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Website Sells Pubic Lice 319
A British website called crabrevenge.com will help you prove that there is literally nothing you can't find online by selling you pubic lice. A disclaimer on the site says the creators "do not endorse giving people lice," and the lice are for "novelty purposes only." The company also boasts about a facility "where we do all of our parasite husbandry and carefully considered selective breeding." Three different packages are available: "Green package - One colony that can lay as many as 30 eggs for about $20. Blue package - Three colonies to share with your friends or freeze a batch or two for about $35. Red package - A vial of 'shampoo-resistant F-strain crabs' which can take up to two weeks to kill for about $52."
this isnt the 70's (Score:5, Funny)
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Really depends on the crowd. 6-7 years ago the shaving fetish hit like crazy and you'd have to search to the ends of the Earth (ok, honestly, you'd probably be safe once you hit Mexico) to find a girl with some bush, but it's come back into style in the last year or two. Not universally, but a lot more girls are sporting bush than there was previously. Can't say that's a bad thing either.
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Oh great....I'm sure every average Slashdotter has seen thousands of vaginas, and is able to correctly discern what "vagina styling" is in vogue at any given moment.
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I am going to offer you two pills, take the blue pill and you wake up tomorrow still thinking slashdotters aren't seeing thousands of vaginas. Take the red pill and you turn of the safe search filter on google and you type in "teen pussy" and within a single day you see over a thousand "rabbit holes" and exactly how deep they go.
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Not universally, but a lot more girls are sporting bush than there was previously.
I haven't seen one since '98. If it's coming back into stile, it seems nobody's bothered to tell the women ....
Re:this isnt the 70's (Score:5, Funny)
Discussion of female grooming habits is one thing, but there are too many comments here from dudes about their own "manscaping". If Slashdot is going to have an "Informative" tag which mods posts up... then there should also be a "Too Much Informative" tag which mods posts down.
Re:this isnt the 70's (Score:4, Informative)
"Everyone i know shaves so I don't see how effective this would be."
Everyone you know? How/Why do you know this...? Of all the people I know, aside from my wife, I know exactly ZERO (0) % about their personal grooming down pubic region. Why in the world would you know this in your circle?
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Well I completely shave, as does my wife, so I guess I'm a little weird then. Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever been with a woman that hasn't been completely shaved. Also I'm sure it's fairly common amongst gay guys, too.
Re:this isnt the 70's (Score:4, Funny)
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Re:this isnt the 70's (Score:5, Funny)
Well, much better than in the 70's. Ever seen much of that 70's pr0n??
Man...if you were gonna go 'spelunking' down there back in the day, you'd better have taken a machete, a couple of lanterns and a pack mule!! That bush was THICK.
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Re:this isnt the 70's (Score:5, Funny)
Gah. I do not get this at all.
I can dig a little grooming, but what is the point of mimicking prepubescent hair growth patterns?
"Trimming the bush makes the tree look taller." -- Richard Simmons
Re:this isnt the 70's (Score:4, Funny)
If she has a tree you're doing it wrong. Very wrong.
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Copy/pasting from wikipedia:
Fashion, Religion, Tradition, Sexual practice, Tactile sensation, Appearance, Discomfort, Personal taste.
Plenty of valid reasons there. Yours is a closet pedo argument if ever there was one.
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Gah. I do not get this at all. I can dig a little grooming, but what is the point of mimicking prepubescent hair growth patterns?
I know what you mean. That's why I only ever date women whose legs and armpits are at least as hairy as mine.
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I agree. An adult vulva, waxed smooth, does not resemble a kid's.
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I don't know if I agree, which is due to the fact, I can't make a comparison. I have seen plenty of shaved snatch thanks to the Internet (dear God thank you for the Internet soooooo much), but I have yet to see a 10 year old girls snatch. Don't plan on it either.
So yeah... as far as I know, they are exactly the same.
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Re:this isnt the 70's (Score:4, Informative)
your tired response is tired.
There's a substantial difference between a shaved 30yo woman, and a pre-pubescent girl. Stating the obvious shouldn't normally be necessary, except when dealing with tired old responses like yours. The shape of a woman changes, they develop a pair of things called "breasts," and also something called "hips." Baby fat goes away. Etc, etc. But I guess if you're just focused on pubic hair, and that's what makes/breaks a woman for you, hey.
If a 30yo woman has a gigantic bush but still has the mindset of a 10yo, hopefully that would be more of a turnoff for you than if the same woman shaved, and started acting like a 30yo. There are benefits to grooming. Cutting to merely /short/ is too much work, and is uncomfortable.
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Re:this isnt the 70's (Score:4, Funny)
Maybe it's just me, but I'd rather my women didn't remind me of prepubescent girls......
So stop picking up midgets.
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How to get rid of crabs. (Score:5, Funny)
Shave on one side. Douse the other side with lighter fluid. Light the fluid and stab the crabs with a tooth pick when they run to the other side.
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From an old Eddie Murphy routine:
Rub salt into your pubes and the crabs will go insane from thirst. Then just go wading. Naked.
(OK - Murphy's delivery was better...)
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Well I completely shave, as does my wife, so I guess I'm a little weird then. Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever been with a woman that hasn't been completely shaved. Also I'm sure it's fairly common amongst other gay guys, too.
So, you're admitting you're gay? Am I correct in concluding that you're the pitcher and your "wife" is the catcher =P?
Besides the fact (and more importantly) that he did not put the word "other" in his sentence, who cares?
Or perhaps you were hoping for his number?
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So, you're admitting you're gay? Am I correct in concluding that you're the pitcher and your "wife" is the catcher =P?
Besides the fact (and more importantly) that he did not put the word "other" in his sentence, who cares?
I hear the GNAA recruits...
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I think he means that he shaves and walked in on his mom last week when she was shaving.
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Sea Monkeys!
I got ants in my pants, and I need to dance!
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But tweezing is more fun for us masochists.
Re:this isnt the 70's (Score:4, Funny)
Stop lying nerds, you haven't probably even seen your own pubic hair in years.
Sure I have. Your mom never bothers to pick it out of her teeth.
Greeat (Score:5, Interesting)
They are breeding resistant strains of lice. Does this count as parasite warfare?
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Remember, you can always fight back in creative ways. I've heard chicken flied lice tastes good.
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I've heard chicken flied lice tastes good
It's fried rice you plick!
And what are they feeding the lice on ? (Score:2, Insightful)
Re:And what are they feeding the lice on ? (Score:5, Funny)
I'm not the pope, but I'm going to have to put "intentionally giving people crabs" in the unethical column.
But fun and rewarding? Totally different column.
Re:And what are they feeding the lice on ? (Score:5, Insightful)
I'm not the pope, but I'm going to have to put "intentionally giving people crabs" in the unethical column.
Since when is the Pope an authority on ethics?
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Some people actually believe that he's the final Earthly authority.
I believe Papal Infallibility [wikipedia.org] is inherent to Catholic doctrine.
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Re:And what are they feeding the lice on ? (Score:5, Funny)
Holy shit! You mean, that wasn't a "to do" list?
No sex before serving in the military? (Score:5, Funny)
So is the prohibition on divorce, pre-martial sex and birth control...
Well, that sure explains why the Crusades were all the rage back when Popes ruled the world...
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What's scary is the last sentence of TFA:
this website isn't the only one that offers pubic lice for revenge. There's also revengecrabs.com, which says "watching them itch and burn is half the fun."
So there are multiple websites dedicated to selling pubic lice.
I'm normally a laissez-faire kind of guy, but seriously... what do we need to do to get this shit shut down?
Re:And what are they feeding the lice on ? (Score:5, Insightful)
Regulations. Laws. Common sense. Morality. A clue. The ability to live with being a hypocrite.
All of the things that "laissez-faire" economics usually figures the market will resolve for itself, and yet is completely incapable of fixing -- because it assumes benign, rational humans who make good choices, and an underlying mechanism where things like murder for hire, arms dealers, bioterrorists, and asshats can't happen. It totally ignores human nature, and the fact that people aren't always nice, and don't always give a shit about the welfare of others.
This is the logical result of laissez-faire capitalism -- basically, anarchy. Only in anarchy, someone's ability to hunt you down and kill you regulates the system. As soon as you have any concept of law, to not think you need to apply that to your economic system is just plain stupid. Because someone is going to try to fuck someone else over.
You simply can't be a strict laisez-faire guy and believe that you have any right to shut this kind of thing down -- well, I guess you could hire someone to kill them, but that might be a little extreme.
Everyone likes to think this so called "free market" is inherently moral and will arrive at "good" and "just" decisions, when in fact, it's inherently amoral. It doesn't give a shit -- if people are willing to pay for it, it must be inherently good.
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Yes, I remember the last time I got a substantial judgment when a murderer-for-hire killed me.
Dumbass.
Re:And what are they feeding the lice on ? (Score:4, Insightful)
But it's poorly thought out and misses the main issue, despite using a lot of buzzwords. Its answer is basically that since buying lice only results in harm when they are used against someone, it should be okay to sell the lice and that nobody should be stopped unless they try to use them on another person.
That's sounds okay as a theory, but the fact is that pretty much the only use of buying lice is to hurt someone. Yeah, there may be one or two people who have some non-injurious purpose for buying lice, but that's a vanishingly small proportion of all the purchases (and doubly so when the site itself claims the lice are for revenge). Yet the free market solution is to just ignore that and allow that vanishingly small percentage to justify letting it be legal to sell lice.
If your free market theory can't handle the concept of "this product is almost always used to violate someone's rights, so we should crack down on it if we can, even though the person selling the product is not himself the one violating the rights", then the free market sucks and we need something else. And it doesn't apply to just selling lice, but to selling plague bacteria and lots of other things.
That's just wrong on so many levels. (Score:5, Insightful)
That's just wrong on so many levels. I can see kids buying these and then using them to pick on other school kids they don't like. Such as putting them in some kid's underwear when he/she is showering after the gym class.
This type of item used as a gag gift could have serious consequences for the recipient. If it's a student who is the recipient, then schools kick them out until they're free and clear. Parents may miss work to be home with student. Lice spread easily.
There is absolutely nothing good from this. /facepalm
Re:That's just wrong on so many levels. (Score:4, Funny)
That's just wrong on so many levels. I can see kids buying these and then using them to pick on other school kids they don't like. Such as putting them in some kid's underwear when he/she is showering after the gym class.
-1 questionable segue into children's locker room
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Now, I understand that public schools check for head lice, but I really didn't understand that they were checking for PUBIC lice.
I think I'll have to have a talk with my 8-year olds Principal.
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I really didn't understand that they were checking for PUBIC lice.
It's how they make sure the kids are presentable for their class pictures.
Re:That's just wrong on so many levels. (Score:5, Funny)
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Wait... teachers are checking student's pubic hair for lice now?!?
Next up: AIDS! (Score:3, Insightful)
You too can have your own strain of the HIV virus! Play jokes on your friends!
Uhoh, whoes got AIDS today? Everyone!
A lifetime of hilarity!
Great Britain... (Score:2)
For the longest time I thought Monty Python was a parody.
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I think this falls into the "life being stranger than art" category.
taking the fun out (Score:5, Funny)
Hookers.
Bioterrorism? (Score:2, Insightful)
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Bioterrorism is doubtful. But, criminal mischief, assault and battery, malicious wounding, and who knows what other laws it might fall under.
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Given that anything bigger than a firecracker can get you a WMD charge these days, probably.
I remember back in the day when WMDs were real WMDS. City-killers. Weapons of genocide. Now it's anything that goes boom. So with the modern usage, there were WMDs in Iraq.
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I think you'd have to be really creative to turn this into an act of terrorism. Not every act of assault or attempted battery is automatically terrorism, even if you use a creative weapon.
Spreading them in lingerie stores as a protest against licentiousness might qualify.
Must be Lords of Acid fans methinks (Score:2)
What's next, needles full of AIDS-infected blood?
Other parasites? (Score:2)
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Not that I'm aware of, but you can buy hookworm [autoimmunetherapies.com] to treat your asthma or other autoimmune disorders. Costs a few grand, or you can always get it from the source [kuro5hin.org].
Awful website. (Score:2)
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Drop Shop (Score:2)
Come on, cut these guys some slack already. (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Come on, cut these guys some slack already. (Score:4, Funny)
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Are you talking about some draconian lice-ensing scheme?
Man, I must be new around here. I'll get me coat, and I'll be mindful of the lawn.
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SOLD! (Score:2, Funny)
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And you know this how?
I'm worried for my kindsmen.
My favorite testimonial (Score:5, Funny)
Ryan - Hamilton
Wow...just.... wow..
This should be illegal unless the lice are sterile (Score:5, Insightful)
Willfully spreading a contagious illness (which this qualifies as) should be illegal.
I would say that creating ANY resistant, contagious disease should be considered a crime against humanity in general and should be rewarded with a swift death.
Contagious disease is a GREAT way to inflict misery on a lot of unintended and innocent victims.
Honestly, I can think of no worse or more dangerous crime.
--PM
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Honestly, I can think of no worse or more dangerous crime.
Bend over... Another bailout is coming (got you! heh heh)
Re:This should be illegal unless the lice are ster (Score:4, Insightful)
A police officer manipulating evidence for pecuniary gain while his target spends years in jail, his finances, family, and anus in tatters?
No.30 on your list?
The Texas judge who sent hundreds of youth to a private jail, of which he had financial interest in. Those convictions being over turned long after his ruse was tumbled? No.99? Perhaps not even in your top 100?
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its one thing to sneeze, its another to order samples of a disease from a web site and purposefully infect people.
Houston, we have a problem (Score:2)
"Make that bitch itch," the website says. "We sell you crabs to give your ex-girlfriend or whoever has pissed you off enough to make you seek revenge on them. If you want a method of revenge that doesn't involve permanent damage or risk of personal injury or jail time, you have come to the right place."
So when/if I do incur jail time, what kind of countersuit could I claim??
RIAA may object (Score:2)
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You would think the patent attorneys themselves would recognize the prior art involved.
Kids these days (Score:5, Funny)
I'm tellin' ya, this country it going to hell in a handbasket. Buying crabs? Sheesh. In my day we got our crabs for free at a Grateful Dead show.
Now, get off my lawn.
Commerce (Score:2)
PhRMA says pubic lice theft exceeded $51B in 2009.
Dead before they arrive (Score:3, Informative)
Lice are not very good at surviving without food (= blood). Half of them have died within 24 hours. A bedbug would be much better, because they can go for months without food and they are very difficult to get rid off, once you get them in your house.
I am just FASCINATED by this thread! (Score:2)
As a man in my early forties (married and faithful to one woman since 1999), I have to say this thread is an eye opener. I never even considered that there was a fad of almost-baldness a few years ago, but female bush is making a comeback.
I guess everything DID change after 9/11!
I wonder how many successful businessmen bed younger women, thinking something like "well, I don't look or act like I'm in my fifties", without knowing (without even knowing to know) that their junk adornment is as fashionable as a
IAAL but IANACL (But here's my view) (Score:4, Informative)
To be clear, I'm not a criminal lawyer. Crime is far, far away from my specialism. I am also not your lawyer. This is not a researched opinion. Cheers.
This would absolutely (in my opinion) be a criminal offence in the jurisdiction.
Common assault - includes any non-consensual contact or the causing of non-consensual contact through another object. This could easily be analogised to the cases involving leaving a trap or poking with a stick.
Much more serious:
Sexual assault - SOA 2003 s(3) - AFAIK this includes touching through another object, so the offense would be available
Infliction of GBH with intent - GBH requires common assault (see above) and the rupturing of membranes, which lice do when they suck blood (this potentially hold a sentence of lifetime imprisonment, and is an extraordinarily serious offence in the UK)
The Crown Prosecution Service generally charges less than the most serious crime chargeable, but it is quite feasible to imagine an assault or sexual assault charge being made if this were used. Also, the site owners are doubtless on the hook for all sorts of conspiracy and assistance offences, but I know little to nothing about them. Also, this may well come under the remit of Operation Sapphire (the London police operation on rape and sexual offences. I know some of the outstanding officers involved, they're like dogs with a bone once they get a suspect in their sights.) or could be viewed as domestic violence, which elevates sentencing in the courts (and opens up the possibility of elevation to Crown Court sentencing).
All sorts of wonderful civil options even if the CPS didn't prosecute, with trespass against the person and negligence high on the list.
Revenge on your ex? (Score:2)
That doesn't sound like a bright plan. Girls talk. About embarrassing yucky stuff. Do this and the probability of getting it on with her hot friend drops to zero. :(
(Admittedly, that may not be much of a drop, in which case the revenge may well be worth it... the math is left as an exercise for the reader.)
Re:Is this "news for nerds" or "stuff that matters (Score:4, Funny)
in Soviet Russia, do pubic lice sell websites?
They tried that, but found that the market just wasn't very profitable. Then they moved on to selling bulk emailing services, and found that it made a lot more money.
Re:Is this "news for nerds" or "stuff that matters (Score:4, Funny)
damn parasites!
Re:Is this "news for nerds" or "stuff that matters (Score:5, Funny)
Agreed: It's a lousy story.
Re:Is this "news for nerds" or "stuff that matters (Score:4, Funny)
News For Dummies, Stuff That's Dumb (Score:2)
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From the website:
We have state of the art delivery systems for crabs. Our methods vary from the spy like to the bizaar. Get cut-off in traffic, no problem, just freeze some of the eggs in a bit of water, then toss the egg laden icecube into the passing vehicle, preferably on the drivers lap. Other methods, slingshot waterballoon delivery. And our personal fave, the bottle of body wash that has tons of fertilized eggs waiting inside to hatch. Order today. Pay-pal, and Visa accepted
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Contaminate the falafels closest to his studio.
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