Microsoft Rebrands Live Search As "Bing" 443
JacobSteelsmith writes "Microsoft is attempting to re-brand its Live Search, also known as Kumo. Bing, as it's known, is another attempt by Microsoft to lure consumers away from Internet search leaders such as Google. Microsoft has posted a quarterly loss in its online advertising business, compared to Google's sales, $4.7 billion in the first quarter. According to the Live Search blog, Bing goes 'beyond the traditional search engines to help you make faster, more informed decisions' by combining a 'great search engine' with organized results. It also adds unique tools to help the user make important decisions. It is being touted as a 'decision engine.'"
Hmmmm... (Score:5, Funny)
"Here, let me bing that for you."
Hmmmm... No.
Bing? Seriously? (Score:5, Funny)
We use the search engine that goes bing! (Score:5, Funny)
This has Monty Python written all over it.
Re:Hmmmm... (Score:5, Funny)
Here's the problem (Score:5, Funny)
They change the search engine's name in an effort to draw a crowd, then they fuck it up by weighing it down with language that's awful damn close to the infinitely-scalable enterprise class web 2.0 productivity enhancement solution corporatespeak that makes people roll their eyes.
My first thought... (Score:5, Funny)
Phil: "Ned? Ned Ryerson?"
Ned: "BING!"
But What If ... (Score:5, Funny)
Bing! Fries are done! Hmm. Progress, but still no dice...
True, however:
... thank god for bing."
Developer One: "You know that hot girl I met at the bar last night?"
Developer Two: "Yeah?"
Developer One: "I bing'd her."
Developer Two: "No way! What did you find?"
Developer One: "Bing says she's categorized as head of a right wing conservative group that attracts females and funnels money into Karl Rove."
Developer Two: "Ohhh, dude that sucks, maybe next time?"
Developer One: "Yeah
Re:Bing? Seriously? (Score:3, Funny)
"Have you tried looking underneath your belt?"
"Not that bong, Bob. The other bong."
B.I.N.G.? (Score:5, Funny)
Bing Is Not Google
Re:Bing? Seriously? (Score:5, Funny)
Yes, on a web site focused on FOSS the readership will now complain about the name selected by Microsoft for their search engine.
Some examples of the naming accumen of the FOSS crowd:
- Ogg Vorbis
- Gimp
- Apache
- IceWeasel
- Thunderbird
- X
- Gnome
- Prefacing thousands of KDE apps with K
- Gnu
- A thousand other recursive acronyms
- etc etc etc
Re:Bing? Seriously? (Score:2, Funny)
So what's the new branding going to be after this one fails? Bong?
Nah, I think it's going to be "Bang" so that sentences like this happen:
"I couldn't find the answer in my textbook so I Banged it."
Re:We use the search engine that goes bing! (Score:2, Funny)
Pinging bing.com [207.46.104.147] with 32 bytes of data:
Request timed out.
Request timed out.
Request timed out.
Request ti--look, User, this isn't pinging. A ping is a connected series of ICMP transmissions intended to verify a path between a server and a client. Pinging is an bidirectional process. This is just the automatic blackholing of any packet your client generates.
Bing! (Score:5, Funny)
Ned: Phil? Hey, Phil? Phil! Phil Connors? Phil Connors, I thought that was you!
Phil: Hi, how you doing? Thanks for watching.
[Starts to walk away]
Ned: Hey, hey! Now, don't you tell me you don't remember me because I sure as heckfire remember you.
Phil: Not a chance.
Ned: Ned... Ryerson. "Needlenose Ned"? "Ned the Head"? C'mon, buddy. Case Western High. Ned Ryerson: I did the whistling belly-button trick at the high school talent show? Bing! Ned Ryerson: got the shingles real bad senior year, almost didn't graduate? Bing, again. Ned Ryerson: I dated your sister Mary Pat a couple times until you told me not to anymore? Well?
Phil: Ned Ryerson?
Ned: Bing!
Phil: Bing.
Re:Bing? Seriously? (Score:5, Funny)
<VOICE type="Chandler Bing">
Could this branding be any more lame?
</VOICE>
Re:Bing? Seriously? (Score:3, Funny)
I went to google the answer, but this damn computer has the wrong search installed and my question went down the bung hole!
I love how the live desktop search tells you everything install chronologically after it is going to stop functioning if you remove the MS search. Well, maybe bung will finally let you find answers to technical issues half as well as google search - then MS might be able to bribe some more people to play with it's bung.
Re:Bing? Seriously? (Score:5, Funny)
It's just that (4) isn't clear.
Re:But What If ... (Score:4, Funny)
Can I have her number?
Re:Hmmmm... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:But What If ... (Score:4, Funny)
Uh, into what part of Karl Rove are they funneling that money? Sounds... unsanitary.
Re:But What If ... (Score:5, Funny)
How can you possibly imagine that such a phrase could mean "I searched the web for information on her?" "I bing'd her" can only mean "I banged her," "I nailed her," "I balled her lights out," etc.
Re:Bing? Seriously? (Score:3, Funny)
If "Bing" fails, the next name will be "Squirt".
But won't that confuse the 2 owners of a Zune who have been squirting songs to each other?
Re:B.I.N.G.? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Give up (Score:3, Funny)
Re:But What If ... (Score:1, Funny)
Re:organized results (Score:5, Funny)
Re:I think they might have someone (Score:5, Funny)
You forgot "~" at the end of first sentence.
Re:Bing? Seriously? (Score:2, Funny)
So what's the new branding going to be after this one fails? Bong?
Well, it would be popular with the stoner crowd..
Re:Bing? Seriously? (Score:2, Funny)
"Bob, where's my bong?" "Have you tried looking underneath your belt?" "Not that bong, Bob. The other bong."
Did you try binging your bong?
Re:Bing? Seriously? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:We use the search engine that goes bing! (Score:1, Funny)
Oh, what sad times are these when passing ruffians can say Bing at will to old ladies. There is a pestilence upon this land, nothing is sacred. Even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under considerable economic stress in this period in history.
Re:But What If ... (Score:5, Funny)
You can bing it.
Re:Hmmmm... (Score:4, Funny)
Actually, it's much better for you to bing than than to squirt anything from your Zune if you live in Quebec [macworld.co.uk].
Re:Hmmmm... (Score:5, Funny)
There, fixed that for you.
Re:But What If ... (Score:4, Funny)
No, it's bing, bong, then bang...
Re:But What If ... (Score:4, Funny)
Bing fathered my baby!
Re:Hmmmm... (Score:5, Funny)
A more apt name from Steve would have been "Fling" ... I'm thinking chairs here.
Re:My first thought... (Score:3, Funny)
They leveraged that to win the office suite market.
They actually have a pretty kickass office suite. If there's one thing Microsoft does 99% well, it's Office.