Bulletproof Tool For Golden Age Browsing?

An anonymous reader writes "I work in a retirement/assisted living home. Many of the residents had never used the Internet but really find it fascinating once they are given a little training. However, I've stopped introducing it to them because of the drain it puts on me. There are a million and one things that a computer novice can screw up, and I don't have time to solve all of them. These folks don't need any sophistication. and they need only the most basic options. Adjustable text size would be nice, but otherwise — no email, no word processing or editing, no printing — just Internet browsing. This may not seem like a big market, but it's getting bigger every day! Is there an absolutely fool-proof device that can provide this without requiring virus scanners and constant attention?"

suggestion:

[larry bagina]

show them lemonparty. They won't be interested any more. (then again, maybe they will).

DSL

[Tsiangkun]

Get a Damn Small Linux CD.

Boot off CD, to RAM if possible, and enjoy the internet.

100% worry free computer usage.

If they want the computer to do more than just the internet, tell
them the instructions are available, on the internet. Have fun.

Write a program tthat browses

[nate nice]

Write a simple program that calls off to their favorite sites and prints them out. Then give them paper version of what they like.

Then they can pass it around, etc. Sort of like bookmark sharing.

Re:Obvious

[DeadChobi]

What is it about all the "use Linux" posts on slashdot? Jeez, this is one of the most biased communities on the internet when it comes to operating systems. Everyone knows that Windows provides the most user-friendly browsing experience on the face of the planet.

Re:DSL

[Anonymous Coward]

Get a Damn Small Linux CD.

Just be careful. Some of those grandmother types will wash your mouth out with soap for saying the word "damn."

Re:Turn Off Javascript

[Anonymous Coward]

So, basically, your advice is that he provides them with a pretty much completely non-functional system, that will fail with most websites they might visit, purely to satisfy your religious zealoutry re typesafe languages? Good advice.

That's right. He's a zealot and his commentary on how unsafe Javascript is has nothing to do with backing up his point about turning Javascript off. In fact, his whole post is him just babbling incoherently with no related points whatsoever.

Your post, however, now that's right on the fucking money. He kind of did mention it would severely reduce functionality though. But I like yours better still. A sentence, a sentence fragment and not a singly fucking reinforcing point. Well argued, sir!

Re:Turn Off Javascript

[Anonymous Coward]

Now you listen up sonny, when I want to get on them thar intertubewebs on this computing contraption, you darn tootin better give me a web looker-loo-browsing app thingamajig with static typing in its scripting! None of this manifest type stuff, and I'll break out my horsewhip if there's any of them implicit casts in there! Now higher order types with functional dependencies would really crank my buggy up, but I'll take anything with hindley-milner inference.

Now where's my dentures, boy?

(BTW, that was a not half bad troll you did. typing systems, that's a good one.)

The solution has been around for a while

[Mean Mr. Mycroft]

Microsoft Bob should do the trick.

lynx

[turing_m]

with a 21 inch monitor (nice big text by default), OpenBSD, no X, just a terminal. What's not to like?

"These folks don't need any sophistication. and they need only the most basic options."

Re:Obvious

[mgblst]

Without an emoticon I can't tell if you're being tongue-in-cheek or trolling.

So, you must get so confused when you leave your basement.

Re:Obvious

[cooley]

Load up MS-DOS and get them to telnet on port 80 and browse like that. =)

But if you do that, make sure to tell them "In MY day, we didn't have fancy graphical web browsers and operating systems with a damn GUI. We spent hours downloading ASCII pr0n, and we LIKED IT!"

Re:suggestion:

[RabidMonkey]

oh dear god, I hadnt run across that before and totally looked it up.

please, pass me the acid.

Re:Turn Off Javascript

[AvitarX]

Have you seen random young people try to use the WiiMote to type and point?

now amplify times old people shakes, not good solution.

Re:Install the Wikipedia search plugin too

[ceejayoz]

I'm going to go vandalise Metamucil on Wikipedia and say it's commonly used to poison unwanted older relatives.

(hey, if Nigerian scams work...)

Re:Turn Off Javascript

[Anonymous Coward]

> I have not heard a peep since.

When was the last time you checked on her?