparts like Finland and Sweden.
Its common that people who hate our love of liberty will attack you. You must be strong. The red army cannot withstand such objective evidence such as a testimonial on the superiority of our culture.
Most journalists ignore this concept. You rarely find coverage of these issues except on talk radio. Thank you for bringing sanity to the internet.
Re:I have to say ... (Score:2, Funny)
Junis, Money, me and /. Q and A (Score:2, Funny)
l. Yes, I am quite certain I haven't been had. Junis has been e-mailing me since my Hotwired days, and if he unveiled a plot to deceive me, it's pretty complex and worthy of Le Carre. Lots of people posting are pretty assertive opinions about e-mail from Kabul, but as is often the case with people who know nothing, they are the most enthusiastic about demonstrating it. Many individuals, agencies, foreign and domestic in Afghanistan have been on the Net through the conflict and getting online is not a huge deal with the relatively affluent middle-class survivors around Kabul. I am quite confident about Junis's identity (but for obvious reasons, don't want to dwell on it), and that his e-mail is also genuine.
2. Some of you have kindly offered to send money. He didn't ask for any and doesn't want any.
3. A huge number of people have e-mailed me asking if he might do a Q and A..I'm sure he would, and I think it's a great idea. I'll try and set it up.