Facebook Abstainers Could Be Labeled Suspicious 625
bs0d3 writes "According to this article printed in tagesspiegel.de, not having a Facebook account could be the first sign that you are a mass murderer.(German) As examples they use Norwegian shooter Anders Breivik, who used MySpace instead of Facebook and the newer Aurora shooter who used adultfriendfinder instead of Facebook. They already consider those with Facebook accounts, who lack friends to be suspicious, but now they are suggesting that anyone who abstains from Facebook altogether may be even more suspicious."
Hogwash (Score:5, Funny)
I submit: https://www.facebook.com/dexter [facebook.com]
(OTOH, I unfriended the account because disappointingly it wasn't even a little bit in-character)
Re:Two words (Score:5, Funny)
I'm starting a compay that knocks people to the ground and puts a boot on their neck. My business model is to sell ads on the soles of the boots. Ticker symbol FY is available. W00t! Get the VCs on the line.
adultfriendfrinder (Score:5, Funny)
Yes, I am suspicious (Score:5, Funny)
You know who else never used Facebook? Hitler!
Found the next mass murderer on Facebook... (Score:5, Funny)
Phew! I'm safe! (Score:5, Funny)
I've had a Facebook account for years. I've even made one for each of the little voices in my head, too :)
LinkedIn (Score:5, Funny)
And I don't use FB, only LinkedIn - what does that make me? Potential murderer for hire?
Re:Hogwash (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Yes, I am suspicious (Score:5, Funny)
And Jesus. Mind you he was caught by the Roman Thought Police and, boy, were they cross.
Re:LinkedIn (Score:5, Funny)
Negative. I tried hiring some murderers through LinkedIn, and didn't get any applicants ... I'm pretty sure Craigslist will have a much better return ...
Today's dilbert is right on topic (Score:5, Funny)
Today's Dilbert is right on topic: SHHHH! It hears you. [dilbert.com] .
I don't like being packaged and sold as a commodity.
Re:adultfriendfrinder (Score:5, Funny)
Wait.. AdultFriendFinder is a real thing? I just assumed it was a thinly veiled front for prostitution.
You are incorrect. It is not thinly veiled.
Re:FB (Score:5, Funny)
On the other hand, LinkedIn's stock is way up from IPO, while Facebook's is quite a bit down, and pretty much nobody uses LinkedIn on purpose. So institutionalization isn't always bad.
Re:Two words (Score:5, Funny)
Breathing Human Beings Could Be Labeled as Suspicious
"According to this article printed in tagesspiegel.de, being a living mammal could be the first sign that you are a mass murderer.(German) As examples they use Norwegian shooter Anders Breivik, who is a homo sapien and the newer Aurora shooter who was also a person. They already consider those requiring life support as also suspicious, but now they are suggesting that anyone who is healthy altogether may be even more suspicious. While it is already established that places like hospitals and clinics are no good for zombies, the dead, and ghosts; the undead will have to take a back seat while more and more insane articles like this come out. This line of thinking could sure help morgue businesses."
Re:Two words (Score:5, Funny)
Future articles on this subject will probably include:
"Not On Facebook? You're Harming The Economy"
"$Nation Requires Facebook Account Before Issuing Passport"
"Terrorist Suspects Had Fake Facebook Account"
"Terrorist Suspects Had No Facebook Account"
"Terrorist Suspects Had Facebook Account"
Anyone remember the 90s when the advice was not to put your personal information on the internet?
Re:Two words (Score:5, Funny)
A facebook account of an adult with only two friends; both children... best hope the government doesn't find out.
Re:It's also evidence... (Score:5, Funny)
The Carrousel awaits you...
Re:Stupidity rules (Score:5, Funny)
Population problem: solved!
Re:LinkedIn (Score:5, Funny)
I'm pretty sure Craigslist will have a much better return ...
Ohhh.. you'll get applicants all right. Not what you are looking for though.
Try it. If you sell an "antique writing desk with hutch" it will get instantly translated into, "I'm desperate for vagina. Call or email me at all hours of the fucking night if you have vagina to sell me".
Craigslist should just renamed to questionablehookuplists.com
Adultfriendfinder instead of Facebook?! (Score:5, Funny)
Adultfriendfinder instead of Facebook?! Are those really considered to fulfill equivalent niches?
That's like saying 'He uses K-Y Lubricant instead of WD-40'.
Re:Overblown (Score:4, Funny)
You've already identified yourself as weird: you have friends who aren't like you
Or he could be a gay lieutenant that votes differently in each election.
Re:adultfriendfrinder (Score:4, Funny)
Obligatory XKCD [xkcd.com]
Re:Overblown (Score:4, Funny)
If that makes me a recluse, what should we call someone whose primary social interactions come in 140 character sound-bites and who doesn't spend much social time with others away from their PC?
A twit.