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Security Technology

Crime Expert Backs Call For "License To Compute" 327

The Cable Guy writes to mention that Russel Smith, one of Australia's principal criminologists, is pushing for first-time computer users to be required to earn a license to browse the web. "The Australian Computer Society launched computer driver's licenses in 1999. It aimed to give users a basic level of competency before they started using PCs. But the growth in cybercrime has led to IT security experts such as Eugene Kaspersky to call for more formalized recognition of a user's identity so they can travel the net safely. Last week Dr. Smith sat in front of a Federal Government Inquiry into cybercrime and advised Australia's senior politicians on initiatives in train to fight cybercrime. He said that education was secondary to better technology solutions."
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Crime Expert Backs Call For "License To Compute"

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  • by Anonymous Coward on Friday August 28, 2009 @06:12PM (#29236973)

    Computers license YOU !

    Yours In Ulyanovsk,
    Kilgore Trout

  • Re:WTF? (Score:5, Funny)

    by Zen Hash ( 1619759 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @06:13PM (#29236993)

    How does letting THEM, know who I am, make ME safer?

    The same way painting your car red makes it go faster.

  • by Beardo the Bearded ( 321478 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @06:17PM (#29237039)

    Dear Australia:

    1. Get a hardware firewall and configure it properly.

    2. Don't open unexpected attachments, even if you're trying to help because those strata minutes must have been sent to you by mistake and you should read them to find out who to send them to.

    3. Don't click the banners.

    4. No, it's not true. Don't forward the email.

    5. If a computer asks you for information, lie.

    6. It's not your bank. It's NEVER your bank. It's also never paypal, amazon, your ISP, or the police.

    Love,
    1999.

  • Re:WTF? (Score:2, Funny)

    by gravos ( 912628 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @06:18PM (#29237049) Homepage
    Agreed. Look at these particularly stupid statements:

    (1) "devise technology that makes it difficult or impossible for people to be defrauded"

    So some sort of mind control/constraint device for people then? Ha, ha.

    (2) "At the moment we have drivers licences for cars, and cars are very dangerous machines. Computers are also quite dangerous"

    Haven't seen anyone run over by a computer recently. I wonder what is the death toll caused by poor "driving" of a computer these days?
  • Re:Nonsense (Score:5, Funny)

    by SL Baur ( 19540 ) <steve@xemacs.org> on Friday August 28, 2009 @06:27PM (#29237157) Homepage Journal

    Honestly I'd like to see them create separate tests for Linux, Mac and Windows

    That's hardly an inclusive list. I'm not going to bother reading the article, the idea of an internet license has been floated for a long time now, but they probably need to add smart phones too.

    If this actually makes sense (I do not think it does), the obvious next step is to require people to purchase internet insurance in case they get into an accident/install malware and spread SPAM or DDOS attacks.

    Sigh.

  • Re:WTF? (Score:5, Funny)

    by swanzilla ( 1458281 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @06:27PM (#29237159) Homepage

    Agreed. Look at these particularly stupid statements: (1) "devise technology that makes it difficult or impossible for people to be defrauded" So some sort of mind control/constraint device for people then? Ha, ha. (2) "At the moment we have drivers licences for cars, and cars are very dangerous machines. Computers are also quite dangerous" Haven't seen anyone run over by a computer recently. I wonder what is the death toll caused by poor "driving" of a computer these days?

    blatant plagiarizing is breathtakingly stupid
    ...from the comments in the origional story

    A duo of breathtakingly stupid statements: (1) "devise technology that makes it difficult or impossible for people to be defrauded" Oh right. So some sort of mind control/constraint device for people then? (2) "At the moment we have drivers licences for cars, and cars are very dangerous machines. Computers are also quite dangerous" Haven't seen anyone run over by a computer recently. What exactly is the death toll caused by poor "driving" of a computer these days?

    nice try though

  • Re:Nonsense (Score:3, Funny)

    by mysidia ( 191772 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @06:30PM (#29237191)

    Also, if you live in the US, and want to use a computer to connect to a .AU web site, you're going to have to fly all the way to Australia to take your computing test at the Australian Department of Electro Computers to get a license and therefore permission to access the australian interweb, otherwise you'll get a warning on your first offense, assessed a large escalating fine on your second, third, and fourth offenses, and finally, on your fifth offense, you will be required to mail your computer to the AU enforcement office for impoundment until you settle matters.

    This is clearly thinly-disguised proposal to bolster Australia's tourism industry, in light of the economic recession.

  • Re:Nonsense (Score:5, Funny)

    by mcpkaaos ( 449561 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @06:31PM (#29237203)

    Honestly I'd like to see them create separate tests for Linux, Mac and Windows cause one test does NOT apply to all three.

    Well, the real test with Linux is installing it. The real test with Windows is not having to reinstall it every few months. I've only used a Mac a handful of times, but I'd imagine the real test there is enduring the daily beatings for your lunch money.

    Okay, I tend to agree with you.

  • Re:Nonsense (Score:4, Funny)

    by mysidia ( 191772 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @06:36PM (#29237239)

    I expect Linux and Mac users probably require a special "UNIX" endorsment on their license to run a real OS, like large truck drivers need.

    iPhone and similar mobile devices (with mobile browsers) need a license similar to what one needs to legally operate a motorcycle.

    This could cause a resurgence in simpler phone devices, they'd have a niche market for people who don't want to pay the fees for a special license to operate a web browser on a phone.

    Also, don't forget, these licenses only last 4 years, they contain a picture, and can only be renewed online once every other time.

    So every 8 years, you have to go back to the Department of Electrocomputers and wait in line for 2 or 3 hours to get your renewal, as well as your typing skills (WPM) test.

  • by martas ( 1439879 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @06:51PM (#29237441)
    Experts have called for the introduction of a mandatory license for ownership of Dihydrogen Monoxide [dhmo.org], citing its common usage in the illegal manufacturing of most controlled substances.
  • Re:WTF? (Score:3, Funny)

    by Chris Mattern ( 191822 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @07:18PM (#29237703)

    So you're saying it only works if you're an Ork, then.

  • by nnnnnnn ( 1611817 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @07:20PM (#29237723)

    Dear Sir,

    REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP

    First, I must solicit your strictest confidence in this transaction. This is by virtue of its nature as being utterly confidential and 'top secret'. You have been recommended by an associate who assured me in confidence of your ability and reliability to prosecute a transaction of great magnitudeinvolving a pending business transaction requiring maximum confidence. We are top officials of the Federal Government Contract Review Panel who are interested in importation of goods into our country with funds which are presently trapped in Nigeria. In order to commence this business we solicit your assistance to enable us transfer into your account the said trapped funds.

    The source of this fund is as follows: During the last Military Regime here in Nigeria, the Government officials set up companies and awarded themselves contracts which were grossly over- invoiced in various ministries. The present government set up a Contract Review Panel and we have identified a lot of inflated contract funds which are presently floating in the Central Bank Of Nigeria ready for payment. However, by virtue of our position as civil servants and members of this panel, we cannot acquire this money in our names. I have therefore, been delegated by my other colleagues in the panel to look for an overseas partner into whose account we would transfer the sum of US$21,500,000.00 [Twenty-One Million, Five Hundred Thousand U.S Dollars]

    Hence we are writing you this letter.

    We have agreed to share the money thus:

    1. 20% for the account owner you

    2. 70% for us [ Myself and other members of my panel ]

    3. 10% to be used in settling taxation and all local and foreign expenses direct or incidental to the execution of this transaction.

    It is from the 70% that we wish to commence the importation business. Please, note that this transaction is 100% safe and we hope to commence the transfer latest Ten (10) banking days from the date of the receipt of the following information, company's name, Address, Telephone and Fax number.

    The above information will enable us write letters of claim and job description respectively. This way we will use your company's name to apply for payment and re-award the contract in your company's name. We are looking forward to doing this business with you and solicit your confidentiality in this transaction.

    Please acknowledge the receipt of this letter using the above Email address.

    I will bring you into the complete picture of this pending project when I have heard from you.

    Remember this is a Deal so treat with utmost confidentiality.

                    Yours faithfully,

                    DR. YABRIL OMOTAYO
  • Re:Nonsense (Score:5, Funny)

    by TheRaven64 ( 641858 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @07:26PM (#29237763) Journal
    We Mac users don't have 'lunch money'. Carrying cash is far below us, and we wouldn't dream of any meal as pedestrian as 'lunch'. We live mainly on a diet of coffee (real coffee, not the plebeian Starbucks imitation that Windows-users drink or [shudder] instant coffee). When we dine, we do so lavishly, at the expense of others.
  • Re:Nonsense (Score:5, Funny)

    by CannonballHead ( 842625 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @07:48PM (#29237947)
    What can you do on Linux that can't be done in windows?
    Make fun of the Windows users from the high vantage point of a Linux user?
  • Re:WTF? (Score:3, Funny)

    by NotQuiteReal ( 608241 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @08:15PM (#29238181) Journal
    Heh. With apologies to Maslow, but I prefer to think of certain folks as working with nothing but screwdrivers all day, rather than hammers. So...

    If the only tool you have is a screwdriver, everything looks like it needs to be screwed.

    And the irony is how many screws are still loose.
  • Re:WTF? (Score:4, Funny)

    by sootman ( 158191 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @08:37PM (#29238347) Homepage Journal

    Well, since Slashdot has gotten better about not posting so many dupes, people have to look somewhere other than yesterday's posting of the same story for highly-rated comments.

  • Re:WTF? (Score:5, Funny)

    by fooslacker ( 961470 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @09:06PM (#29238543)
    In fairness there's no way he could have known that another Slashdotter would actually read the story...that's like a million to one against.
  • Re:WTF? (Score:2, Funny)

    by Kulfaangaren! ( 1294552 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @09:39PM (#29238697)
    That is only true if Steve Jobs has been hired to do the painting, only he wields the power of bending the reality to his will.
  • Re:WTF? (Score:3, Funny)

    by Arthur Grumbine ( 1086397 ) on Friday August 28, 2009 @10:54PM (#29239129) Journal

    $OTHER_PARTY is ruining the country.

    Mod parent up! Those fuckers have been in control of both houses and the presidency for over 150 years!

  • wow (Score:2, Funny)

    by kregg ( 1619907 ) on Saturday August 29, 2009 @05:30AM (#29240973)
    I want to be on what ever this guy is on. As an alternative, people could stop using Windows Bot.NET

He has not acquired a fortune; the fortune has acquired him. -- Bion

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