Dial-Up Users "Don't Want Broadband" 593
Barence writes "The majority of dial-up Internet users say they don't want to upgrade their connection to broadband, according to a new study in the US. The Pew Internet & American Life research found that 62% of dial-up users had no interest in upgrading to a high-speed connection." (CNN is carrying the AP's story on the study, too.)
Nooo! (Score:5, Funny)
We must convert the dial-up heathens!
Send more broadband missionaries!
Re:Nooo! (Score:5, Funny)
Grandma Speed (Score:5, Funny)
Re:$12 a month versus $50 a month (Score:5, Funny)
$50/month?
Sucker! I only pay $49.95.
Re:They have never even used high-speed (Score:5, Funny)
That's silly. Sure, you need to walk a mile to turn the page, but then you're already there and the rest of the experience is the same.
Dial-up -vs- high-speed is like reading a book with only one word printed on each page -vs- reading a porno mag with embedded videos on each page.
Re:Grandma Speed (Score:3, Funny)
Reading the subject line just made me think of some elderly old maid rocking way too fast in her Cracker Barrel chair.
Made me think of a little old lady driving a giant cadillac at half the posted speed limit with a tail of 20 cars stuck behind her.
But really, she's just making excuses. What does she do during slow page loads? Take naps?
Re:Nooo! (Score:4, Funny)
Re:well duh (Score:3, Funny)
You mean the little round thing with the red light and cord isn't for talking into?
If they have dialup their mice have balls.
Re:Grandma Speed (Score:4, Funny)
Re:I'm one of those (Score:3, Funny)
I think I was just raised frugally.
Wolves are often quite frugal.
Re:well duh (Score:3, Funny)
My mice are female you insensitive clod!
My 1200bps modem works just fine for me (Score:5, Funny)
BTW, first post!
Who needs broadband? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Costs not worth it to some people (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Some people don't have a choice (Score:5, Funny)
I live in a rural aria
I'm guessing you're an Opera user.
Obligatory (Score:5, Funny)
We must convert the dial-up heathens
Why should I change? My dialup connection works fine so long as noone picks up th# $% @#$#%)G$%$#^NO CARRIER
Re:Nooo! (Score:5, Funny)
I mean, I have broadband, and it's nice for what i do. But do my parents need it?
My mom's on dialup (80 yrs old), my dad (77 yrs ols) doesn't even have a computer in his house (they got divorced the year I was married).
My friend Ralph (86 yrs old) doesn't have a computer, but he doesn't need one; he has hookers. And blackjack.
But he forgets the blackjack.
Re:Grandma Speed (Score:3, Funny)
She says that her internet at home is "perfect Grandma speed", and us "young-uns with fresh brains can handle the zip of that fast stuff."
I'll just go and make some preserves and I'll read that Internet thngammajy whan it's done a'loadin.
Re:Grandma Speed (Score:2, Funny)
The rest of us are going to hell... (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Nooo! (Score:3, Funny)
So I guess the only web he's concerned with is fishnet stockings and in that case "high speed" is not a desirable quality. :D
Re:Nooo! (Score:5, Funny)
I hope it stays that way. If it wasn't for the people on slow connections I'd never be able to frag anyone online in a FPS.
Re:Hey Torquemada! (Score:3, Funny)
I mean let's face it, once they're made up their minds you can't Torquemada anything.
Re:Interestingly... (Score:1, Funny)
That's actually not interesting.
Bad situation (Score:2, Funny)
One elderly family member with a dial-up connection.
Another elderly family member with fast connection paid through the rent, and a digital camera.
Re:Nooo! (Score:4, Funny)
How do you keep Windows patched? Oh sorry forgot this was /. how do you download Linux?
Ah, not doing either of those? For God sake, stick with dial-up I can't take the extra spam!!!
"Dialup just does not support botting" (Score:2, Funny)
Sadly, the bot-herders are mostly incompetent programmers, so I have had to disinfect computers on 33.6 lines.
One moron even tried to set up a gay porn distribution site via rootkit - on a 33K line!! I had fun with that one, though, because the owner is very macho.
"Hey, man, when did you start puttin' from the rough?"
"What?"
"Well, there's all this gay porno in these hidden folders... so I just assumed..."
"WHAT?"
"Not that there's anything _wrong_ with that..."
(pandemonium ensues, until I finally can't keep a straight face anymore)
Re:$12 a month versus $50 a month (Score:3, Funny)
Apparently behavioral modification is only for dogs.
You're just not using the shock collar [amazon.com] correctly. Try bumping it up a setting or three.
A Happy World! (Score:4, Funny)
Dial-Up Users "Don't Want Broadband"
and vice versa!
A place for everything - everything in its place. Such a happy, tidy universe!
Re:Nostalgia (Score:3, Funny)
I used to be able to tell the connection speed from the squawk during the handshake - way too much time doing tech support.
You're not the only one to have that ability. I used to actually sing along with it.
*Bong! Dee-doo deeeee-dooooo*
It really flustered me when it didn't connect at 56k, not because it was slower, but because we couldn't harmonize.
God, I'm such a loser.
Re:Nooo! (Score:5, Funny)
Those poor fools... luckily I printed a copy of the AOL homepage, so I don't worry about such things.
Re:Nooo! (Score:2, Funny)
No seriously you guys you don't understand. (Score:3, Funny)
The Internet is not something that you just dump something on. It's not a big truck. It's a series of tubes. And if you don't understand, those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material.
Re:Nooo! (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Nooo! (Score:2, Funny)
Why is parent flamebait?
We are Slashdot of Org. You will be moderated. Relevance is foobar.