MS Confirms Six Different Versions of Windows 7 758
darien writes "Microsoft has confirmed that Windows 7 will be offered in six different editions. In a seeming admission that the numerous versions of Vista were confusing to consumers, the company says that this time its marketing will focus on just two editions — 'Home Premium' and 'Professional.' But the reality is more complex, with different packages offering different subsets of the total range of Windows 7 features."
Obviously.... (Score:5, Funny)
Since Vista worked out so good for them they had to follow their 'success'. Seems like some people never learn.
Get your lawyers ready! (Score:5, Funny)
6 versions? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:6 versions? (Score:5, Funny)
I was expecting 7 versions to justify the names?? :-)
If that's how it works, Windows 2000 must have been a huge headache :-)
3 applications?! (Score:5, Funny)
Starter Edition: A lightweight version for netbook computers, that will only be capable of running three applications concurrently.
Great, so one of the slots will be used by your Virus scanner, another by the Spyware checker leaving you with one slot left to run an app of your choice!
Re:Obviously.... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Obviously.... (Score:5, Funny)
six nothing! BoingBoing has listed 20 new versions of Windows 7! [boingboing.net]. Just what I needed, Windows for Voting Machines, just right to make sure your favorite Republicrat gets elected!
Re:I'm sure this is a money thing... (Score:5, Funny)
I can see the ads allready : "there are 6 different versions, Collect them all ! "
Re:6 versions? (Score:5, Funny)
Nope. 6 x 7 = 42.
It's all making sense now.
Re:Original Sources (Score:5, Funny)
Which gives me pause and causes me to wonder ... are they really going to use the same marketing strategy they did with Vista?
Most likely. That 'strategy' is having the PC manufacturers preinstall it. That is how most normal people get Windows.
I am surprised that they didn't go with _7_ versions. They could have then called them Bashful, Doc, Dopey, Grumpy, Happy, Sleepy and Sneezy. Exercise to the reader to match them up with Starter, Home Basic, Home Premium, Professional, Enterprise, Ultimate, and Fully Cracked editions.
Re:Original Sources (Score:5, Funny)
but they know their business better than I do
Let's see...
"It's the guys who can touch us in multiple places that are Microsoft's top competitors rather than the guys who can touch us in any one place." -- Ballmer
"I want to squirt you a picture of my kids. You want to squirt me back a video of your vacation. That's a software experience." -- Ballmer
"I'm going to f****** kill Google." -- Ballmer
Er... maybe you actually DO know better.
Re:Original Sources (Score:5, Funny)
I am surprised that they didn't go with _7_ versions. They could have then called them Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy and Pride. Exercise to the reader to match them up with Starter, Home Basic, Home Premium, Professional, Enterprise, Ultimate, and Fully Cracked editions.
There, fixed that for you.
Re:Original Sources (Score:5, Funny)
Starter == Envy (== Bashful)
Home Basic == Wrath (== Grumpy)
Home Premium == Lust (== Dopey)
Professional == Pride (== Sleepy)
Enterprise == Greed (== Sneezy)
Ultimate == Gluttony (== Doc)
Fully Cracked == Sloth (== Happy)
Incidentally, this matchup shows that Windows is a sin no matter the form it takes.
All Features... (Score:2, Funny)
Since Ultimate will have all features, I hope it has the "only able to run three apps at once" feature from Starter.
Also, in Starter, does the idle process count as one of your three apps?
Re:Microsoft Is Ridiculous (Score:4, Funny)
So upon release, we could see TWENTY ONE different versions of 3 OSes floating around the IT world.
I know, it's a ridiculous situation. Thank heavens the free software world would never come up with something so pointless as a vast plethora of different versions of the same OS. :)
Re:Obviously.... (Score:4, Funny)
They could add a new help character patterned after clippy.
Tommy the Tomahawk cruise missile.
"Looks like you are planning on blowing something up today. How may I help?"
Re:Original Sources (Score:4, Funny)
And Cinderella as the Linux version?
Cinduntu?
Re:Obviously.... (Score:5, Funny)
Windows 7 Wall Street edition:
"The government is trying to stop you from giving yourself a big bonus. Cancel/Allow?"
Re:Obviously.... (Score:4, Funny)
The democrats have been using necromancy for decades to get undead vote, its all just balancing.
Re:Obviously.... (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Obviously.... (Score:4, Funny)
"Looks like you are planning on blowing something up today. How may I help?"
(operator inputs target)
"Estimated data download time: 1 hour. Would you like to watch McHale's Navy while you wait?"
Re:Obviously.... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Obviously.... (Score:5, Funny)
rant about how I despise the Fisher Price interface
Ever since being confronted with the Blue Start Menu for the first time, the first thing I've always done to any Windows box that I had to use was switch it to "Classic Mode".
Incidentally, I hear Windows 7 is taking out this feature. Fuck them for that. I want my boring gray menubars!
Re:Obviously.... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Original Sources (Score:1, Funny)
You forgot the modern americanized dwarves:
chunky, zippy, ugly, stinky, stiffy, twitchy and
bob.
Re:Why? (Score:3, Funny)
Windows Starter is quickly deleted and substituted for Pirated Ultimate in third world countries, so it's useless.
Sincerely,
A third world /. whiner (running Linux since 1999)
Re:3 versions needed only (Score:3, Funny)