Southwest Adds 'Mechanical Difficulties' To Act Of God List 223
War, earthquakes, and broken washers are all unavoidable events for which a carrier should not be liable if travel is delayed according to Southwest Airlines. Southwest quietly updated their act of God list a few weeks ago to include mechanical problems with the other horrors of an angry travel god. From the article: "Robert Mann, an airline industry analyst based in Port Washington, NY, called it 'surprising' that Southwest, which has a reputation for stellar customer service, would make a change that puts passengers at a legal disadvantage if an aircraft breakdown delays their travel. Keeping a fleet mechanically sound 'is certainly within the control of any airline,' Mann said. 'Putting mechanical issues in the same category as an act of God — I don't think that's what God intended.'"
Check their payroll (Score:5, Funny)
If 'mechanical difficulties' has been added... (Score:4, Funny)
Re:I think they're right (Score:4, Funny)
You know those belts don't indicate actual martial arts skill, right?
Sorry, but SWA can PROVE this is valid. (Score:5, Funny)
If god chooses not to listen, should SWA be held liable?
Yay, free auto repair (Score:2, Funny)
By this logic my insurance company should be liable for when my car breaks down. Woohoo!
God Does Not Roll Dice... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:It only makes sense (Score:4, Funny)
You don't think an angry sky wizard could burn out a transistor?
Maybe the pilot and copilot are gay lovers, or maybe they had shrimp for lunch, or failed to say the correct prayers at the correct times, it seems from the relevant documentation anything pisses off those types.
Re:Mechanical failure (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Check their payroll (Score:5, Funny)
I don't know, have you seen the latest security measures?
"Thou shalt not bring liquids over 3 oz in thine carry-on luggage, for it is an abomination and potentially a bomb (anation).
Thou shalt remove thine shoes from thine feet, for thee art in a place of holy security, and also we want it to look like we learned something from that shoe bomber incident.
Thou shalt not bring hammers onto the plane, for in the face of a terrorist wielding a hammer all are paralyzed with fear and would not be able to stop him from hammering out the windows and depressurizing the cabin, causing extreme discomfort for all therein.
Thou shalt not question TSA rules, for they keep you safe so long as terrorists continue to be inconceivably stupid and incapable of lighting the bombs they hath smuggled aboard the airplane"
Pretty sure God works for TSA and doesn't take his job very seriously.
Re:I think they're right (Score:5, Funny)
>> Statistics should be considered an "Act of God".
So should arriving on time with all you luggage intact.
it's called (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Yay, free auto repair (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Check their payroll (Score:4, Funny)
He should be since all thier mechanics pray to him before every take off.
Re:If 'mechanical difficulties' has been added... (Score:4, Funny)
Re:It only makes sense (Score:3, Funny)
Exceptions for acts of god makes sense. After all, should an airline be held responsible for the unknowable, infallible actions of our omnipotent creator?
Of course, they want notarized proof if your sick and need to change planes. I want Southwest to get a note from God that He authorized the act. Also, a xeroxed copy of His driver's license or passport proving His identity. And His signature, which must match the signature card from a local bank.
Also, I want to know why He keeps making the Yankees win.
8 year olds, Dude. (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Check their payroll (Score:5, Funny)
"First shalt thou take out the Holy ziploc bag, then shalt thou count to three ounces, no more, no less. Three shall be the number of ounces, and the number ounces shall be three. Four ounces shalt thou not bring, neither thou two ziploc bags, excepting that thou then proceed to check one. Five ounces is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then handest thou thy Holy ziploc bag to thy TSA screener, who being arbitrary in My sight, shall confiscate it anyway."
Re:It only makes sense (Score:2, Funny)
Also, I want to know why He keeps making the Yankees win.
Pretty sure that was the other guy.