Google Patents Fooling Friends With Snooping, Chatbots 128
theodp writes "Google takes Scroogling to new heights with its just-patented Automated Generation of Suggestions for Personalized Reactions in a Social Network, which not only data mines "e-mail systems, SMS/MMS systems, micro blogging systems, social networks or other systems" to get the buzz on your social circle, but also uses the data it collects to make like ELIZA and formulate appropriate responses for you to send as if they were your own (e.g., 'Happy Birthday, Mom!). Wouldn't Turing be so proud! From the patent: 'In a third example, a friend, David, sends Alice public or private message of a particular but regularly encountered message type (e.g., "how are you doing?" a common way to greet someone in the United States). The suggestion generation module suggest a good set of reactions to David, for example, based on the professional profile of David from the social network indicating that David has changed employers. The suggestion generation module generates a reply message such as "Hey David, I am fine, You were in ABC corp. for 3 years and you recently moved to XYZ corp., how do you feel about the difference, enjoying your new workplace?" The content of this suggestion are based on 1) prior conversations between Alice and David, 2) previous messages sent by Alice to other friends and 3) messages (sent by other connections in Alice's friend circle to David) which are either publicly or privately accessible to Alice, or some combination of these. Thus, the suggestion generation module generates messages that are personalized based upon both the sender and recipient using information that is accessible (public or private) to the sender.' Looks like Facebook may not be the only one strip-mining human society!"
Think for yourself. (Score:2)
As with any business, you have to make the most of exploiting the useful things it does, and try your best to ignore the shit it tries to feed you, no matter how convenient it seems.
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My best friend has been trying to feed me all kinds of Christmas-y German shit recently. Thankyou for your advice.
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As with any business, you have to make the most of exploiting the useful things it does, and try your best to ignore the shit it tries to feed you, no matter how convenient it seems.
You have a profound lack of understanding of what Google does and what
Google plans to do.
The consequences of using Google for ANY of its services will be far-reaching and
quite beyond the control of the individual user to remedy.
There is only one intelligent choice for those of us who actually do grasp the
full ramifications of using Gmail, Google+, or Google search, and that is
to NOT USE ANY GOOGLE SERVICES, period.
( captcha = retain. )
As in " Google will retain everything it knows about you,
forever.
/
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The hell? (Score:5, Interesting)
If I received a text like that I'd know it was from a bot. I am fully aware I was in ABC corp for 3 years and I recently moved to XYZ corp, I don't need a reminder.
How about:
Hm, maybe I better patent bots that actually talk like a human?
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How's the new gig?
Hm, maybe I better patent bots that actually talk like a human who was born in the 70s?
FTFY ;) You should patent a system that can emulate various demographics..
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Hi, Qzukk, I am fine. You responded to a comment saying that you make better patent bots that actually talk like a human?. Do you plan on doing this in a way that would risk infringement on google's well-made copyrights?
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Do you plan on doing this in a way that would risk infringement on google's well-made copyrights?
Hi RandomUsername99. Did you know that you are in violation of Missouri statute 575.120, Washington RCW 9a.60.040, and many others, all felonies, for impersonating Qzukk? As well, you are also guilty of numerous other felonies regarding unauthorized access of a computer, and that these felonies also violate federal law as the crime occurred across state lines. You can expect a minimum sentence of 15 years and a fine of not less than $350,000.
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You must surely be a robot. I can tell by your grammar.
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This is certainly true. An Englishman's way of speaking absolutely classifies him. The moment he opens his mouth, he makes some other Englishman despise him. The Scotch and the Irish bring you close to tears. There even are places where English completely disappears; in America, they haven't spoken it for years.
Prior art. (Score:3)
My Slashdot Suggest Bot recommends attaching one or more of the following to a comment that has already achieved +5 insightful:
I for one welcome our new chatbot overlords!
This is why I don't have a Facebook account!
As if we need more evidence that software patents are broken!
I am a bot you insensitive clod!
Obligatory XKCD: http://xkcd.com/948/ [xkcd.com]
Obligatory XKCD: http://xkcd.com/632/ [xkcd.com]
Whatever happened to "Don't be evil?!"
In soviet Russia bot chats you!
This is awesome ! (Score:5, Insightful)
Maybe in the future we just have bots talking to each other, so I don't have to engage in actual conversation !
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I am interested in your ideas and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
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Yeah, this is great. Now you can have endless "conversations" with people you don't care enough about to actually keep up-to-date with, asking them questions you don't care the answer to.
Re:This is awesome ! (Score:5, Funny)
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Finally, a social network for me! (Score:5, Funny)
We just need a giant network of bots, seeded from real human interaction, to play this conversation game with each other. Then sell all of that "content" to advertisers which would echo back into the system, thereby making the advertisers think their products/services are desirable based on increased communication.
I would no longer be bored by real life social sharing, but would watch this network like the Game of Life!
Potential creepyness. (Score:5, Funny)
"Happy Birthday, Son!"
"Dad? You came back! I thought we'd lost you forever. Where are you now?"
"Any good presents?"
"Be serious. Six months since you left us, and now you ask about presents?"
Re:Potential creepyness. (Score:5, Funny)
"Dad, the family has been losing our shirts financially since you disappeared."
"Hey, that was a really cool picture you gmailed two days ago to to Susie Hopkins titled 'me without a shirt'. Do you still enjoy photography?"
Re:Potential creepyness. (Score:5, Funny)
"Happy Birthday, Son!"
"Thank you dad!"
"Any good presents?"
"Everything was fantastic!"
"I see you've been enjoying yourself."
"This will be the best year ever!"
During the birthday party, a candle fell from the cake and started a fire that killed the entire family.
That happened sixteen centuries ago. The automated social bots have had this same conversation every year since.
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There was a story I read a very long time ago, I forget the title (And probably misremember half of it, too), describing an automated house. A spotlessly clean house. The robots mowed the lawn. Each day they prepared food for the family, and took out the leftovers. The dogs were fed from an automated food dispenser. Robots swept the floors, and cleaned the windows. It's only towards the end of the description of this wonder-home that it becomes apparent there are no human occupants: They died many years ago
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As you started telling that story, and based on the context, I imagined the camera to moving away showing the spotless house with its perfect lawn and white picket fence, surrounded by charred devastation, on an asteroid, floating away from what seems to be the remains of Earth after a cataclysmic explosion.
Re:Potential creepyness. (Score:5, Informative)
Re:Potential creepyness. (Score:4, Informative)
This post generated by the Wikipedia reference bot.
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You forgot the shadows...burnout residue of the family. :)
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They did.
The dispenser just kept going.
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I remember reading that as a kid. Creeped me out when the burn marks are mentioned.
Taking this to the logical end (Score:1)
we'll end up with bots talking on our behalf to the recipients bot. It will be a conversation between bots. No communication will actually occur between humans.
Re:Taking this to the logical end (Score:5, Funny)
And then the bot pretending to be a 10 year old girl will have the bot pretending to be a creepy old man arrested by bots pretending to be the FBI.
Fortunately, a bot pretending to be a lawyer will pretend to defend it when it pretends to go to trial before a bot pretending to be a judge and a jury of twelve bots pretending to be its peers.
When it is all finished other bots will have something to pretend to talk about while pretending to chat for years to come.
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bot-nets of voice-bots (Score:1)
I'm going out right now and starting a 'think of the children' bot-net to automatically append their millions-strong voice to any child-bot conversation. It will surely drown out any reason-bots that may get involved.
Also, the end of the world will come when the Christian-bots will get into an internet-wide argument with Jew-bots, Islam-bots, and Spaghetti-bots.
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well they had to do this and not just write down "AI secretaries". even the patent office buffoons might have scoffed at that!
but yes, that would be quite nice actually if mundane communications would be automated like christmas cards to business people you knew 10 years ago but don't give a shit about, paying bills etc shit, reminding you of things you need to do and doing those that don't need an "executive decision"(and not paying fishing expedition bills you don't need to pay). the obvious problem with
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well they had to do this and not just write down "AI secretaries". even the patent office buffoons might have scoffed at that!
but yes, that would be quite nice actually if mundane communications would be automated like christmas cards to business people you knew 10 years ago but don't give a shit about, paying bills etc shit, reminding you of things you need to do and doing those that don't need an "executive decision"(and not paying fishing expedition bills you don't need to pay).
To a limited (but growing) extent, things like Google Now already do this.
I'm reminded of birthdays, warned in advance if my commute is delayed, and offered restaurant suggestions if I linger downtown too long after work. Friday (the app) already has the person I'm most likely to call one-touch ready for me without me having to press the 1970's intercom on my desk and say, "Janet, can you please get my wife on the phone."
It can already text my wife when I leave the office without me doing anything -- and i
Sexting? (Score:1)
"Hello, Camile! It would very please me greatly if I could insert the portion of me unto you! Let us commence!"
Re:Sexting? (Score:5, Funny)
Camilebot and Starbot are now in a relationship.
Camilebot
I can't believe it's been 2^16 milliseconds already! I'm in automated heaven. Love you Starbot!
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"Hi Janet! I heard you like g-strings, and that your favorite color is red. There's a great sale going on at Victoria's Secret!"
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"Hi Jared! I heard you like g-strings, and that your favorite color is red. There's a great sale going on at Victoria's Secret!"
FTFY.
This is Slashdot, after all.
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"Hi Jared! I see you like two women and a cup and Firefly. Have you seen the sale at Think Geek for their new Firefly mugs?"
FTFY. :)
(Actually if we're doing slashdot we have to work goatse in there somewhere...)
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I advertise a sale on robes and wizard hats.
Beta-Level (Score:2)
Sign me up (Score:3)
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Why do you care about being polite and social to "annoying random people?" If they annoy you, tell them they annoy you. Why bother hiding behind feigned civility?
What's not to like?
How about actual human interaction?
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Yeah, WTF?! You need a bot to tell you what to say to people? Don't say anything. Shit, say hi. Hey, what's up? Oh yo, I can't talk now. Busy. Jesus, just use your brain and a couple fingers.
I saw this and straight away, lost any remaining respect I had for google.
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Relevant Sci-Fi reference (Score:1)
Black Mirror - Be Right Back
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Black_Mirror_episodes#Series_2
What's the marketable point? (Score:2)
I can understand Eliza like algorithms to make market-droids (CAUTION DROID IS TRADEMARKED BY WALT DISNEY STUDIOS AND LICENSED TO GOOGLE - YOU ARE FINED ONE DEMERIT FOR VIOLATION OF THE TRADE LANGUAGE CODE)
But how does scraping social media to target ads NOT come off as creepy to these guys and ultimately result in lost sales?
"Hi the_skywise, how are you doing since your father died? Did you ever think about trying DigEmDeep mortuary services?"
"How does it make you feel that Google should ESAD?"
Chatting with dead guys. (Score:4, Insightful)
Do we really want to completely isolate ourselves from even the most trivial human contact?
Re:Chatting with dead guys. (Score:4, Funny)
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Psst. Guess what? You won't care at all.
Facebook already does this (Score:4, Interesting)
*so and so* is waiting for you to see her timeline!
*person you barely know* recommends you add *someone else you barely know* as a friend.
etc etc.
Seems like this patent is just getting Google into the game so Facebook doesn't sue their asses off that is, unless they plan on using it to sue Facebook.
[deceased friend] wants you to see this! (Score:2)
And you have (1) message waiting from a pretty girl, too.
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Please elucidate. (Score:2)
(If you're going to make ELIZA comparisons, Google's chatbot has to say that when it needs more material to mine.)
This is a virtual greeting card (Score:5, Informative)
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"If you don't like the concept at all, you can turn it off."
Hm really? I am not using google, but you are. Can I 'turn it off' so that I will know if I get a message from you, you actually wrote it, you didnt just click ok on the bots suggestions? Can I 'turn it off' so it will quit snooping on me in anticipation of offering you a 'suggestion?'
And if not, just how am I supposed to effectively turn this off, short of blocking all communications that are touched through google and refusing delivery?
I think I saw this on Office Space (Score:2)
Bot vs. Bot (Score:5, Funny)
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If you've ever played around with conversing with Cleverbot (Google it ha ha!), an online AI that supposedly learns from its conversations, you'll find that "conversing" with humans, at least the sort it apparently meets on the internet, is turning it into a disturbed individual, or whatever.
Well with a name that sounds like a tool used by a meat packer, CleaverBot, who wouldn't be disturbed. Oh, wait... Clever like smart... same comment.
I don't care (Score:3)
But Google can make you think I do.
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I was just saying I want such suggestions (Score:1)
Some commenters seem to be missing the important point that it presents SUGGESTIONS - it doesn't send an automated reply as if it were from you.
The other day I ran into an acquaintance a I hadn't seen in a while. I had not kept in touch, and I don't remember what's going on in other people's lives, anyway, so I had no idea what to say. (Ie "sorry to hear about your mom" or "how do you like the new job?"). Had I heard any news about him and his family lately?
I remarked to my wife that it would be cool if I
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If this were the case, then people would simply lose the ability to jump-start conversations. These are valuable skills to have, actually.
If what were the case? Having assistance? I DO hav (Score:2)
"If this were the case" - if what were the case? If our devices helped us out in those awkward moments?
It is a valuable skill to have. Not all of us have it. Some of us are more skilled in relational calculus. A moment ago, a coworker stopped by my office. We have apparently worked together via email, but never met in person. I had NO idea what we worked on. When she said "thanks for all your help on that" I had no idea what she was talking about. An onscreen reminder of our last email or two would have
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A lot of people already either have very weak skills at "jump-starting conversations" or none at all -- it's one of the reasons shyness, social anxiety, and stress during the holidays are all so common. That's not even including people that are wired for different conversational patterns/approaches (e.g. autistics like me).
A simple one should suffice. (Score:3)
Program it to say "What?" and "Where's the tea?" Who'd know the difference?
INTJ (Score:2)
As an INTJ personality type, I applaud Google's attempt to automate human interaction. If they integrated this with Google Glass and I could automate pleasantries, I'd buy one.
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Ahem (Score:1)
Will I get paid for this?
SWEET!! (Score:1)
Hope Xbox live is a snooping source (Score:1)
This will be great. I'm hoping that Xbox-live and Real housewives of... are the source material for the general tone of messages. What could possibly go wrong.
Automate (Score:1)
Step 1 create a social network website.
Step 2 Now, just hook the suggested comments together.
Step 3 create a few billion user accounts.
Step 4 IPO based on a few billion users.
Step 5 profit.
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More specifically:
Step 1 create a social network website.
Step 2 Generate your fake user accounts by forcing the users of your other, actually used services to sign up.
Step 3 Send suggested comments to users to make it look like your social network is not the ghost town it really is.
Step 4 Still fail to kill Facebook.
Step 5 I guess you still profit, with your usual $10billion in revenue.
We see you scheming Google, but stepping up the fake popularity game is not going to win you the social network scene.
Opt out is not an option (Score:2)
Get out while you can.
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Strip mining (Score:2)
Google exists to strip-mine human society. It is the essence of their business model.
How in the Hell are they getting away with this? (Score:2)
Mod parent up (Score:2)
This seems to be the most accurate post on the topic, yet carries the lowest score. This is about making suggestions, not auto-sending messages.
Typing on a phone is annoying, so if I can say "on my way home" with fewer clicks, instead of having to retype the message all the time, I would be happy to do so. Of course, I could set up some kind of macro, but an automatic system is far easier for normal folks to use.
Of course, whether this should be patentable is an entirely different matter, but the feature