KDE Readies KOffice 2.0 As OpenOffice Competitor 337
Da Massive writes in with a link to a story on KOffice 2.0, the next generation of the KDE office suite due sometime next year. In an interview with KDE spokesman Sebastian Kugler, Computerworld reports that KOffice 2.0 will be leaner, faster, and enjoy a cleaner code base than OpenOffice. It will also feature more applications, including an Access-like database creator, a flowcharter, and an image manipulation tool. KOffice is not yet fully compatible with ODF but the claim is that 2.0 will be.
Re:Who uses KrapOffice anyway? (Score:0, Funny)
We went through the line and placed our orders for the all-you-can-eat hot bar then sat down as far away from the front of the restaurant as possible in order to keep the density of kids down a bit. Then I started my move to the hot bar. Plate after plate of macaroni and beef were consumed that evening, I tell you-in all, four heaping plates of the pseudo-Italian ambrosia were shoved into my belly. I was sated. Perhaps a bit too much, however.
I had not really been feeling well all day, what with a bit of gas and such. By the time I had eaten four overwhelmed plates of food, I was in real trouble. There was so much pressure on my diaphragm that I was having trouble breathing. At the same time, the downward pressure was building. At first, I thought it was only gas which could have been passed in batches right at the table without to much concern. Unfortunately, that was not to be. After a minute or so it was clear that I was dealing with explosive diarrhea. It's amazing how grease can make its way through your intestines far faster than the food which spawned the grease to begin with, but I digress...
I got up from the table and made my way to the bathroom. Upon entering, I saw two sinks immediately inside the door, two urinals just to the right of the sinks, and two toilet stalls against the back wall. One of them was a handicapped bathroom. Now, normally I would have gone to the handicapped stall since I like to stretch out a bit when I take a good shit, but in this case, the door lock was broken and the only thing I hate worse than my wife telling me to stop cutting my toenails with a pair of diagonal wirecutters is having someone walk in on me while I am taking a shit. I went to the normal stall.
In retrospect, I probably should have gone to the large, handicapped stall even though the door would not lock because that bit of time lost in making the stall switch proved to be a bit too long under the circumstances. By the time I had walked into the regular stall, the pressure on my ass was reaching Biblical proportions.
I began "The Move."
For those women who may be reading this, let me take a moment to explain "The Move." Men know exactly what their bowels are up to at any given second. And when the time comes to empty the cache, a sequence of physiological events occur that can not be stopped under any circumstances. There is a move men make that involves simultaneously approaching the toilet, beginning the body turn to position ones ass toward said toilet, hooking ones fingers into ones waistline, and pulling down the pants while beginning the squat at the same time. It is a very fluid motion that, when performed properly, results in the flawless expulsion of shit at the exact same second that ones ass is properly placed on the toilet seat. Done properly, it even assures that the choad is properly inserted into the front rim of the toilet in the event that the piss stream lets loose at the same time; it is truly a picture of coordination rivaling that of a skilled ballet dancer.
I was about half-way into "The Move" when I looked down at the floor and saw a pile of vomit that had been previously expelled by one of those little bastards attending kids night; it was mounded up in the corner so I did not notice it when I had first walked into the stall. Normally, I would not have been bothered by such a thing, but I had eaten so much and the pressure upward was so intense, that I hit a rarely experienced gag reflex. And once that reflex started, combined with the intense pressure upward caused by
Go for the gold (Score:5, Funny)
Re:"Competitor" my ass... (Score:0, Funny)
"While the industry is focused on the ongoing tussle between Microsoft and OpenOffice.org over document formats, the KDE project is quietly being ignored by the computing world as they work on the next generation of its own office suite, KOffice, for Linux, Windows, and Mac OS X"
Re:It doesnt compete with anything (Score:5, Funny)
Here, check this out:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Qt_(toolkit) [wikipedia.org]
(That's a link, you can click it and it will take you to another place on the internet). As you can see, QT4 is ported to Windows, and other non-x11 OSs. In an amazing twist of coincidences, Koffice is written in QT4.
Re:Why don't we think of a catchy name? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Slightly off topic, but related, Kontact (Score:4, Funny)
Why no love of Kerberos!
Especially since it already starts with a "K"!
To Koffice marketing (Score:1, Funny)
Re:why don't they think of a catchy name (Score:5, Funny)
At least you have been spared the pain of trying to bring credibility in marketing to The Gimp.
My office will be even -better-. (Score:5, Funny)
Re:That's all good. Except... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Please try my database libraries / app (Score:4, Funny)
I think you are a little late to the party. Didn't Access commit suicide like 5 years ago?
Re:why don't they think of a catchy name (Score:1, Funny)
Re:It doesnt compete with anything (Score:4, Funny)
Just what is it that slashdotters find so interesting about medium sized stringed instruments?
Re:It doesnt compete with anything (Score:3, Funny)
Cello!