China Defines Internet Addiction 201
narramissic writes "Three years after the first clinic dedicated to Internet addiction opened in Beijing, Chinese doctors have now officially defined it as an ailment. Those afflicted with this ailment spend six or more hours a day online and exhibit at least one of the following symptoms: difficulty sleeping or concentrating, yearning to be online, irritation, and mental or physical distress. Do you meet the criteria? You're in good company: About 10 percent of China's 253 million Internet users exhibit some form of addiction to the medium, and 70 percent of those people are young men, an official Xinhua News Agency report said."
First psot (Score:5, Funny)
What did that say? (Score:5, Funny)
I read that as "China Defends Internet Addiction".
I hear they also have a problem with youth in asia, but I've been assured that the government has the problem well in hand.
Just One More Way for Them to Stop You (Score:5, Funny)
About 10 percent of China's 253 million Internet users exhibit some form of addiction to the medium, and 70 percent of those people are young men, an official Xinhua News Agency report said.
News Anchor: And in today's news, an unnamed Chinese dissident has been treated in Beijing for <sinister sounding voice>internet addiction</sinister sounding voice>. After monitoring his internet usage and anti-government e-mails through his ISP, the government was able to find the man and get him the help he needs at a special government run institution at a remote location for his own good. Let's hope he has a swift recovery ...
Wow work related injury here I come (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Wow work related injury here I come (Score:3, Funny)
I guess they'd be irritated and in physical distress after 6 or more hours on the internet, unless they were surfing with their laptop in the washroom ...
As for "work-related injury" - no problem. You get fired, lose your internet access, problem solved.
Looks like they have defined IT jobs as an ailment (Score:5, Funny)
Each of which is all too easily inflicted at the hands of a PHB [wikipedia.org] (cluelessly imposing impossible deadlines), without one single minute of WoW involved...
Get a real addiction ... (Score:2, Funny)
difficulty sleeping or concentrating, yearning to be online, irritation, and mental or physical distress.
Get a real addiction--I sucked dick for bandwidth!
Step 2 (Score:4, Funny)
Step 1 is admit your addiction... yup, i'm addicted.
Well if step 2 is submit to a higher authority.
Well, I have submitted to the power of Google.
Now leave me alone, I got me some good internet.
Re:What did that say? (Score:2, Funny)
It's a disease! Just like teh gay!
Crackberry (Score:5, Funny)
So if my blackberry is constantly connected to the internet and it's on 24/7, I guess that means
...
...
I'm ... what were we talking about? I was checking my mail.
The COMPLETE 12 Step for Chinese Internet Addicts (Score:3, Funny)
I'll run your comment off right off the rail
1. We admitted we were powerless over the Internet (even the filtered one in China) - that our lives had become unmanageable (Communism is good).
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves (already defined as Google) could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God (Eric Schmidt) as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral database inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God...er Eric, aka EES, to ourselves and to another human being (Probably in the IT Department) the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have EES remove all these defects of using another browser other then Chrome.
7. Humbly asked EES to remove our IE8 Beta installs.
8. Made a list of all persons we had pwnd, and became willing to make amends to them all (China's really working on this list too, really, honest).
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, buy supplying them with stolen credit card numbers and boxed copies of the English show "The IT Crowd" except when to do so would injure them or others, or if they already own it.
10. Continued to rewrite our personal inventory database and when we were wrong promptly debug it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with EES as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out that we will no longer "Do Any Evil" .
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other Chinese Internet Addicts and to practice these principles in all our affairs on our brand new Android equipped devices.
(disclaimer: I'm in REAL 12 step program - if you are too and don't see the humor in this, tough shit)
Haha! (Score:3, Funny)
6 hours a day?
L4|\/|3rz.
Thanks to virtualization, I spent 6 hours on the Internet in just the past 40 minutes!
Re:Bad term? (Score:1, Funny)
>unless there are marked differences in brain chemistry
How is that determined? I mean, do you check brain chemistry with a dipstick?
Re:Not addicted (Score:3, Funny)
I personally have no idea how office workers lived with themselves before the Internet existed. Sitting 8 hours in a cube pushing paper around was a way of life for millions of people for around a century. I would have to do a job that involved "outside" stimulus were it not for the Interbutts (not to mention having a totally different job).
Re:What did that say? (Score:2, Funny)
Their government did a good job dealing with that whole freedom of speech outbreak a while back too. Our government should learn from th
If we could just harness that anger! (Score:3, Funny)
hook ya up to a turbine or something.
Re:Wow work related injury here I come (Score:2, Funny)