AI Reality Check In Online Dating 192
mikejuk writes "Researchers have developed an online dating system that not only matches you with partners you'll find attractive, but who are also likely to find you attractive too. The researchers at the University of Iowa have addressed an underlying problem of online dating sites. There's no doubt that such sites are ever increasing in popularity, and have good algorithms taking into account the reported likes, interests and hobbies of the person looking for a partner to come up with a potential match. What's less well catered for is the trickier aspect of the reciprocal interest – you may think person x looks nice, but will they find you equally attractive? The problem here is that if you are Average Joe and try asking out Supermodels Ann, Barbara and Cheryl, you're unlikely to get a reply. Well, not a printable one, anyway. So coming up with yet another supermodel for you to sob over isn't a lot of help.Instead, the researchers add a note of reality by analyzing the replies you get, and use this to work out how attractive you are. This is a scary thought for many of us, and one we may well not want an honest answer to. The results are used to recommend people who might actually reply if you get in contact with them. Fortunately for the attractively challenged, the research is still just that – research. However, given the fact the online dating market is worth around $3 billion a year, chances are someone is going to make use of this. We have been warned."
wait (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Surprised people still use... (Score:5, Insightful)
I've used online dating sites, and found them quite effective. My girlfriend of over 2 years and I met on an online site. A close friend of mine met his wife on an online site. So, they do actually work.
I remember when I gave that idea a go and found I generally sent out tons of emails but rarely got any responses.
This probably means your emails sucked. Did you send a one-sentence email? Something like: "I saw your profile and you seemed interesting so I thought I would say hi." Where was your effort? If you want to meet someone, you need to demonstrate you are interested. Did you point out your similarities, common interests or things you both enjoy? You need to show that you aren't just some random guy spamming a hundred girls to see what will work. Does she have a cat or a dog? Even if you don't have one, you can mention that you used to, or you've wanted one, or ask how much the darn thing sheds. Just something showing it's personalized and, most importantly that you read her profile.
While I have met people online, I've definitely found my chances are significantly higher in person, face to face.
Again, that's probably because your emails sucked. There is no tone of voice, no body language or dimension to an email, so you have to do it all with words. This isn't easy, and a lot of people suck at it because they've never had any practice. However, most people (although not all) have a lot of practice interacting with people in real life - even if it is just to order something from Starbucks - making them better at communicating in real life than in an email.
If I were to become single again, I would be back online right away. It's a fast way to find people who are interested in similar things, and to meet a lot of people that you wouldn't in your regular routine. (When was the last time you went to a coffee shop on the other side of town just to see if you could meet someone new?)
Re:Right matches for Slashdotter (Score:2, Insightful)
still angry that the goat turned you down?
Re:wait (Score:3, Insightful)
Sigh. Here is where most get it all wrong. It is not about *who* you are, or what you *have*, it is all about what you can *pretend* to be or have.
Acting is the game.
It holds not just for men, but for women as well.
If you can't act, well then you know what to do...
My wife and I met on Match.com, and about a year into the relationship we went back to look at our profiles for the number of mistruths. While we didn't really find complete lies, there were definitely a lot of half-truths and obvious attempts to hide certain things.
My profile won in the dishonest test by a wide margin. But my wife said she expected that since women are far pickier about non-physical traits than men are. Women have a harder time lying about things that will make men message them unless they post pictures from 5 years ago or something, but that will be immediately noticed.