TSA To Make Pat-Downs More Embarrassing To Encourage Scanner Use 642
Jeffrey Goldberg writes for the Atlantic about his recent experiences with opting out of the back-scatter full-body scanners now being used to screen airport travelers. Passengers can choose to submit to a pat-down instead of going through the scanners, but according to one of the TSA employees Goldberg talked to, the rules for those are soon changing to make things more uncomfortable for opt-outs, while not doing much for actual security. He writes, 'The pat-down, while more effective than previous pat-downs, will not stop dedicated and clever terrorists from smuggling on board small weapons or explosives. When I served as a military policeman in an Israeli army prison, many of the prisoners 'bangled' contraband up their a**es. I know this not because I checked, but because eventually they told me this when I asked. ... the effectiveness of pat-downs does not matter very much, because the obvious goal of the TSA is to make the pat-down embarrassing enough for the average passenger that the vast majority of people will choose high-tech humiliation over the low-tech ball check."
first pat (Score:4, Funny)
first pat
Re:Pat down, or molest? (Score:3, Funny)
The pat down stops all those nasty terrorists, of course! It's also done by people you can definitely trust.
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:5, Funny)
I'm lactose intolerant. I'll be sure to drink a glass of milk with my garlic eggs in the morning and make the experience a real unpleasant one for them. "Oops, sorry, when you hit the 'resistance' it caused me to jump and I let some gas out."
Believe me, the TSA employees will revolt against upper management if enough people fart in their face all fucking day long. You want to play fucking games, we'll play them right back.
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:5, Funny)
Those who would give up essential liberty for a little ball rubbing action, deserve neither.
Re:I would opt-out, reluctantly (Score:2, Funny)
I would opt for the pat-down provided the person checking me is not gay. Considering how seriously homo-phobic (most) men are, he hopefully won't be too thorough.
After the pat down, I plan on asking - rather loudly - for a cigarette and if it's appropriate to tip for more "stringent" searches.
Re:I continue to find it appalling... (Score:4, Funny)
This is reasonable (Score:4, Funny)
But I expect a refund if the plane blows up. Is that fair?
Re:Cough, please ... (Score:4, Funny)
Also in the news:
Nobody will ever use the scanner in San Francisco.
It is time to find another solution (Score:3, Funny)
Whether it is sanctioned sexual molestation ( pat downs ) or getting nuked with scanner radiation Americans didn't cause this problem and we do deserve to be treated this way. It is time to find another solution.
A start might be to make the scanning more palatable by hiring higher caliber people for security and giving them training in how to act and be more mature about the process. Their behavior and comments started many of the objections with scanning.
Not a problem. (Score:2, Funny)
Comment removed (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:5, Funny)
No doubt there's some secret law saying you're not allowed to enjoy your ball check.
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:5, Funny)
That's un-Amurican.
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:1, Funny)
Wouldn't it be:
"Those who would give up essential liberty for a little genital comfort, deserve neither."?
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:2, Funny)
mod parent "+! Fabulous"
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:5, Funny)
Turned out that he had been given a grilling by the Customs goons, and they had strip-searched him. However, one of them took just a sniff of his shoes, looked at his colleague and said "if that's what these things smell like, there's no way I'm looking up this guy's ass".
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:3, Funny)
"Those who would give up essential liberty for a little ball rubbing action, deserve neither."
Submission, frottage, AND denial?
I, for one, find the idea vaguely arousing.
Re:Precedence for this (Score:3, Funny)
Sounds like something you should cry out just as the TSA dude's hands touch your jewels.
Re:Maybe a solution? (Score:2, Funny)
Erection (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Wanna check my balls? (Score:3, Funny)
Hi, i see that you live in Perth, i am going there for christmas and would like to know what are the best computer stores, cellphone stores and such, can i contact you by email? I don't see a place in your profile to do that. My gmail address is fj-leon without the dash. Thanks
Re:Erection (Score:5, Funny)
If I say I'm gay can I insist on having a female TSA hottie?