Air Force To Rewrite the Rules of the Internet 547
meridiangod writes "The Air Force is fed up with a seemingly endless barrage of attacks on its computer networks from stealthy adversaries whose motives and even locations are unclear. So now the service is looking to restore its advantage on the virtual battlefield by doing nothing less than the rewriting the 'laws of cyberspace.'" I'm sure that'll work out really well for them.
There is porn of it. (Score:5, Funny)
I hope they don't overlook Rule 34.
It worked for the Army! (Score:5, Funny)
Reprise of the evil bit. (Score:3, Funny)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Evil_bit
Penny Arcade (Score:5, Funny)
As usual, Penny Arcade predicted the future. (http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2007/07/16/)
Technician: Our webs are down, sir. We can't log in!
Agent: Which webs?
Technician: All of them.
Technician: They've penetrated our code walls. They're stealing the Internet!
Agent: We'll need to hack all IPs simultaneously.
Re:Internet + secure (Score:2, Funny)
After reading the article, e.g. quoting
Enabling Air Force servers to evade or dodge electronic attacks, somehow.
Its funny how they think so much in materials entering materials when talking about a electronic/information tech issue. Like the server could jump to the side when it sees a malicious packet coming ...
Re:It worked for the Army! (Score:2, Funny)
Re:It worked for the Army! (Score:1, Funny)
Polictical speeches, punditry, injecting rumors, diplomacy, etc, etc, etc have been well known for some time but still seem to slip under the radar of most citizens including far too many in the military. Answers given to many questions at polictical interviews or debates are perhaps best described as "modulated farting", they stink but are worded to distract you from the stench of their non-answers and they of course come from an a**hole.
A spokesman for the Air-Force said, (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Disconnect (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Disconnect (Score:5, Funny)
Someone, someday will carry lost a USB thumbdrive carrying the sensitive information.
Perhaps we need a new RFC, similar to this one [RFC1149] [faqs.org], for USB thumbdrive.
The Rules are Simple (Score:2, Funny)
First Rule: Don't talk about Internet
Second Rule: Don't talk about Internet
Third Rule: ???
Fourth Rule: Profit
Re:It worked for the Army! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Disconnect (Score:5, Funny)
Because the Air Force can't catch people over the internet, that must mean that they are also vulnerable to vans with tinted windows in the car park of the armed forces branch head quarters with a 20" dish antenna mounted on top.
Re:Disconnect (Score:3, Funny)
That's called 'Somebody makes a call' and 'Guys with automatic weapons show up to ask questions'.
Re:Disconnect (Score:3, Funny)
If they were smart they would post their problem on Slashdot and let all the nerds figure out a solution for them for free......
In other news... (Score:2, Funny)
questions over hot coffee? (Score:1, Funny)
of course, what if the van had no doors to open for the question to be asked?!? would they go down a chim chiminey chim chim charoo? i grow wheatgrass on my van roof, and no passenger doors and no cargo doors were made. Only have the front cab window and a Sun roof with a grill/cremation furnace underneath. do your worst, USAIRSDMCFFRIFAAFBCIABATFECES!
Someone tell them the Evil Bit was an April Fool (Score:3, Funny)
Why, no one has ever thought of that before..
Re:In soviet Russia... (Score:1, Funny)
That sounds like a noble cause. It surely beats watching Sally Struthers blather on about how we have to help feed them.
Consider it done (Score:4, Funny)
lameness filter forced me to munge the layout
RFC1149a - Standard for the transmission of flash memory on avia
Network Working Group_____________ TubeSteak
Request for Comments: 1149a__________LOL WTF
3 November 2008
A Standard for the Transmission of Flash Memory on Avian Carriers
Status of this Memo
This memo describes an experimental method for the encapsulation of
flash memory in avian carriers. This specification is primarily
useful in Metropolitan Area Networks. This is an experimental, not
recommended standard. Distribution of this memo is unlimited.
Overview and Rational
Avian carriers can provide high delay, low throughput, and low
altitude service. The connection topology is limited to a single
point-to-point path for each carrier, used with standard carriers,
but many carriers can be used without significant interference with
each other, outside of early spring. This is because of the 3D ether
space available to the carriers, in contrast to the 1D ether used by
IEEE802.3. The carriers have an intrinsic collision avoidance
system, which increases availability. Unlike some network
technologies, such as packet radio, communication is not limited to
line-of-sight distance. Connection oriented service is available in
some cities, usually based upon a central hub topology.
Frame Format
The flash memory is packaged, inside a small waterproof container,
and formatted to FAT32. The waterproof container is attached to the
back of the avian, between the wings, as a backpack. The bandwidth
is variable and limited by the carrying capacity of the avian.
Upon receipt, the backpack is removed, the flash memory extracted
and checked for physical and liquid damage.
Discussion
Multiple types of service can be provided with a prioritized pecking
order. An additional property is built-in worm detection and
eradication. With time, the carriers are self-regenerating. While
broadcasting is not specified, storms can cause data loss. There is
persistent delivery retry, until the carrier drops. Audit trails
are automatically generated, and can often be found on logs and
cable trays.
Security Considerations
Security is a problem during normal operation, as flash memory
has a non-trivial and intrinsic value. Special measures must be
taken (such as data encryption) when avian carriers are used in
a tactical environment.
Re:achilles heel (Score:1, Funny)
What? The US Air Force is one of the youngest Air Forces that exist, introduced as recent as 1947.
Nowhere near enough time for sodomy to become a tradition.
Re:Disconnect (Score:5, Funny)
A googol is a one with a hundred zeros.
I internet all the time.
Re:Disconnect (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Replace TCP/IP (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Only traitors will vote for Oook-oook Banana (Score:4, Funny)
I would mod it to +32,768.
Re:Disconnect (Score:5, Funny)
whitehouse.gov is the real official website of the executive branch, while whitehouse.org and whitehouse.com are not (though this example is a bit dated).
How so? Hasn't the White House been a commercial operation for the past 8 years, for sale to anyone for the right price?
Of course, the more cynical among us will claim that it has always been so. Others would suggest that at least whitehouse.org is inappropriate, though it might have been better to suggest that during the Clinton administration.
Re:They've solved their own problem (Score:4, Funny)
You check the news by using machines connected to the internet.
The machines that decide which hell hole to send you into with what gear and such are physically separate.
Also - as a Marine, you should already know the news, but in case you missed it: Yesterday, the Marines kicked ass. Today the Marines will kick ass. Tomorrow's forecast calls for the Marines to kick ass.
Re:Disconnect (Score:5, Funny)
As opposed to turn-based?
Re:Only traitors will vote for Oook-oook Banana (Score:4, Funny)
Signed integer limit is +32767. 32768 is only possible in the - domain!
He went long.