Where Does a Geek Find a Social Life? 1354
Posted
by
kdawson
from the meet-space dept.
from the meet-space dept.
JustShootMe writes "I have a question for my fellow Slashdotters, and yes, I realize I am entering the lion's den covered in tasty meat-flavored sauce. I have never been a very social person, preferring to throw myself into technology; therefore, I've been spectacularly unsuccessful in developing any meaningful interpersonal relationships. Lately I have begun to feel that this situation is not tenable, and I would like to fix it. But I really don't know how and haven't the faintest idea where to start. I know that I am in the minority and that there are many different kinds of Slashdot readers, most of whom have more experience in this realm than I do. So please tell me: how, and more importantly, where do you meet fellow geeks — preferably including some of the opposite gender — in meatspace?"
Go old school (Score:5, Funny)
Really? (Score:5, Funny)
You could start by not ASKING SLASHDOT...
CL (Score:5, Funny)
just wait for the revolution (Score:1, Funny)
and look for a wall
Get online! (Score:3, Funny)
You could also start by... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Learn to dance (Score:5, Funny)
International singles clubs, also.
Here in Silicon Valley, I met a lot of interesting women. Foreigners don't know you are a geek, they appreciate guys with a good salary, career prospects.
You learn all sorts of things, e.g. I met Dr. Wang, learned that she was a dentist. Observed that she had perfect teeth. Realized ALL dentists I had ever met had perfect teeth, form, fit and function. Decided my next girl-friend had to be a gynecologist.
Finally married a Russian. We fight about things I could never have conceived of previously, so life is not boring.
Where Does a Geek Find a Social Life? (Score:3, Funny)
Simple do what Bill Gates and Steve Jobs did.
1: Create a huge tech company
2: Engage Human Resources
3: Pick a girl out of company cafeteria line.
4: Have lots of kids right away.
5: PROFIT!!
Re:Learn to dance (Score:5, Funny)
Finally married a Russian. We fought about things I could never have conceived of previously, so life was not boring.
Past tense, Hans, past tense amigo.
Was Slashdot This Fucking Lame 10 Years Ago? (Score:5, Funny)
Perhaps it has been so long that it just seems like Slashdot use to be an actual site you could turn to every day and read a nice cross section of laypeople and industry experts discussing interesting technology topics.
Can't all these inane 'Ask Slashdot' - aka Please Give Me Attention!!! articles be done away with?
Just. Fucking. Google. It.
The Sims (Score:5, Funny)
If you try something and it fails, you can always reload from a previous saved game. If only real life were like that... "Wow, that didn't go over well. ctrl-z! ctrl-z!"
God (Score:3, Funny)
Meatspace? (Score:3, Funny)
Firstly, don't use terms like "meatspace" in, er, meatspace.
Re:Go old school (Score:5, Funny)
Re:When in doubt, volunteer (Score:5, Funny)
You want a friend? (Score:5, Funny)
Do stuff. (Score:3, Funny)
Flip on a TV. Watch some touchy-feely story and you'll inevitably see women doing all kinds of crap. Now, this is partly because the camera crew knows that they are easy on the eyes, but they're there.
If you're religious, even mildly, or even somewhat anti-religious, church is outstanding. Think about it from their point of view: making babies is the #1 means of recruitment.
If you like animals, you are set. Just go to your local animal shelter. If you're a little loopy, try PETA. Likewise, environmentalist groups are a dime a dozen and the less you know about the environment, the better.
If you're political, there are plenty of girls on both the right and left. I'd recommend sticking with campaigns for major candidates to avoid nutters, but if you're a nutter, go for it.
If you can teach _anything_ do that. People need job skills and fscking around with Office is a job skill. Volunteering at a local school is great; so many teachers are women that men actually benefit from affirmative action in the public school system.
If you can play an instrument, join a band. Avoid the drugs.
And even if you have absolutely no talent, you can always volunteer at a homeless shelter.
One caveat: go in with a plan. Say you'll stick with whatever you choose for a few months. If you don't meet anyone, try something else. Don't feel obligated to whoever you're volunteering with, and most of all, realize that wanting a relationship is a perfectly good reason to do this stuff.
get rich (Score:1, Funny)
You get rich off some geek shit and getting laid is easy from there. The rest comes with it.
How to be sexy by ESR (Score:5, Funny)
You really have to read this and have Google Images open elsewhere wtih pictures of ESR to appreciate the humour fully.
Re:Go and do what you love doing... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Was Slashdot This Fucking Lame 10 Years Ago? (Score:5, Funny)
Well you can't blame me. I at least feed em around here. Where are the other Slashdotters when it comes time to feed them? Walk them? Slap their little noses with rolled up posts when they get out of line??
Well?
It's a joint responsibility people....
Re:Really? (Score:5, Funny)
Agreed. Asking this question on Slashdot is like asking Helen Keller if your socks match.
Re:Go old school (Score:5, Funny)
(Looking online very, very rarely works, mostly because online spaces allow people to be totally dishonest. If there's no honest representation, you cannot find people by presupposing they are being honest.)
Sure you can.
Think about the kind of person you'd want. Then figure out the lie they'd tell about themselves in the personal section. Lie accordingly about yourself, and go from there.
Re:Go old school (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Go old school (Score:5, Funny)
2. Find a biker bar. A tough biker bar.
3. Enter, leap upon a countertop, and dance your nerdy heart out.
4. Once you wake up in Intensive Care Unit, try to pick up a sympathetic nurse.
BUN (Score:3, Funny)
Psst.
Basement Underground Network.
Babe Galore.
Follow the Cheetos trail.
You didn't hear it from me.
Re:Go old school (Score:2, Funny)
Fucking kids. We had BBS's back them (among other things).
Uh... I don't think that was legal even back then.
WalMart!! (Score:3, Funny)
Everything a woman can ever need is found at WalMart. Go to WalMart, you'll find women. Hang around the lingerie, and when some gal starts eyeing and fingering the frilly stuff, tell her how great it would look on her. Go for it. Yeah, you'll get slapped ten or fifty times - but the NEXT ONE is probably the girl of your dreams.
No balls, no glory. Of course, no balls, no girl either.
Re:God (Score:5, Funny)
I find rum gives me the same ability :)
Re:Where Does a Geek Find a Social Life? (Score:5, Funny)
Wait, I don't understand!
I can't follow that, what happened to ??? ?
It's a critical step and it's not there! *head explodes*
Re:Go old school (Score:5, Funny)
He said ~women~, not senior citizens ; )
Re:Learn to dance (Score:1, Funny)
So let me see if I have this right. I have to give up personal freedom, my pocketbook, and my sanity just to get cockteased by a sociopath who will end up with at least half my stuff? Nah. You're right. Women's Lib is the best thing that happened to us men. Taught us how to wash our own clothes and make our own food, rendering women essentially useless. Paying a hooker occasionally to take care of things sounds like a much better way to go.
err... (Score:3, Funny)
Geeks, social life, surely sir is joking?
Re:outdoors (Score:5, Funny)
I met a future girlfriend while mountain biking...
I think I know what you were trying to say (you met a girl while mountain biking who then later became your girlfriend) but the way you said it makes it sound like it was a time traveling bicycle or you're some creepy guy stalking her trying to make her love you.
Re:Really? (Score:5, Funny)
Agreed. Asking this question on Slashdot is like asking Helen Keller if your socks match.
Which works OK if your matching criteria are size and material. I don't think he's asking how to get to the interstate from here in Boston, he's asking how to get out of the garage.
Re:Really? (Score:1, Funny)
Except she is more likely to be right.
In Soviet Russia... (Score:0, Funny)
What a a country!11
Re:Learn to dance (Score:3, Funny)
You're a boy, right? OK, then go learn to dance.
What you think geeks don't get beaten up enough?
Re:Learn to dance (Score:2, Funny)
Worth a try no matter what. Better to strike out than be the ball boy stuck polishing the bat.
Is that what they're calling it these days?
Re:Was Slashdot This Fucking Lame 10 Years Ago? (Score:1, Funny)
OK ill take the joint, you take the responsibility .
Re:Motorcycles and/or horses.... (Score:2, Funny)
Repeat dates after you have used and killed her tend to cause complications in real life.
I realise that 'Cold Ethyl' never says no, but still dude....ehww!
Although if you set her up in interesting positions before rigor-mortise sets in....
Going to scrub my brain with bleach and a bottle-brush now....
Re:Oh, and another idea... (Score:5, Funny)
don't view non-geeks as "mundane". The "meatspace" will earn the "weird" label, but the "mundane" will earn the "motherfucking asshole" label, and justifiably so.
At least he did not call them muggles.....
Re:CL (Score:5, Funny)
Contrary to popular belief, CL is probably 99% scammers, bots, and hookers.
I'm married to a scam-bot hooker, you insensitive clod!
Re:Fellow geeks? (Score:3, Funny)
You're shaped like a cock?! I'd get that looked at.
Re:step one (Score:2, Funny)
It's the spot in your refrigerator where you keep your bacon.
Re:Where Does a Geek Find a Social Life? (Score:5, Funny)
On the other hand: getting a nice haircut, wearing 'normal' clothes and acting a bit more normal isn't going to hurt either.
Ugh. You mean go out among the mundanes wearing clean jeans and a t-shirt with some kind of pop-culture reference on it?
Do you have any IDEA what you're risking there?
The hell with that. If she doesn't get my "Is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me?" t-shirt, then I don't wanna know her.
Re:Go old school (Score:4, Funny)
Agreed - LARPs are good places to meet people who fall into the broad category of geekdom in my experience, and there's normally a good gender blend.
Min
On the downside, that gender blend consists entirely of LARPers. Let's be honest... LARPers are the furries of the gaming world.
Re:Try Church (Score:2, Funny)
Geek license suspended! (Score:3, Funny)
I was tempted to get her a copy of Outlook so we could schedule meetings.
Outlook!? Hand over your geek card. You'll get it back in two weeks, that'll give you some time to think about using such expensive lazy-ass solutions.
;-) )
(That should help you with the ladies, you can thank me later
Irony -1 (Score:3, Funny)
So says the man with an 8 digit UID
Re:Where Does a Geek Find a Social Life? (Score:4, Funny)
Everything was going so well until I found out she enjoys creating entirely flash-based websites.. *sob*
Re:Where Does a Geek Find a Social Life? (Score:3, Funny)
If she doesn't get my "Is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me?" t-shirt, then I don't wanna know her.
Wow... that's the best t-shirt idea I've ever come up with.
Re:Not a matter of where (Score:2, Funny)
I'd rather be alone than lower my standards that far.
Otherwise you'll end up like this guy: (Score:3, Funny)
It was last Friday. I had just gotten up from a SWEET game of Warcraft on my PC.
Anyway, I realized I was dangerously low on Mountain Dew, so I threw on my lucky green sweat pants and my trenchcoat to walk 3 blocks to the convenience store. I figured if I had enough change, I might even pick up some Slim Jims, but I digress...
On my way back to my apartment, Dew and Slim Jims in hand, I saw you and your friends walking into the Jazz club across the street. You seemed so comfortable and cool dressed to the nines for an evening of drinks and dancing with those closest to you.
It was then that I knew I had to meet you. Although I had never been in that particular establishment, I followed you in. You probably would have seen me, but I was slowed by an argument with the doorman over my attire. After a few minutes, I think I had him convinced I looked ok, but then he proceeded to ask me for $10 just to walk into the bar. I couldn't believe they wanted to charge me just to get in. I, of course had no money, having spent every spare cent on caffeine and sticks of processed beef. I walked back to the convenience store and failed in my effort to return the goods I had so recently purchased. Luckily, the store had an ATM, so I pleaded with the checker to hold my purchases behind the counter for a short time, and I withdrew $20 from the cash machine. Armed with my fresh $20 bill, I marched to the Jazz Club, paid the $10 cover, and went looking for the woman of my dreams.
I saw you immediately, near the bar with your friends. You were at the end of the group with some space next to you, so I settled in close. You noticed me once or twice as I cleared my throat nervously trying to think of what to say. It sounded like you may have commented on my trenchcoat to one of your friends, but I couldn't be sure.
I finally bumped you to get your attention. I may have bumped to hard as I noticed you spilled some of your drink on your shirt. Sorry about that.
ME: So... Do you come here often?
YOU: No. (you turn back to your friends)
ME: Me neither. I hate bars. I can't come to terms with why anyone would want to pay such high margins on watered down drinks they could make at home for a fraction of the cost... (I trail off noticing you aren't listening)
I regroup and lean in close to your ear...
ME: What are you drinking there?
YOU: (barely looking over your should back to me) A gin and tonic.
ME: Can I buy you one?
YOU: I already have one, see... (you hold up your drink sarcastically)
ME: Well then, can I reimburse you for the one you are drinking?
YOU: What? (looking at me now)
ME: Let me pay you back for that one.
YOU: Whatever. (looking puzzled and annoyed)
ME: How much was it?
YOU: What?
ME: How much is a gin and tonic?
YOU: Five dollars
ME: Jesus Christ! What fool pays $5 for a freakin' drink? That's robbery!!!
YOU: Get away from me.
ME: (embarrassed by my outburst) No, no, no. I said I'd pay you for it, so I will. (reaching in my pocket) Do you have change for a $10?
You: What?
ME: I only have a ten dollar bill? Do you have five dollars change?
YOU: (turning to face me completely and folding your arms as your friends quiet down to watch our interaction) Actually, this drink was $6 with tip.
ME: What?
YOU: My drink. It was $5 plus $1 for tip!
ME: Damn, this is getting expensive. Ok, do you have $4 change for my $10.
YOU: No.
ME: Well, then I'll have to get change from the bartender.
YOU: Don't bother. Leave me alone. (you turn back to your friends as they erupt in laughter)
I spend 10 mintues trying to get the bartender's attention. I can't blame him much because he was very busy serving so many other morons begging to be robbed of their hard earned dollars. When he finally gets to me,