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Techno Bra will alert Authorities 130

Posted by CowboyNeal from the what-will-they-think-of-next dept.
Wonko42 writes "This is really strange. A British inventor has apparently created a bra that monitors its wearer's heart rate and can tell when she is in danger. Using its built-in wireless phone, the techno-bra calls the police (or the wearer's boyfriend) and, using the built-in GPS locator, it relates the exact position of the wearer. Um...interesting....and there's more in the article. " Unfortunately, I couldn't find any pictures of it, but I wonder how stylish it may be.
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Techno Bra will alert Authorities More

Techno Bra will alert Authorities

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  • Re:Pictures (Score:1)

    by Anonymous Coward
    http://www.spiegel.de/panorama/ 0,1518,29296,00.html [spiegel.de]

  • Explosive Bolt Bras (Score:1)

    by Anonymous Coward
    I am very happy to see the envelope being pushed in bra technology. It helps to solve the needs of people in their everyday life.

    I feel it should be a matter of outmost importance to make bras geek friendly. Think about it, for years geeks have labored to make user interfaces easier on computers so any random person on the street can use one. After all, non-geeks don't put the hours in learning how to use computers, so simplicity is an important issue. On the other hand, geeks, such as myself, are met with anxiety and frustration when trying to figure out how to remove a bra from a willing partner in the dark, with no instructions or user manuals.

    I don't know about you, but I'll admit that I don't get to spend a lot of time with girls, for the obvious geeky reasons I won't elaborate. Pathetic as I am, even lightning strikes once a while for me, only to be defeated by the bra clasp. After minutes of helpless fumbling, my partner gives an exasperated sigh and undoes it herself, spoling the mood just a tad. I'm sure I'm speaking for quite a few people here when I make the case for geek-friendly bra interfaces. It's only fair, after all. We geeks make computers easier to use for non-geeks, and society returns the favor by making bras easier for geeks to remove.

    I have a proposal, and idea that I've been kicking around for some time. It's my idea, but if someone wants to build them I won't ask for any money, just the chance to see life improve for nerds everywhere. This is my gift to society.

    So here's my idea: In many situations which a lot of things are happening and quick, decisive action is needed, the military and NASA have designed mechanisms which gets things open and accessable in milliseconds. I am talkling about the explosive bolt. When a pilot in a fighter jet is in trouble, he doesn't fumble with latches or clasps, he pulls an emergency lever or pushes a button, and BLAM, explosive bolts pop open the canopy and propel the ejection seat to saftey. Even back in the Mercury days, an astronaut in trouble thumbed a switch to blow the hatch for quick exit. You won't see a complicated network of hooks and loops or twist-offs securing the Space Shuttle hatch. You push a button, BLAM!, the door is blown off for quick egress.

    In a swords-to-plowshares peace dividend, it's only natural to introduce this technology to female undergarments. In my new, hi tech bra, the front part will be the same as usual, providing important support functions vital to the comfort of women everywhere. The back strap, on the other hand, will have a few modifications in the name of progress.

    The back strap will have an interface just like a pilot might see on a multi-million dollar jet plane. The strap, for saftey reasons, will be colored in black and yellow honeybee caution stripes. In big bold letters, the legend, "CAUTION: EXPLOSIVE BOLTS!" will be on the bra strap to warn people to stay clear. The switch will be underneath a cover, as well as the explosive bolts proper.

    Perhaps the advantages of this new bra could be illustrated through a use case:

    Scenario: User is necking on couch with eager, willing female participant. Clothes are scattered all over the floor, but her bra is still attached to her body.

    User, realizing that the dim lighting conditions and relative inexperience prevents the opening of the clasp, decides to take advantage of the new explosive bolt technology on her bra.

    Reaching around to her back, user finds the trigger cover. Flipping the cover triggers the siren and engages the red warning light. SFX: "Bar-ROOOP! Bar-ROOOP! Warning! Bar-ROOOP!"

    The trigger, exposed, is pressed by the user. Immediately, the bolts fire and the bra is blown free, providing instant access to what it once covered. Due to the short time interval it took to remove the bra, no interruption took place and the romantic mood continues, unabated.

    This is how I think a lot of problems could be solved in this world, second to actually meeting more girls.

    Best regards-

    Derrick


  • Re:and questions from an actual male (Score:1)

    by Anonymous Coward
    You have a wife and you're asking at /. why
    women wear bras? Okies. Sounds about right.

    Lea, take a class. Learn self defense. It's
    fun and will get you in shape, too. Carry some
    type of self protection if you feel a need. Since
    I've never worn a wonder bra, I can't imagine how
    it must feel to have to walk around with your
    tits smashed up and together all day long. Some
    of us females are waiting for the Wonder Jock.
    You know, tit for tat? Maybe I'll use my big
    boobs to entice some poor geek into designing
    something that would make this area of the
    male anatomy, when lacking, seem more interesting, fuller, more body.
    Firmer, more shape. Yeah, I can see it now. :)
    What about the male version of this bra monitor.
    LOL I can't type that w/out laughing. How about
    a JockTalk, giving the same information to his
    worried coworkers and girlfriend as he traipses
    through Berkeley late at night. Talk to me, baby.

    Would you really wear this as anything more than
    a fun romp for your SO? Would you WANT anyone
    monitoring your every move? If so, we're from
    different planets. :) No harm. I'm just waiting
    for the mothership.

    And by the way, I can't speak for women everywhere, but wearing a thin bra is much more
    comfortable when you have something to fill it
    with. Going without can get um, burdensome. Plus, they're sexy. Think
    about it, Mr. Married Man.

  • Re:False alarms? (Score:1)

    by Anonymous Coward
    If there's no increase in heart-rate prior to intercourse, you're doing something wrong. Like, for instance,
    necrophilia.

  • 10 nice things about a GPS/cellphone in your bra ! (Score:4)

    by Anonymous Coward on Friday July 02, 1999 @04:04AM (#1821638)
    10. It monitors your heartrate and if you get excited it phones your boyfriend.
    9. If you havn't got a boyfriend it phones a muscular policeman.
    8. If the police are busy servicing other girls it phones an escortcompany.
    7. You can set the dialtone to vibration.
    6. The gel-like substance is really nice for sensitive nipples.
    5. You can post comments on slashdot like this on slashdot by just connecting to laptop and fiddling with your beasts.
    4. Using the GPS and a log function you can backtrack and find all your clothes from last night.
    3. If your boyfriend is a geek, maybe this techno-bra will cause him to play less with his computers and more with your tits.
    2. Gives a new meaning to the term "silicon valley".
    1. You can get it for free if you are a long legged 36DD blonde and agree to provide advertisment space.
  • Posted by DonR:

    "If Man had invested a tenth of what what he's invested into the female breast into the space program, we'd all be living on Mars by now"

    I forget who said it, but it seems oddly appropriate.



    ---
    Donald Roeber
  • I think we need a Godwin's Law Version 2.0: Any on-line debate, in whatever forum (usenet, slashdot, whatever), eventually turns into a debate about gun control, at which point all useful discussion is done and the thread is dead.
  • Comment removed based on user account deletion
  • >When are we going to see some statistics on some real life tests, and when is the male model going to come out?

    And do we call it the "Bro" or the "Manssiere"?
  • >...than the fact that the moment this thing gets onto the market, one of you lot will put Linux on it.

    Well I do know that I'd love to see a Beowulf cluster of these...;-)
  • Ummm, wouldn't the EMF radiation/cancer risk outweigh the benefits of having a bra that notifies the police of when your heart stops? Also, I wonder how comfortable that would be? (Not that I'll ever find out firsthand. :) )

  • potential life saver (Score:3)

    by Imabug ( 2259 ) on Friday July 02, 1999 @03:59AM (#1821645) Homepage Journal
    you know, something like this could be potentially more useful for detecting heart problems like heart attacks. it's been well established that heart related problems in women tend to get overlooked by doctors.

  • It's a serious health risk if the bra calls her boyfriend when I remove it, just think about it...
  • Oh my...

    I'm not sure whats worse, that Slashdot is turning to cheesy sex humor, or that I'm finding some of it so damn funny...

    Could be nice though, if I had a daughter, she's get one, and I'd definately take away world and group access to /dev/strap...
  • There actually are prototype devices for doing precisely that. I remember seeing one on Good Morning America a few months ago. They detect abnormal rhythms and can defibrulate (now, that's misspelled!) and aparently they've tested models that can report the emergency, for people with known risk of sudden heart failure.
  • No really! Many men could use some kind of online help with getting bras off. How great would that be.
  • Apparently the inventors have come up with a similar invention for men -- It's a pair of underpants that monitors your "heartbeat" to see when you get lucky. When you do, it immediately phones up 15 of your mates and brags to them about it.

    rOD.


    --
  • ... Can these be configured with Beowulf?

    (Imagine that.. Geek paradise... Combine a mega rc5des cracker and an orgy...)
  • if I wanted to wear this AND carry a can of mace, who would stop me?

    and, as a woman who lives in Berkeley much of the year, I would love one of these. it's not a deterrent, but a lot of people are surprised and mugged right outside my dorm, with police only a block away. this would be perfect for that.

    Lea
  • more than a Wonderbra, I'm sure!

    Lea
  • yes, but this can't be ANY worse than the Wonderbra.

    not to mention that when I'm in Berkeley, this would be something I would wear. At PARC, I'm not so worried about bein attacked (except by my robot :)

    Lea
  • my parents read that

    it's a good thing for me I'm over 18 and they can't yank me back home

    Lea
  • If there was ever an example of a story that deserved its very own icon, this is it. What a sight it'd be, along all the KDE icons, internet icons, Tux icons etc, if there was a perfectly shaped pair of front bits right there alongside. :-p~~~
  • Yep, can't wait for the OpenSource version of that...

  • Shouldn't it say somewhere...

    An exciting side benefit is that the new bra can make even Ally McBeal look like Dolly Parton.

    And "wear" do you mount the GPS antenna? 8^)

  • Dude, the nipples go *soft* when orgasm arrives. They are hard before, and immediately after.

    Check it out. You will see that I am right!

  • Wonder if it'll go off in times of, say, great passion.

    The cops could end up bursting in on a lot of people having sex! :)

    "Oh, I'm sorry, I've just had an orgasm..."

    :)


    Dodger
  • THIS would be good candidate for...you guessed it...a Beowulf cluster! *evil grin*
  • Nuff said. :-)

    (Big grin)
  • That's exactly what I was thinking. I am not sure if the designer gave that any thought. But you can bet that the people who are backing did and are gonna use that (subtly mind you) in their marketing.
  • Umm... How often do women have sex with their bra on?
  • ...or maybe administer a preventative shock.
  • Yeah... Pictures would be nice!!! Do you ever wonder why the Internet has such a bad reputation...
  • Because I need to work. I don't wear heels, I don't wear makeup. I don't wear pantyhose either. I wear comfortable clothes with the exception of my bra. I work in a business casual office. My clothes are presentable. I am quite sure that they would sic a femme from HR on me if I stopped wearing my bra. I don't know why this is. At my last place of employment I got a reprimand when I wore sandals with no hose. I had on an ankle length skirt, but apparently my bare toes were impeding productivity.

    I am not worried about not wearing a bra making my breasts sag; they are not the perky type anyway. When I was quite young, it was more comfortable to wear a bra than not, but since about age 20 the opposite is true.

    I knew a woman in college who stopped wearing a bra because she could not find one in her size. The comments that pple gave her were usually quite nasty, the comments they made behind her back were worse.
  • ....than the fact that the moment this thing gets onto the market, one of you lot will put Linux on it. (Who said Linux doesn't offer good support?!)


    Sorry, it's Facetious Friday here in Paris.
  • Would different cup sizes be regarded as forks in the code base, since they're not "user independent"? Would geeks get offended when women said the contents of these bras are proprietary? These are important issues. Perhaps the D cup distro would be from "Slackwear", Red Hat would become "Red Strap", FreeBSD would become "Three BreaSteD"...

    It's STILL Facetious Friday here in Paris.
  • Or hack it to call your pager when she shows symptoms of arousal, so you'll know whether you're getting anywhere.

    But then there's the V-Chip Bra, that dials her Mom's pager when she gets aroused... and her Dad's, should the bra come unfastened for any reason.

    Finally, there'll be the new alt.binaries.bra.telemetry, where script-kiddies post all their intercepted signals.

  • 11. If your roommates come home unexpectedly and catch you dressed up in ladies' lingerie, you can tell them that your doctor prescribed it.

  • What if the wearer is cheating on her boyfriend, heart rate increases, and alerts the authorities.

    Hehe. I'm getting a buncha these for my partner.
  • I see that there is a relationship between danger and heart-rate. But how can you figure out if someone with a certain heart-rate is in actual danger ? High heart-rates can mean a number of things. I wouldn't like to have the police at my front door everytime I show my girlfriend how much I love her. Or would this rather work on the principle of heart-rate 0==not good. What if it's taken off then ?


    Message on our company Intranet:
    "You have a sticker in your private area"

  • Try to come from behind her and take her boobs in your hands. GZZZZzzefse. AAAAAAAArgh. Sorry sweetheart i didn't knew you wanted to do that, are you ok? ;)


  • I don't see how one cedes ones right to defend oneself just by using this device. Is there something stopping you from using the techno-bra AND carrying a gun?

    Secondly, I don't agree with you that the device is "old-fashioned and sexist": (A) As much as it may hurt your average feminist to admit it, women are on average physically weaker than men, and thus, on average, less capable of defending themselves against attackers. This does NOT imply that all men are stronger than all women, and it does not imply that women are thus incapable of defending themselves - but it does remain a fact that on average a women will have a harder time. (B) You are assuming that a woman will only ever be attacked when alone, and by a single male of perhaps average strength. I don't know about the US of A, but here in crime-rife South Africa, women are often attacked and raped/killed by entire gangs of men (often even when the woman is walking with her boyfriend; the gang just kills him too.) Even a super-ultra-bodybuilding-kungfu-fighting-womanofth e90s-feminist would be helpless (without the techno-bra) in that situation.

    You also seem to indirectly imply that all women should carry guns, do body-building, and perhaps learn martial arts. Who says all women want to? Should they have to?
  • Well...I'm looking forward to seeing the cops bursting into a theater where an action or horror movie is shown, because someone weared this WonderBra.
  • But how can you figure out if someone with a certain heart-rate is in actual danger ?

    You can't -- until they take the companion "panic button" out of their purse and send in the distress signal that confirms the bra alert :-^) A better idea might be to monitor the EKG with the bra and look for signs of cardiac ischemia such as ST segment changes or T wave inversions.

  • Or maybe you could build the guns into the bra. Gives a whole new meaning to "snub-nosed 38s".

    Just ask Austin Powers about these smashing weapons. All's fair in love and war...

  • The Ultimate in Evading Personal Responsibility (Score:3)

    by Bob Uhl ( 30977 ) on Friday July 02, 1999 @05:28AM (#1821682)

    I recall seeing this in Wired and thinking that it's pretty ridiculous. The inventor is basically asking women to cede their right to protect themselves ('course, IIRC it's made in Britain; they've already ceded that right) and rely on a 'speedy' police response. Given that, at least in the US, the police do not have the responsibility to protect any one person (merely to do what they can, or something similar; this is a Good Thing(tm), since otherwise the families of murder victims could sue willy-nilly), this seems ill-founded at best and downright dangerous at worst.

    Which would you rather have were you a woman (I imagine that a few of us on Slashdot are; maybe they could reply): a techno bra, with a 5-30 minute response time; a can of mace, which is often ineffective against a hopped-up attacker and is often used against the wielder (they are very close-range weapons, and are fairly easy to wrest from one's grasp; or a handgun, which is fairly effective (very rarely need to shoot; the gun itself is a deterrent) and not commonly used against the wielder (due to the long-range covering effect of a gun, an attacker has difficulty getting in close enough to take it)? Personally, I would prefer the gun. But then I wnjoy guns. I would think, though, that anyone would prefer the can of mace or pepper spray to the techno-bra. Even of they are not terribly effective (esp. in wind, such as is common here in Denver), they have to be more effective than an absent police officer.

    I would guess, though, that the techno-bra has a single good purpose: it would still go off if the victim were surprised in some way (say a man approaches from behind and holds a knife--or a gun for that matter--to the throat or back). In that instance she cannot easily reach for a gun or can of spray. Even a personal alarm is not likely to be accessible. Still, the number of false alarms with this sort of thing would have to be tremendous.

    In addition to that, it seems unlikely that a woman would want to wear one of these things every day. Who lives or works in that threatening of an environment? Maybe it's very common and I just don't know.

    There is also the matter that it seems a bit old-fashioned and sexist: 'I'm just a poor helpless woman who cannot defend herself. Please save poor little ol' me you big strong policeman you!' I thought that we'd gotten past that as a society. Women are more than able enough to defend themselves; they don't need to rely on us men for that anymore. At least, not in cities and not with modern technology and versus crime.

  • I can hear it now - Go go gadget Titties!
  • Excercise > higher heart rate > false alarms ?

    Well, the article mentions that the device would look for a sudden change in heartrate. So long as you warm up first, exercise shouldn't be a problem.

    I'd worry more about false alarms from things like a woman noticing a big hairy spider on her arm. That is, things that might cause genuine fear for a second, but aren't threatening enough to warrant calling the police.
  • A late late late night movie flashed a clip of a big breasted belly dancer wearing an ornate bra. She bellied up to one patron and two fourty-fours fired from the nipples killing said patron dead. Is this the techno future of maidenhood will the iron maiden taken on a leathal cryto-neo-meaning?
  • I think this comment in and of itself proves what was said in "Revenge of the Nerds"

    "All jocks ever think about is sports, all we ever think about is sex." Sorry in advance if it was a misquote.

  • Seems to me that this whole idea is a pretty good example of people realsing a thing could be done and not paying too much attention to whether it actually makes sense.

    There's been a lot of intelligent thought in the threads about this idea and the more people have engaged with the practicalities, the clearer it's been that it's just daft.

    Satellite location on a personal, portable device - Yes.

    Pulse detectors which alert to danger - Yes.

    A bra which calls the police when the wearer becomes agitated or excited - For goodness sake.

    Of course, what do I know? I find bras about at easy to deal with as Active X (I can feel a list of similarities coming on which I shan't bother sharing).
  • >1 word: scissors

    Leatherman. The true tool of the Geek.
  • I think this is the ultimate in Ladies Geekwear.

    Does it run Linux? ;)
  • Really, that kind of excitement is quite a bit of a lower heart rate.

    Besides, you'd have to last at least half an hour for that to occur, and that might be a miracle in and of itself.

    ;-)
  • Well, we'd certainly find out who was sneaking into R movies while underage, wouldn't we?

    Of course, techie boyfriends would be a plus, since they'd learn how to disconnect the device, while dumb jocks would be the ones getting arrested. Provided the techies could get beyond exactly _what_ they were working on.

  • it must be good.

    After all, Nicole Kidman thinks she's not that attractive, according to a number of interviews.

    sigh ...
  • I'd love to help with the research, but I'm kind of distracted at the time that I could help with observing such reactions. Maybe if I got a WebCam ... NOT!
  • Really. Next time they won't just whoop our asses and burn the White House, they'll teach Al Gore how to become a comedian and George W. Bush what it means to serve in real combat.

    Canadians - the true, the proud, the really nice guys to invite to your next party ...

    Will in Seattle
    ok, so I'm a dual citizen and a spy\\\former member of the Canadian Armed Forces
  • If we spent one percent of what we, as a nation, spend on pornography, we could cure all forms of cancer and terraform Mars.

    Will in Seattle
  • Right?

    Don't worry, if she has your jeans, she'll hack it so that you think she doesn't control it.

    There are times like this that I don't envy my brother, who has twin girls ...

    Will in Seattle
  • Sheesh, only in America would the "logical choice" be a gun.

    And, in case you wondered, I've fired more automatic weapons than you ever will. And I still think it's a stupid choice - handguns are easy to use against the owner, but pepper spray will let you run and take him down so he can't.

    Duh.

    Will in Seattle
    sheesh
  • A fool and his gun are soon parted.
    I went to see South Park and only ....ed.

    ;-)
  • Oh, honey ... [ZAP] ...

    ... hmm, maybe if one is into S&M this might be considered a "feature", no?
  • Or maybe you could build the guns into the bra. Gives a whole new meaning to "snub-nosed 38s".
    /.
  • Ok, maybe I am stupid, but...

    Has anyone here actually ever seen liquid carbon dioxide? What I mean is, dry ice is carbon dioxide in its solid state - take a piece, and let it sit - does a puddle form around it of liquid CO2 like water from a normal ice cube? No. It changes into the gaseous CO2. Now I know, at some point, it has to change into the liquid form (before going to gas) - but how do you store such a liquid (which has such a small temp/pressure range for the liquid state)? Anyone know?

  • You just have to know what you are doing. ;)

    And while I, personally, wouldn't really want to carry around a gun, I've often wished that my SCA dagger was street-legal (damn laws against double-edged knives in this state ... *sigh*).

    Admittedly, I think that carrying around ANYthing without using your brains and staying alert to the world around you is a Bad Idea(tm). 'course, I used to drive my friends absolutely bonkers because I refused to wait for the escort cars at college. But the way I see that is this: I can stand around outside for 15 minutes and wait for the car to take me home, or I can walk home in the same 15 minutes. If I'm standing around waiting, the potential predator KNOWS I'm scared to walk home alone, and will use that against me. If I walk like I know where I'm going, it's that much less likely to be a problem. Admittedly, there is no perfect way to stay safe. But if something like the Techno-Bra gets more women to think they can go about their daily business without being afraid of the world around them (without thinking they don't have to be alert to potential problems), this is a good thing. :)

    However, I can think of all kinds of ways the Techno-Bra could get abused. Like Daddy Dearest making his little girl wear this on dates, so if she gets um, "excited," it will call him ... and not telling her how to turn it off. *grin* That could be, um, awkward. ;)

  • Friend of a friend who knows the designer said the bit about phoning the police started as a joke! It was originally only meant as fitness aid...
  • When are we going to see some statistics on some real life tests, and when is the male model going to come out? (*laughin*)

    I guess it isnt too far fetched, I mean hey, whatever blows your skirt up, or bra for this matter ;)

  • I just have to say that what you said was hilarious, both myself and my co-worker love the idea of the techno bra "slackwear" and "red strap" that is genius ;)

  • just like you clean any other peice of hardware, fsck.

    ;)

  • Crashes? hmm, that would depend on what OS it was running.

    Windows - You might get a "General Protection Fault" and have the men in blue knocking on your door. WHich you might just have to reboot. Or you might have to call to get better support (if the bra just istn cutting it for ya).

    Linux - I find it hard to believe that linux would crash, if it did then you could edit the source code or maybe switch to a better fitting distribution.

    =)


  • Pics would be good, but so would an ip address ;)

    So what is the cooling system used here? It must get pretty hot in there.

    And does this bring a new meaning to peak times? And user loads?

  • So if someone ported linux to the bra could you unstrap it remotely? something about umount /dev/strap ? And what about talking to other bras? I think this fits in that wearable computer category. Then again it would be kind of embarassing to file a complaint that someone invaded your privacy by hacking into your bra because you left open ports that were not all the way secure. You wouldnt get much support ;)

  • I'll bet it's no worse than useing underarm deodorant.
  • Actually, I don't think dry ice has a normally occurring liquid state. (hence "dry") I believe that carbon dioxide is an example of a substance that sublimates, which, if I remember my chemistry right, means that it goes directly between solid and gaseous forms wihtout passing through the liquid stage. I imagine it is *possible* to get liquid carbon dioxide, but I don't think it's a naturally occurring thing.

    I think what we want in this case is liquid nitrogen, rather than dry ice. Liquid N2 is great stuff. Dip in a raquetball, a flower, a mouse (no, I've not personally done the last), and it near-instatly becomes frozen solid (and fragile as glass). Which means that the sex offender monitors would spray the, ah, offending members with liquid nitrogen and then fire a bolt into the resulting chunk of ice....Smashing it cleanly into little pieces.
  • I, being a woman on slashdot, think that this is a decent idea. I was pretty surprised that the inventor had thought about so many +/-'s with this thing. If you read the whole article you would know that there is a "false alarm" turn off so that false alarms won't get reported. I would much rather have this than a stinkin gun which could get turned on me, or a can of mace on the same grounds. Besides I don't ever want to hurt anyone, as I don't want anyone to hurt me. This way I could have someone to help rather than having to resort to violence as was being brought to me. Just my thought on the subject.
  • A British inventor ... of course it was British . Whose else could come up with something like that?

    The best thing about the gadget is that it can probably be set to alert at lower heartbeats, thus alerting husbands or father when the woman gets excited ... Can you say chastity bra? Wasn't chastity belt a British invetion too?

    --Flam (It was the French Joke Day yesterday.)
  • What's next, a condom that goes off during increased stress levels?
  • Dear Anonymous Coward,

    Your post, entitled 10 nice things about a GPS/cellphone in your bra ! is obviously a ripoff of my continuing bad gag entitled, Top X things... (Patent Pending), which has been featured in such quality publications as The Backyard Poster, Playgeek, and Good Postkeeping.

    Unless you pull the post, issue a formal retraction, kiss my feet, and declare war on Canada for crimes against Guam, I shall be forced to pursue prompt legal action. My crack (smoking?) law team of Lye, Cheet, and Steel will be in touch shortly.

    Sincerely,

    Rim Rod III, Esquire
  • 1 word: scissors
  • not enough.
  • What is to stop false alarms from happening like getting scared by a mouse or sending police on a wild goose chase from someone who has a weird sence of hummor. When you think about it what would stop someone from takeing a dozen or so of these bra, one for each cop, find some way to set them off without wearing them, place them all over some town out in the middle of nowhere and commit some crime like robbing a bank? Since the most or all of the cops will be following the false alarms the robbers will have a chance of getting away. Now note this is a theory, but whats to say it couldn't happen.

    Also since they are thinking about makeing t-shirts with the same device that is in the bra and selling them as exercise monitor for people with heart problems. Would these shirts call the meds. if the person was having a heart attack or some other problem like that or would it simply tell the person wearing it there heart rate or what ever info. it gives.

    The third and finale question I have is what would happen if the bra got wet, would it simply short out or would it electrocute the person wearing it? And who would be held responsible for it? (^_^)
  • I wasn't thinking exactly along those lines, but I do see a great potential for false alarms.

    The point, obvoiusly, would be to wear this during times of questionable security, say while jogging alone, excercising alone, etc. Excercise > higher heart rate > false alarms ?
  • Most of the comments I've read have been along the lines of "oooh, I wanna see a picture!", or "will it go off when she has sex?" but as an actual woman (You mean females read slashdot? duuude) but I can tell you that most bras are uncomfortable enough as it is without gadgets stuffed in the padding, and that most women's clothes are designed not for comfort and practicality, but for tight and thin, and something like that would stick out like a sore thumb. (hard enough trying to keep straps from showing)

    Also, it seems nobody has considered the possible privacy issues. A bra that monitors your pulse rate and tells authorities exactly where you are? If authorities can intercept the signals, so can other people (stalkers, rapists, muggers, other undesirables). Would YOU want someone tracking your movement and pulse all the time? I wouldn't

  • Actually, if humankind would invest a tenth of what's been spent on the space program on breast cancer research, less people I know would be dying (or scared of dying).

    Or women's health care in general for that matter.
  • since alot of people would prefer not to carry
    guns, perhaps the bra could be rigged to discharge
    huge amounts of electricity to anyone "hugging" a person wearing the bra. of course, this would limit where the bra could be worn...
  • Most women (including me) don't want to deal with the comments from (sorry all you nice guys out there) leering men if they went out in public without a bra. And yes, it does happen, and no, we don't usually enjoy it. It's not being complimentary; it makes me feel uncomfortable and reduces me to a walking pair of breasts, not a person.

    My discomfort with this techno bra thing is that it would eventually get used for bad things, ie abusive partners/spouses using it to track down their wives who have left them, for example. I can see it happening: wife buys bra in case husband/boyfriend attacks her, and instead he finds a way to use it to track her location and attack her when she has taken it off. It's a major invasion of privacy.

    I know the the idea of a techno bra is funny, and I'm not without my sense of humour. But here's a question: regardless of purpose, how many men out there would be willing to wear something that could pinpoint your location? I'd rather take self-defense classes and take my chances with the bad guys.
  • I don't like guns, unless they are in computer games (where they can't actually kill ppl). Not to mention, most people either end up shooting themselves by accident, or their kids do.

    I used to carry mace, and the problem I noticed with weapons like that is that it gives you a false sense of protection. The best way to protect yourself is to try not to put yourself in dangerous situations. There is no other fullproof way.

    So, if someone knifes me with the techno bra on... the police are just going to whip around the corner and stop the guy? Well you see, I will already be dead so what is the point?

    The techno bra doesn't seem like a good idea to me for "protection" but I think it could have a great medical advantage for older people. If this thing monitors your heart rate, it could really save lives if the phone calls went back to your closest hospital.
  • I saw this bra last week - it's part of a post-graduate design show at the Royal College of Art in London - the show finished last sunday unfortunately, but there has been some lurid coverage in the brit tabloids. It seems the orginal concept was something that would help older women who have fallen over or passed out or whatever, but being the RCA (which has a bit of a poncy reputation) the designer gave it a make-over and turned it all glam, high tech and expensive.

    While I was there, she was modelling it for a TV channel, and yes she was cute and pretty, (but not as cute or pretty as me, with my long purple dreadlocks :P)


    Someone asked about how to wash it - the electronics are in a small button capsule in the middle of the front, and it's easily removeable for washing.

    What else? It came in various nice colours - orange, deep purple, blue, in a kind of satin-y fabric (no-doubt deeply modern and space age gee-whizzy.)

    I won't be buying one for myself, cos I'm a bloke and my tits aren't big enough, but my Japanese friendette adored it, mainly for the cool gear factor I suspect.

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