System Administrator Appreciation Day 446
jcookeman writes "Today is System Administrator Appreciation Day: 'a special day, once a year, to acknowledge the worthiness and appreciation of the person occupying the role, especially as it is often this person who really keeps the wheels of your company turning.' Congratulations to all who keep the electrons of our global networks flowing properly!"
Congrats! (Score:5, Funny)
Are you kidding me? (Score:5, Funny)
(I kid, I kid!)
Where's my present? (Score:5, Funny)
Happy SAD day (Score:4, Funny)
Blocked! (Score:5, Funny)
And by the way.. (Score:5, Funny)
Mmhm. And I'm the Pope. (Score:2, Funny)
Looks kinda like my younger sisters Geocities site.
No appreciation from me.... (Score:3, Funny)
Happy S-A-D to me! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Are you kidding me? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:electrons don't flow (Score:5, Funny)
DUPE! (Score:5, Funny)
We need another day... (Score:5, Funny)
Me, jealous? Hell yeah. Last week I had to try to recover some data from a dead machine by taking the hard drive out and sticking it in the fridge. Without having the correct size screwdriver, so I had to fudge around with my Swiss army knife and a pair of mini-pliers. (They're a bit bitey.)
I wouldn't have minded too much but when I sent an email round asking staff not to disturb the extra-large ice-pop in the freezer, I made a reference to MacGyver and got two dozen emails back in the space of five minutes asking what the f*ck I was talking about or claiming to be too young to know what the f*ck i was talking about.
Come on. I deserve cake too, don't I?
Kiss My Admin Ass! (Score:5, Funny)
Whoohoo, I rock! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:We need another day... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Thats just great (Score:4, Funny)
I take offense to that.
System Adminiistrator Day is for Gambling (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Congrats! (Score:3, Funny)
How was last night's cricket game?
System Administrator Appreciation Day (Score:2, Funny)
...and as a show of appreciation (Score:5, Funny)
gifts (Score:3, Funny)
additions:
Beer (good stuff, not colored water)
Scotch (that's single malt, not something you'd mix, and older than 12years please)
Re:Are you kidding me? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Is This Like Secretaries' Day? (Score:5, Funny)
Re: we need a service... (Score:4, Funny)
AHHHHHH!!!! It's a consultant!! Bring out the water cannons!!!
Blocked by our corporate filters? (Score:1, Funny)
They will be getting no appreciation from me today.
The way it should be celebrated... (Score:2, Funny)
"Happy System Administrator Appreciation Day!"
"Happy what?"
"Happy System Administrator Appreciation Day..."
"You're making that up, aren't you?"
"No, I'm not." *deletes user's account*
Hope be with ye,
Cyan
Re:We need another day... (Score:5, Funny)
Warning:really offensive (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Thats just great (Score:4, Funny)
I've been dealing with that kind of attitude towards the IT department for 3 years now.
Two and a half weeks ago I was offered a position that gave me a 50% pay increase, a plethora of kick-ass benefits, and all at a place that does commercial IT support. Two weeks ago today I turned in my two-week notice, so that on Systems Administrator Appreciation Day, I would be having the last laugh!
Sysadmins don't like flowers (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Happy S-A-D to me! (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Are you kidding me? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Blocked! (Score:4, Funny)
I'm appreciative (Score:4, Funny)
The Sysadmin Price List (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Where's my present? (Score:5, Funny)
Pulp Administrator, With apologies to QT and SLJ
Do you read assembly language, Brad? There's a few lines of Code I've got memorized
EBIDIC 9D5:
"The path of the Network Administrator is beset upon all sides by the inequities of the ignorant hacker and the tyranny of jackass users.
Blessed is he who, in the name of file retention and network security, shepherds the newbie through the darkness of the Internet.
For he is truly his users administrator and the finder of lost files.
And I will strike down upon keys with great vengance and furious deletion those who would attempt to poison and destroy my network.
And you will know I am root when I lay my lockout upon thee."
I been typin' that shit for years.
And if you read it, it meant your ass.
I never really gave much thought about what it meant 'till just now.
I just thought it was just some cold-blooded shit to IM to user before I locked his ass out of the network.
But I saw some shit this mornin' made me think twice.
Now I'm thinkin', it could mean you're the jackass user.
And I'm the Administrator.
And Mr. PalmPilot here, he's the shepherd protecting my Administrator account in the darkness of the Internet.
Or it could be, you're the Administrator, and I'm the shepherd, and it's the Internet that's an ignorant jackass.
I'd like that.
But that shit ain't the truth.
The truth is...
(he levels the PalmPilot and speaks deliberately)
You're the weak
And I am the tyranny of jackass users.
But I'm tryin' Brad, I'm tryin' real hard, to be a shepherd.
Re:Thats just great (Score:4, Funny)
Your dad resembles a dialogue box?
Real sysadmins don't need appreciation... (Score:2, Funny)
What we need is root, coffee and chocolate.
And guns. BIG FUCKING GUNS!!!!
(and money
That's really sad... Here is a excerpt... (Score:2, Funny)
________________________________________________
Advice to employees on the proper use
of the System Administrator's valuable time
(In following examples, we will substitute the name "Ted" as the System Administrator)
Make sure to save all your MP3 files on your network drive. No sense in wasting valuable space on your local drive! Plus, Ted loves browsing through 100+ GB of music files while he backs up the servers.
Play with all the wires you can find. If you can't find enough, open something up to expose them. After you have finished, and nothing works anymore, put it all back together and call Ted. Deny that you touched anything and that it was working perfectly only five minutes ago. Ted just loves a good mystery. For added effect you can keep looking over his shoulder and ask what each wire is for.
Never write down error messages. Just click OK, or restart your computer. Ted likes to guess what the error message was.
When talking about your computer, use terms like "Thingy" and "Big Connector."
If you get an EXE file in an email attachment, open it immediately. Ted likes to make sure the anti-virus software is working properly.
When Ted says he coming right over, log out and go for coffee. It's no problem for him to remember your password.
When you call Ted to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under a year-old pile of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals, dried flowers, unpaid bills, bowling trophies and Popsicle sticks. Ted doesn't have a life, and he finds it deeply moving to catch a glimpse of yours.
When Ted sends you an email marked as "Highly Important" or "Action Required", delete it at once. He's probably just testing some new-fangled email software.
When Ted's eating lunch at his desk or in the lunchroom, walk right in, grab a few of his fries, then spill your guts and expect him to respond immediately. Ted lives to serve, and he's always ready to think about fixing computers, especially yours.
When Ted's at the water cooler or outside taking a breath of fresh air, find him and ask him a computer question. The only reason he takes breaks at all is to ferret out all those employees who don't have email or a telephone.
Send urgent email ALL IN UPPERCASE. The mail server picks it up and flags it as a rush delivery.
When the photocopier doesn't work, call Ted. There's electronics in it, so it should be right up his alley.
When you're getting a NO DIAL TONE message at your home computer, call Ted. He enjoys fixing telephone problems from remote locations. Especially on weekends.
When something goes wrong with your home PC, dump it on Ted's chair the next morning with no name, no phone number, and no description of the problem. Ted just loves a good mystery.
When you have Ted on the phone walking you through changing a setting on your PC, read the newspaper. Ted doesn't actually mean for you to DO anything. He just loves to hear himself talk.
When your company offers training on an upcoming OS upgrade, don't bother to sign up. Ted will be there to hold your hand when the time comes.
When the printer won't print, re-send the job 20 times in rapid succession. That should do the trick.
When the printer still won't print after 20 tries, send the job to all the printers in the office. One of them is bound to work.
Don't use online help. Online help is for wimps.
Don't read the operator's manual. Manuals are for wussies.
If you're taking night classes in computer science, feel free to demonstrate your fledgling expertise by updating the network drivers for you and all your co-workers. Ted will be grateful for the overtime when he has to stay until 2:30am fixing all of them.
When Ted's fixing your computer at a quarter past one, eat your Whopper with cheese in his face. He functions better when he's slightly dizzy from hunger.
When Ted asks you whether you've installed any new software on your computer, LIE. It's n
Re:Are you kidding me? (Score:4, Funny)
Old sysadmin wisdom: Never GREP a BISON by the INODE.
Re:Are you kidding me? (Score:5, Funny)
1. Make sure the developer doesn't have root/admin on his workstation.
2. Randomly block ports on the network and call it a security precaution.
3. Generate and openly discuss reports on web usage.
4. Put a 14" 60Hz monitor on every desk.
5. Require an act of the CEO to get a RAM upgrade.
6. Expire passwords after every login.
etc...
If the admins do the job right.... (Score:3, Funny)
Kind of a two edged sword when budget time comes around. That's why it is always good to have a network traffic generator connected to the network that can be switched on and off easily.
From the admins... (Score:3, Funny)
We're down at the local alehouse where they have 150 beers on tap, sampling our favorites out on the deck. It's a balmy 70'F, perfect outdoor eating weather. May I suggest starting with a pitcher of Hoegaarden, then moving on to Blue Moon, then Spaten Optimator, and finishing with a solid Beamish Oatmeal stout? (This is, of course, assuming you must return to the office today, which many of us will not.) Those of us who aren't into beer are enjoying a few fine martinis and daquiris, shooting the breeze over what backup solution to use next year or what new tech gadgets are on the market.
If you want to show your system administrator some love, all you need do is read his emails to the company when they are sent out, and actually respond to them. That's it. That will make most of us deliriously happy, not just today, but any day.
Tech gadgets are nice, but it's rather embarassing for you to buy them for us... we don't let our parents shop gadgets for us, and it's best you don't try either. Gift certificates are king. It's a rare geek who understands what his fellow geeks need.
Re:Are you kidding me? (Score:3, Funny)
Threat made into reality (Score:2, Funny)
Re:And by the way.. (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Congrats! (Score:4, Funny)