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Nationwide Domain Name/Yard Sign Conspiracy 324

Posted by timothy
from the tragically-yes-I'm-single dept.
robertjmoore writes "Everywhere I go lately, I see these lawn signs that say "Single?" and then give a URL with my town's name in it. Being a huge business intelligence geek with too much time on my hands, I decided to track down who was behind them and wound up uncovering ten thousand domain names, a massively coordinated and well-funded guerilla marketing machine, and the $45 Million revenue business hiding behind it all. Hot off the presses, these are my findings."
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Nationwide Domain Name/Yard Sign Conspiracy

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  • signs (Score:2, Informative)

    by Anonymous Coward

    Those are all over SE PA. West Chester in particular.

    • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

      by SputnikPanic (927985)

      Ditto for the suburbs of DC. It's like road spam.

    • Together (Score:5, Interesting)

      by Marxist Hacker 42 (638312) * <seebert42@gmail.com> on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:44PM (#25666195) Homepage Journal
      Has been around since long before the web- this is just their latest marketing technique. I'm actually a somewhat satisfied customer- turned out to be a great way for a geek to get a family, just faxed them my commute map and they introduced me to a gal who became my wife two years later. It helped greatly that her apartment was halfway home on my commute.
      • Re: (Score:3, Interesting)

        But why not do subdomains, it has to be insanely cheaper?

        Almost every demographic I've listened to the radio in has *helpwanted.com. I doubt that people would mess up *.helpwanted.com, plus it'd be MUCH cheaper.

        • Re: (Score:3, Informative)

          by doconnor (134648)

          It seems to be that cost of printing planting these signs are much higher then the cost of a domain name, so it's no big deal to them.

        • Re:Together (Score:5, Informative)

          by asylumx (881307) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @05:19PM (#25666725)
          RTFA, it explains this (in my own words): The localized domains give the impression that this is a local shop so the perceived likelyhood of finding a match are higher.
          • Re:Together (Score:5, Interesting)

            by conspirator57 (1123519) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @07:01PM (#25668193)

            not in oversaturated markets. When these started springing up around DC with different neighborhood/town names in the same style I leaped to the conclusion the article draws. It is good to see it confirmed though. Additionally, since the geographical granularity is so hilariously fine, it seemed less than likely that non-transplant locals were behind it. (Of course it could have been non-transplant franchisees getting buffaloed by their franchise distributor.)

            Franchise distributors have a strong proclivity to assume your market is like the market where they come from and bully you into making decisions that are more valid for that market than yours. E.g. I knew a Blimpie franchise owner who was bullied by the franchiser into following a NY-NJ business model for a fast food restaurant: find an office building and rely on the building to supply the majority of your customers. The problems with this in the DC area are several, but here are two of the biggest:

                  -most DC buildings are smaller than NY buildings (esp in DC itself due to the convention of not building higher than the Washington monument.)
                  -due to lower population density and poorer public transit, parking is usually needed in DC whereas NY restaurants can ignore this, relying on foot traffic.

            These and others contributed to the failure of the franchise.

            As an aside, knowledge of how to sleuth out domain registration and correlation is somewhat de rigeur for most of us in the Slashdot audience, and as such should reduce the newsworthiness of the story.

        • Re:Together (Score:5, Insightful)

          by demi (17616) * on Thursday November 06, 2008 @05:24PM (#25666801) Homepage Journal
          I can see two or three minor arguments for using a top-level .com address: One is a result of your argument--among anyone who has a vague idea that domain names have to be purchased, they may have an understanding that it might be kind of expensive, and therefore it seems more "selective" than something which is obviously just a hierarchy. That is, the internal logic goes like this: "houston.dating.com" is just part of "dating.com", it's not special for houston, but "houstondating.com" is only for houston so there'll be a lot of locals in it. The second is that people actually just screw up subdomains to a surprising degree. People seeing a sign will remember the words "houston dating dot com"--they never remember dots or hyphens or anything like that. So they go home and type "houston dating.com" or "houstondating.com" in their web browsers and get your site. (In actuality, they often type "www.houstondating.com" as well, regardless if that's correct or not).
        • Re:Together (Score:4, Insightful)

          by Gat0r30y (957941) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @05:30PM (#25666885) Homepage Journal
          To give the illusion that this is actually some sort of local organization?
      • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

        by Broken scope (973885)
        Clearly, their marketing has invaded Slashdot.
  • peh. (Score:5, Funny)

    by apodyopsis (1048476) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:24PM (#25665933)
    yes, yes, yes, I'm sure you uncovered a conspiracy of epic proportions behind the dating sites, but this is /. and only one thing matters....


    did you get a date?


    why yes, I am new round here.. how did you know?
  • Conspiracy? (Score:4, Insightful)

    by kalirion (728907) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:24PM (#25665939)

    Do the yard signs read your thoughts and beam them to a satellite? Are they emitting high levels of gamma radiation? Are the dating sites linked to Al Qaeda?

  • by novalogic (697144) <aramovaNO@SPAMgmail.com> on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:25PM (#25665945)

    Even singles sites are lonely enough to pay for some action... I thought I was the only one willing to pay out $100 for head...

  • but do they work ? (Score:2, Interesting)

    by Anonymous Coward

    Has anyone seriously got a date from one of these sites ? It seems Mr. Moore overlooked a vey obvious question in his research.

  • by apt142 (574425) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:26PM (#25665959) Homepage Journal
    This is extremely fascinating. I'm not quite sure how it becomes news for nerds. But fascinating none the less.
    • by MrSparkle (127251) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:33PM (#25666051)

      Guerrilla Marketing indeed. The article itself is a slashvert for the author's company. Nice.

    • by Red Flayer (890720) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:43PM (#25666183) Journal
      Why is it news for nerds? The same reason you found it fascinating.

      Guy observes something odd related to his field of work.

      Guy notices more oddities, all related.

      Guy gets an itch to figure out what is going on, and scratches the itch.

      Guy keeps on scratching until he's completely satisfied.

      Seriously, what nerd hasn't done the same thing in their particular field of interest? Whether it's the grepping to find instances of an odd item in your logs, or statistical analysis to compare voting records by state to federal balance of payment figures, or figuring out how to make the pelvic actuators on your girl robot work properly, one thing all nerds have in common is sleuthing.

      Nerdhood, to me, is defined by inquisitiveness and a strong dedication to finding answers and increasing our knowledge. So yes, it's news for nerds, since we can all relate to the author's search for truth.
      • by Thaelon (250687)

        Since when is this type of behavior for us restricted to our fields of interest?

        To me, we're monkeys to the monkey power. Curious as all hell and our biggest weakness is a problem to solve.

        To make matters worse, we subconsciously define almost everything interesting as a problem. And once we've done that...well, you might as well go make tea, cause we're not letting go until we've solved it.

      • by RobertB-DC (622190) * on Thursday November 06, 2008 @05:44PM (#25667051) Homepage Journal

        ...or figuring out how to make the pelvic actuators on your girl robot work properly...

        Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

      • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

        by Zarquil (187770)

        Whether it's the grepping to find instances of an odd item in your logs

        Guilty!

        or statistical analysis to compare voting records by state to federal balance of payment figures

        Guilty!

        or figuring out how to make the pelvic actuators on your girl robot work properly

        *GASP* Who told you?

        *SLAMS DOOR*

    • Yeah, it was a great read. I see the signs periodically in Minnesota, I used to live in Eagan and the first time I saw the signs they were misspelled as Eagen or Egan but a few weeks later they were fixed.

      Luckily (???) I'm already married so I don't have to worry about this stuff anymore.

    • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

      by Weaselmancer (533834)

      It's news for nerds because they're gobbling up space on nameservers. It does affect you.

      BTW, these signs are all over NE Ohio as well. I concluded it was some local get-rich-quick schmuck with a magic marker. Seriously interesting to find out that's not the case.

    • by Facegarden (967477) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @05:53PM (#25667177)

      This is extremely fascinating. I'm not quite sure how it becomes news for nerds. But fascinating none the less.

      Maybe you're being sarcastic, but i really don't see why this is interesting, really. Upon reading the article, it seems to me the guy has the reasoning powers of a shrew - it was obvious to me after seeing just two identical signs with different addresses that this company must be doing this all over the place. The author makes it sound like it's some crazy complex conspiracy and blah blah blah. Hey, guess what!? BayAreaHelpWanted.com is also part of a similar situation! There is also SacramentoHelpWanted.com and a bunch others. Gasp! Someone is using location specific domain names as a way of appearing more local!

      Next he'll find out that the Shane Co. is not a local mom and pop diamond company, but a huge nationwide chain, with ads targeting specific areas (our ads only mention the 3 local stores, for example, and Tom Shane always makes himself sound so down to earth that he couldn't possibly be the head of a huge chain).

      Really, i'm surprised that anyone is surprised by how this works.
      -Taylor

  • by Anonymous Coward on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:27PM (#25665979)

    I think you missed the point. You were suppose to go to the URL to get a date NOT research the registration.

  • I was going to bitch about the submitter advertising his company in the summary but after reading the article, I say that he has earned it. I didn't much care about this company but the whole detective process was quite fascinating.

    Cheers

    • Re:Well done (Score:5, Interesting)

      by Anonymous Coward on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:37PM (#25666107)

      I was going to bitch about the submitter advertising his company in the summary but after reading the article, I say that he has earned it. I didn't much care about this company but the whole detective process was quite fascinating.

      Agreed.

      What I'd like to see next is this guy taking out the "Crazy Fox" scam. Late-night TV commercials with the same video, namely a poorly-rendered CGI fox, talking about what an awesome home-based-business... yadda yadda yadda. The commercials are identical, except for a random number prefixed or suffixed to the domain name containing the string "crazyfox".

      It's obviously a pyramid scheme of some sort, but the mechanism of spamvertizing it is ultimately the same as that employed by the "randomaffiliatename"{singles|dating}.com scam. The only difference is that it uses TV commercials (which are probably the "thing" being "sold" by the people at the top of the pyramid) instead of lawn signs.

      • by HTH NE1 (675604)

        I'm more concerned about the "send us your old and worn out gold jewelry ads".

        I miss the DeVry metallic zombie ads. I particularly liked it when ads inserted by the local cable company replaced them, but at the end of the block, you saw just a flash of the zombie at the end. AAH!

        • Re:Well done (Score:5, Informative)

          by ShaunC (203807) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @07:10PM (#25668349)

          I'm more concerned about the "send us your old and worn out gold jewelry ads".

          Rob Cockerham recently tested out their scam by sending them a bunch of junk spray-painted gold [cockeyed.com]. They sent him back a check! It was only $1 or so, I guess it's a consolation prize they send to anyone who bothers to mail in an envelope.

          Someone else tried it with actual gold [cockeyed.com] and found that the prices they're willing to quote you (at least initially) are way below the true value, but if you complain about their offer, they'll make a reasonable one.

  • Fines? (Score:5, Insightful)

    by Ecuador (740021) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:32PM (#25666041) Homepage

    Now that we know who is behind putting up all these signs, apparently without permission, won't there be some huge fines coming up?

    • by GIL_Dude (850471)
      That's exactly what I was wondering. I don't know about the local statutes in all the areas where these folks operate, but at least in a few of them it must be illegal. In some, advertising may not be legal, in others it may be a littering offense - but it can't be something that is just allowed everywhere.

      It is probably just a low level annoyance for each property owner (what, they get a sign like this a couple of times a year each), and without knowing who to complain about it would be difficult to ever
      • Re:Fines? (Score:5, Interesting)

        by HTH NE1 (675604) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @05:13PM (#25666619)

        In my city, a little old lady was arrested walking down main street placing more of these signs by none other than the chief of police. The signs stopped appearing for awhile, but apparently they got someone to replace her.

  • by smooth wombat (796938) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:33PM (#25666049) Homepage Journal

    the low percentage of signs advertising for asians.

    Mmmm, asian women. You can eat a lot because you never fill up!

    • Meh, just head to Macon, GA or Monroe, LA. When the cops in those towns feel that they need some good publicity, they bust the places to seem like they're "doing something." That being said, they probably finally ran some of them out of Macon for a long time...those places are getting notorious for human trafficking and smuggling...
  • by Anonymous Coward on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:34PM (#25666059)
    These signs appear in my neighborhood about once a week in the wee hours of Monday morning. I usually remove about 10 of these signs from my neighborhood by 8:30 am. To date I have disposed of about 250 yard signs. It is illegal to post the yard signs on my property and my fellow home owners property without our permission. Thanks to your research our lawyers will be able to send letters to the proper people now.
  • by Minwee (522556) <dcr@neverwhen.org> on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:34PM (#25666069) Homepage

    High churn rates mean new customers have low, volatile expected lifetime values. This has a negative impact on the equity value of each customer, making it difficult to justify the valuation multiples seen by membership-driven websites in other verticals.

    ...but an English translation might be more accessible.

    • Re: (Score:3, Informative)

      by gnick (1211984)

      High churn rates mean new customers have low, volatile expected lifetime values. This has a negative impact on the equity value of each customer, making it difficult to justify the valuation multiples seen by membership-driven websites in other verticals.

      ...but an English translation might be more accessible.

      People don't keep their memberships for very long. Because of that, the difference between your recruiting cost and your subscription price has to be wider than other membership sites.

      Better?

    • Translation:

      High churn rates mean new customers have low, volatile expected lifetime values.

      People don't stay on dating sites for long

      This has a negative impact on the equity value of each customer, making it difficult to justify the valuation multiples seen by membership-driven websites in other verticals.

      So you don't make that much money per customer
    • by Red Flayer (890720) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:57PM (#25666373) Journal
      Well, since the author kindly provides a plug for his company's services, the translation is:

      If you can understand what these terms are, I can communicate with you professionally, and maybe you could use my services.

      If you don't understand these terms, I hope you enjoy this story.

      If you don't understand these terms, or only somewhat understand them, but feel like you want to use these terms to impress your bosses, you need my help. Contact me and we'll work something out.
  • by D Ninja (825055) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:35PM (#25666079)

    I know I'm slightly off-topic here, but I really have to wonder about timothy's choice of department for this article. It is:

    from the tragically-yes-I'm-single dept.

    Now, I am not trashing people who are in relationships or who are married or anything else. Please do not take my response that way. But my question is - why is it so "tragic" these days if someone is single? It seems as if everybody spends much of their waking time thinking about whether or not they have a date Friday night and the never do something with their lives. I personally have a number of a friends (girls tend to be the worst offenders) that gain their self-esteem from whether or not they are in a relationship. That seems horrible to me (and a really crummy way to live).

    I don't know...mini-rant I suppose. I guess I just don't see what the big deal is about being single. Yeah, it *can* be lonely at times. But even people in relationships can be lonely. (On the flip side, I do know singles who can be alone, but their not lonely.) Being single offers so many advantages - your time is yours, your money is yours, you aren't tied down, and single people (especially ones who are content with that) tend to adventure a lot more.

    Why being single = a bad thing, I don't think I'll totally understand.

    Any response back from anybody here on Slashdot?

    • Re: (Score:2, Insightful)

      by SeanGilman (1083559)
      It's more a statement of how the person saying it feels about being single. If you did not feel being single was tragic you would probably state it along the lines of "yes-I'm-single dept"
    • by smooth wombat (796938) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:49PM (#25666261) Homepage Journal
      More or less agree since the logic is that if you're single, you're somehow worth less than someone who's with someone (i.e. you're a loser). Sort of like if a woman isn't married by 30, she's over the hill.

      As far as the money/time/etc is concerned, agreed, it is yours and it is great not having to worry about anyone bouncing a check, spending more than you had planned or a whole host of other things.

      The flip side, as you allude to, is that there are those times you want to spend it with someone, whether a football game, a movie or a simply walk in the woods. Then there's the whole human touch thing for those of us who are of the affectionate type. It's especially difficult when you work with a few cuties and your mind has lascivious thoughts of them throughout the day. Not good for work performance.

      Then again, dating is like combat [earthlink.net] so it's not necessarily an easy thing to do.

      But then, what do I know? I have an entire region of women who want nothing to do with me unless they want a problem solved.
      • Re: (Score:3, Interesting)

        by skeeto (1138903)

        This line caught my attention in your essay,

        No longer is dating an activity to be pursued because one wants to find their 'one and only' but rather, dating is an investment in time.

        Like any statement that involves the phrase "these days", "nowadays", and "in this day and age" it is actually the opposite of what is stated. Dating today is probably more about finding the "one and only" than ever before.

        Case and point, after my grandfather died and we were sorting out his belongings I had the opportunity to look through some of his old books. I came across a book he had during his college days, the 1950's, that was about college study prac

    • by Anonymous Coward on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:51PM (#25666301)

      I think that, quite frankly, one of the most painful issues with being single for geeks is when we have friends who constantly enjoy the pleasures of physical relationships. I, for one, have a friend who is constantly "pulling women from the bar" because "variety is the spice of life". Sure, he's always complaining to me that he will never find a good girl... But at least he's getting to have some fun in the sack.

      For us pragmatic geeks who think about consequences, consider other peoples feelings, and simultaneously have the same mammalian urges as our more risky, wreckless friends, it's clear how one can feel that being lonely is tragic. ... comming from a 24 year old virgin who has more experience writing in assembly than hacking into panties.

    • by jandrese (485)

      why is it so "tragic" these days if someone is single?

      Because you won't pass on your genes?

      • by martyros (588782)

        Because you won't pass on your genes?

        Unless he's 40, there's still plenty of time for that.

        Seriously, I dated two girls in high school,and then didn't date anyone until 27, when I met the love of my life. Now I'm really happy. The not-dating wasn't really on purpose, but it sure saved a lot of hassle and broken hearted-ness; and it meant that I had a solid 10 years to be really free to do my own thing. It probably also saved me from a highly sub-optimal decision: I'm not really that picky, and if I'd b

    • Because evolution has hard wired us to want to procreate and pass on our genes? And for the vast majority of our existence on this planet, that has required a relationship? At least for the past couple hundred million of years.

    • by merreborn (853723) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @07:17PM (#25668437) Journal

      why is it so "tragic" these days if someone is single?

      I believe the "moral" imperative to "be fruitful and multiply" comes from a desire of certain subgroups (mostly religious and ethnic in nature) to grow themselves. People born in to your church/ethnic group are pretty likely to stay loyal to it.

      From this simple goal come many other "moral" values: anti-abortion, anti-birth control, anti-homosexuality, anti-promiscuity, anti-interracial marriage, and anti-singlehood.

      However, the world in which these values formed is very different from the world we know today. A few centuries ago, with high infant and childhood mortality, a much higher birthrate was necessary to produce enough adults of childbearing age (the extra hands on the farm helped too).

      Today, childhood mortality is incredibly low meaning most children make it to child-bearing age. The threat of overpopulation, rather than extinction, is now looming. Additionally, birth control dramatically alters the consequences of sex.

      Our moral values are only slowly catching up, hence the intense clashes over abortion and homosexuality.

      In short, being single is "bad" because we still have yet to shed some antiquated moral beliefs that aren't nearly as applicable in the modern world as they once were.

  • Thank You. (Score:3, Interesting)

    by cadeon (977561) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:36PM (#25666085)
    I've been wondering the exact same things, but been too apathetic and lazy to do the work.

    This is genuinely relevant to my interests, and made my day better.
  • by sootman (158191) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:36PM (#25666093) Homepage Journal

    If you hate them as much as I do, visit this site [causs.org] for tips and contact your local code enforcement office.

    Legally, they are no different from litter. If you don't have a permit to leave something in a public place, it's nothing but trash. That said, the neanderthal assholes who post them might not be aware of that* and almost certainly won't be happy if they catch you taking them down, legally right or not, so be careful when picking up trash.

    * and I'm sure the assholes who SELL the signs never mention it, either.

    • Thanks, I can't stand these damn signs either. I thought it was just a problem around where I live. They appear to be planted around intersections and exit ramps by someone leaning out of their car in the middle of the night. Since they are close to the curb I've had the urge to drive over them. As if the trash that blows off of lazy people's trucks wasn't bad enough.

    • That said, the neanderthal assholes who post them might not be aware of that* and almost certainly won't be happy if they catch you taking them down, legally right or not, so be careful when picking up trash

      I don't know that they would be mad. The guys who are hired to plant the signs won't have any interest as to whether they work or not. Their boss tells them "Put all these signs up and I'll give you $20." If you followed them closely, picking up the signs right after, some of them might realize that whoever is paying them minimum wage might drive by later to make sure they weren't just being tossed in the trash, and they won't get hired again. But the point of the signs is that they are cheap and dispen

    • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

      by agrounds (227704)

      I really thought I was the only one that got angry enough to actually yank the signs out of the ground. Thank you so much for that link! It's good to know I am not alone in my neurosis.

      I usually just pull them up and leave them on the ground because I don't want to get my car trunk dirty.

      I know what I will be catching up on tonight. Now if only we could destroy all the billboards too...

  • I had actually seen a few of these in my local area, thanks for clearing up who they belong to anyway.

    The McCain-Palin signs are mostly gone, the Obama signs are mostly gone as well as of today. All of a sudden I'm seeing Fair Tax signs pop up.

    The amusing signs on my drive to work outside a (presumably) very right wing house expounding me to not vote for Obama as he kills babies (eg supports abortion) were still there this morning, though.

    And erm, is it a slow news day?

  • Yep, in NC Too (Score:2, Insightful)

    by Jamonek (1398691)
    In the roads of NC we are starting to see more and more of these signs. Seems like you just can't get away from the Net
  • Next, can you figure out what scam artist posted all of those "Real Estate Investor Seeks Apprentice 20k Per Month" signs last year? All the signs used to be identical, but they now show things like "Buy Foreclosed Houses" instead.

  • But it is just another form of spam marketing. And as the article notes, the 'big national' dating sites are of little use if there are only one or two members within 200 miles of where you live.

    That said, maybe /. should start a dating site. :P

  • *Applause NOW* (Score:3, Interesting)

    by Seakip18 (1106315) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:44PM (#25666197) Journal

    Great primary research and very entertaining. Reminds me of the p-p-p-p-power book scandal. Gotta wonder if he had a slow day(s) with his business to do this.

  • by azav (469988) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:51PM (#25666295) Homepage Journal

    DallasSingles.org, LasColinasSingles.org. Isn't it illegal to plop these signs on public land? I hate this crap.

  • by HomerJ (11142) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @04:55PM (#25666357)

    I thought secret agents about various towns would go to these websites and put in their "special" information. Then they could get secure messages back and forth. If someone else used them, they just got some boiler plate thing. I thought the whole thing was a vast government project. Like those CIA numbers stations.

    I'm disappointed to find out it's nothing more than spam for a "dating" site. Really kills my faith in conspiracy theories.

  • Excellent novel...I swear it reminded me of Snow Crash because of the immense detail.

    There is some crazy detail in this story and I must give credit to the author. You deserve a shiny metal for an article that long and well written....and excellently researched

    You might be the next Neal Stephenson of the spam novel world XD

  • Good read... (Score:3, Insightful)

    by skelly33 (891182) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @05:17PM (#25666695)
    I enjoyed the read particularly because I've done similar witch hunts myself in the past and I think it would be beneficial for others to follow their nose similarly. I'm less interested in the entertainment from tracking a legitimate business however and more so in exposure of crime rings related to fraud, ID/CC theft, domain hijacking, etc. Those ones can be pretty vast in scale and very difficult to track down. Some of them put up impressive fronts too such as legitimate "ICANN Accredited" domain registrar services, etc. - but make no mistake, they're rotten to the core. If more people actively pursued and exposed these types of organizations perhaps we'd all be a little better off...
  • Friend got scammed (Score:3, Informative)

    by db10 (740174) on Thursday November 06, 2008 @06:41PM (#25667891)
    .. I didn't believe him when he told me he paid ~$2500 for this.. He tried to get his money back after he realized that he wasn't getting any dates, with no luck. A fool and his money are soon parted my friends.

If money can't buy happiness, I guess you'll just have to rent it.

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