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The Almighty Buck Technology

World's First Smart Door Comes With Built-In Smart Lock and Video Doorbell (zdnet.com) 111

An anonymous reader quotes a report from ZDNet: First shown off at 2022 CES, the Masonite M-PWR comes with a built-in Ring video doorbell and Yale smart lock, plus motion-activated LED lights and a door sensor -- all powered by your home's electrical system so there are no batteries to replace. An onboard battery backup keeps the door operational for 24 hours in the event of a power loss. Both doorbell and lock components can be upgraded over time as technology advances. If you were hoping for an all-in-one app, however, you'll be disappointed. To use all the door's features, you need the Yale app, the Ring app, and the M-PWR app.

What's all this technology going to cost you? The fiberglass Masonite M-PWR starts at $4,000 -- and that's for the basic model. Several finishes/designs/glass options are available, with pricing on the higher-end versions reaching $7,000. If you consider that a decent front door, Ring doorbell, and Yale smart lock from the same retailer can be had for under $1,000, this is clearly a door for people who want the finer things. And that price doesn't include installation, something most homeowners can't do on their own as the door needs to be hard-wired. The door has been available in new construction homes since 2022, but this marks the first time you can buy it separately.

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World's First Smart Door Comes With Built-In Smart Lock and Video Doorbell

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  • Oooh! (Score:5, Insightful)

    by The-Ixian ( 168184 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @09:03AM (#63771718)

    Hopefully it is cloud connected, always on and requires a Facebook account to operate! /s

    Yet another solution in search of a problem...

    • by Anonymous Coward

      Hopefully it is cloud connected, always on and requires a Facebook account to operate!

      We will never know, since the link to the product [homedepot.com] is Access Denied.

      • by cruff ( 171569 )
        The link works for me.
    • The target customers for this product are:

      1 - People with too much money that have no idea what to do with it.

      2 - The TRENDY...sometimes combined with [1] above.

      3 - The paranoid / hyper-secure types that live in fear of the world around them...even if they do not live in a dangerous neighborhood.

      • Re: (Score:3, Insightful)

        by Anonymous Coward

        The paranoid / hyper-secure types would never install a door with an integrated window, especially a large one. It would be a steel door meant for industrial settings, with a steel frame, lagged into the foundation and the surrounding block construction walls.

        • by PPH ( 736903 )

          Yeah. This [youtube.com] is the kind of door they want.

        • The paranoid / hyper-secure types would never install a door with an integrated window, especially a large one. It would be a steel door meant for industrial settings, with a steel frame, lagged into the foundation and the surrounding block construction walls.

          Thank you.

          I was wondering if I'm the ONLY person in the world that does not want anything "smart" on my door or controlling my access to my home in general?

          • The parent poster is definitely not the only one displaying common sense. There is a lot of attention paid to smart doors/smart locks, but what I see, is that they seem to be something for the trendy. Like being able to wave your iPhone across it and get in.

            If someone -has- to have functionality of a "smart" lock, say they have an AirB&B [1], or letting maintenance people in, the best solution would be to have a secondary lock, so when someone doesn't have to allow people in, they can have real securi

            • by Anonymous Coward

              Smart doors/locks make a lot more sense in apartment dwellings, where the landlord already demands a key to your home within the lease contract, so having yet another avenue for someone that isn't you to enter your home is less of a concern.

              In fact, I installed a smart lock on an old apartment front door, just so that I could capture a log of when they entered my dwelling and get a push notification when it happened. They stopped doing it after I called them within 1 minute of the first offense and interrog

          • You are not the only person! I definitely don't want my door to control this!
          • I was wondering if I'm the ONLY person in the world that does not want anything "smart" on my door or controlling my access to my home in general?

            I would refuse a "smart door" simply because of maintenance. The door on my house has existed - and functioned - for as long as my house has existed. Somehow I doubt this smart door will last anywhere near that long... and, even if it doesn't break down, the "smart" features won't be supported for all those decades. Five or so years from now, you're gonna be stuck replacing the door.

            I will say another big red flag is that Ring doorbell. I don't want Amazon to have permanent access to my home.

          • I have a smart lock (zwave) for my front door. It's really convenient and easy to add / remove family members.

            I guess if a high tech robber wants to get within zwave range to hack my door, they can, but honestly, it would be easier to just kick the door in or go through one of the glass windows.

            The biggest security issue is that I have it auto-unlock when I arrive home. It's GPS based and doesn't unlock until a minute after I'm within home tange to reduce the amount of time from being within GPS range to wh

            • The biggest security issue is that I have it auto-unlock when I arrive home. It's GPS based and doesn't unlock until a minute after I'm within home tange to reduce the amount of time from being within GPS range to where I have visibility of the door.

              Again, I guess if someone wants to monitor my arriving habits on the off chance I have my door set to open using GPS, I guess they got me, but again, I would see them and there are easier ways to get into my house.

              I don't know how your system works...BUT, my

              • It's possible but unlikely. The delay eliminates that. And they would have to study me for a while to even know I had GPS enabled locks. The door doesn't open when I get there, the deadbolt just unlocks.

                If they are willing to putt that much effort into tracking and monitoring me, I think I'm toast either way.

      • 3 - The paranoid / hyper-secure types that live in fear of the world around them...even if they do not live in a dangerous neighborhood.

        You mean the stupid? As if a fiberglass door is gonna stop anyone. Like I'm going to be surprised to find a $4000 door STILL isn't screwed into the damn frame of the house. A $7000 door simply justifies bringing along the 12-guage to speed up the entry.

      • by Sloppy ( 14984 )

        The paranoid / hyper-secure types that live in fear

        That's a funny market to try to compete in, for hardware which is dependent on a proprietary cloud-based service. What's the very first thing which comes to mind when you hear "Ring?" That someone-who-isn't-the-owner is the entity ultimately in charge of who is allowed to access it.

        I guess the way to spin it is: if you buy a Ring, then you don't have to worry about the government constantly interrupting you with requests to see footage. Someone else will ha

        • Re: Oooh! (Score:4, Funny)

          by NagrothAgain ( 4130865 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @10:34AM (#63771978)
          Ya I'm not really concerned about the feds getting into my ring doorbell camera, if they want to sit around watching my neighbor's dog shit on my front lawn then more power to them I guess.
          • Then you can certainly be classified as someone with no paranoia. The reasons you should be concerned have little to do with you personally. They're more societal concerns.

            Imagine a city full of people with Ring-like doorbells and that the police have easy access to the footage. It would not be difficult to write software that would track a particular vehicle driving around town. Or to track specific pedestrians. It could be misused for anything from a police officer stalking visitors to his girlfriend's

      • The target customers for this product are:

        #2 isn't buying a $4k door because they don't have the available credit remaining on their credit cards.

        #3 owns whatever builder-grade door their house came with, and several thousand dollars worth of guns and ammo.

      • Re:Oooh! (Score:5, Insightful)

        by ctilsie242 ( 4841247 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @10:49AM (#63772030)

        The paranoid/hyper secure wouldn't be installing an electronic lock in the first place, especially after watching YouTube reviews.

        What would be nice is a lock that has one-way gearing to extend the bolt, for example, someone unknown walking up to the camera, but requires a key to retract it. That way, you can lock your doors from anywhere in the world, but unlocking requires a key.

        As for the key cylinder, there are a lot of companies using oddball Chinese cylinders. Who knows how good those are. The best cylinder to go with is Abloy PROTEC2... or at least Medeco4... something that at least good for the task. BiLock is also good.

        Instead of electronic junk, I wish Medeco sold their night latches which had a solid plate in front, and a 2-3mm insert to prevent drilling and prying. Simple and actually secure enough to resist a kick in. Or, instead of that, door makers offer five point locking mortise locks, where moving the lever up throws the bolts into the top and bottom of the door, then for the cylinder, use a screw in type, so one can use Best, Medeco, Abloy, anything that fits that. Most locks are secure looking, but they won't last long against someone going at them with an angle grinder, or their boot heel.

        For the prices of these multi-thousand dollar electronic locks, one can get a door installed with a decent mortise lock, perhaps multi-point deadbolts, and have actual security.

        • by ls671 ( 1122017 )

          The paranoid/hyper secure wouldn't be installing an electronic lock in the first place, especially after watching YouTube reviews.

          Especially this YouTube review:
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?... [youtube.com]

        • For the prices of these multi-thousand dollar electronic locks, one can get a door installed with a decent mortise lock, perhaps multi-point deadbolts, and have actual security.

          I don't think I would spend that much time worrying about the security of the lock considering my windows do not have bars on them.

    • Is there a "toll" option like in Ubik?

    • by AmiMoJo ( 196126 )

      Yet another solution in search of a problem...

      It addresses multiple needs.

      The doorbell lets you see who is at the door, and talk to them if you need to tell them you are going to be a few seconds. Maybe it's different where you are but the delivery drivers leave about 3 seconds after pressing the bell if the door doesn't open.

      It also lets you ignore people you don't want to talk to, without having to go to the door and look through the peep hole.

      The lock is useful for checking that you have remembered to lock the door when away from home. Even when you

      • by Junta ( 36770 )

        I would say the individual products are fine, but the "bundling" into a door seems superfluous, particularly since the door price is about 5x-6x as much as getting a comparable door and adding the "smart" devices after the fact.

        I *suppose* the promise of value is that the lock gets power from the house without *having* to swap/recharge batteries every couple of months, but that's a lot to spend for that little benefit.

        • by AmiMoJo ( 196126 )

          Yeah, it does seem unnecessary, especially as you will probably replace the lock before replacing the door.

          For power they should have a solar panel. Some CCTV cameras have solar for power now, although obviously with that they can't record all the time and rely on motion detection.

          • The odds are that most of the doors won't be on the right side of the building to get enough sunshine to make a solar panel effective.
    • Don't forget you get to throw it away when security updates are not supported anymore so that you can go get the latest model.

    • by dasunt ( 249686 )

      Hopefully it is cloud connected

      With the normal Yale smart locks, they will collect to Home Assistant and work just fine without the cloud.

      I doubt this is any different.

      I'm perfectly fine with smart locks - but I'm the sort of person who has left their garage door unlocked for a few days without one. At least this way, I can just have a door sensor on it and have it automatically lock if it is shut for a certain period of time.

      I think home automation has a place, but that place is as an enhancement t

    • by mjwx ( 966435 )

      Hopefully it is cloud connected, always on and requires a Facebook account to operate! /s

      Yet another solution in search of a problem...

      You forgot the yearly subscription.

      Also how much will it cost to replace when my neighbour backs his SUV into it. A decent composite door is already approaching £1000 without any fancy tech.

  • by RedK ( 112790 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @09:10AM (#63771742)

    Stop trying to connect objects to networks. Just turn the handle to open the door. It won't hurt.

    • by AmiMoJo ( 196126 )

      I'd like an internet connected lock that only allows me to see the state of the lock, and to lock it. No unlocking, it would use a solenoid set up to make it physically impossible.

      There is some small risk if I forget to lock the door and someone hacks the system to see that it is left open, but I'd be notified that it was unlocked as I left the house, and notified it it was opened when neither my family nor I were there, and I'd set up an auto-lock timeout of say 5 minutes as well.

    • The smarter the door, the dumber the owner...

    • Just turn the handle to open the door. It won't hurt.

      That part is still there and still works. It helps to understand what the thing does before you comment on it.

  • A convenient bundle might be nice enough, but it's absurd to command a 4X price premium. You can get a normal 'dumb door' and add, verbatim, the exact same gadgets to it with minimal effort because dumb doors are designed to have door knobs, deadbolts, and door bells installed, and all those smart devices are already designed to go in those holes, and it's really really easy.

    • A convenient bundle might be nice enough, but it's absurd to command a 4X price premium. You can get a normal 'dumb door' and add, verbatim, the exact same gadgets to it with minimal effort because dumb doors are designed to have door knobs, deadbolts, and door bells installed, and all those smart devices are already designed to go in those holes, and it's really really easy.

      Starting to wonder if those price tags include labor.

      Just got a quote to install one of those old-fashioned "dumb" doors. Fucking labor was 3x the price of the door. 75% of the total bill. And for a product they probably won't even secure to the frame of the house, and could be defeated with a solid kick. Delusional amounts of greed, and well worth it to DIY the damn job.

      • by Junta ( 36770 )

        The summary states:

        And that price doesn't include installation,

        So... yeah.... Good news is *maybe* the labor won't be 3x the price of *this* door?

        • The summary states:

          And that price doesn't include installation,

          So... yeah.... Good news is *maybe* the labor won't be 3x the price of *this* door?

          Requiring network configuration? I doubt it. Shit, the FCC and ISP fees alone...

  • All fine and dandy (Score:5, Interesting)

    by TuballoyThunder ( 534063 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @09:15AM (#63771760)
    Until the manufacturer stops providing firmware updates and then the inevitable API upgrade happens that breaks it. Or a litany of other failure modes.
    • Yep. I have a smart home, but every device was carefully chosen to be 100% functional on my local network. Some of them try to call home, and I block that at my firewall. Certainly no Alexa.

      I really wouldn't recommend adding these toys to your home unless you're up to learning exactly what they do, how they can fail, and building a system that will work in a way you will accept.

    • Miraculously the door will also store enormous amounts of PII, browsing, financial and medical history, DNA and imagery.
  • The only case for every door in my life today: Separate "out there" from "in here". No phone, no lights, no motor car.

  • No thanks. (Score:5, Interesting)

    by Qbertino ( 265505 ) <moiraNO@SPAMmodparlor.com> on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @09:19AM (#63771772)

    Computer expert here.

    Got _mechanical_ locks on everything important.
    I'm sure as hell not getting locked out of something because the power went out. Or some script-kiddie hacked some shitty IoT device.

    Got my "Germany Ticket" as a regular plastic card. Want to be able to use the tram even if my Smartphone runs dry.

    IoT is a fad, and a bad one at that. Alway has been. My toaster doesn't need a webserver and neither does yours.

    • One of my co-workers was able to open up their house in Reston, VA while on vacation in Costa Rica. There's an appeal there.

      • That line can readily change to "a script kiddie was able to open up one of my co-workers' house in Reston, VA while he was on vacation in Costa Rica."

        • by HBI ( 10338492 )

          Ok, but truth be told, do you think your mechanical locks are any real protection? They are a speed bump. You could argue the online locks are less speed bumpy if you know what you are doing, but putting the remote and the local together is an extra hoop to jump. Busting in the door or a window would probably be easier.

    • Re:No thanks. (Score:5, Informative)

      by AmiMoJo ( 196126 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @09:40AM (#63771844) Homepage Journal

      It's not like physical locks are difficult to open. If you watch The Lockpicking Lawyer on YouTube, you will quickly learn that most locks can be defeated by quick and easy low-skill attacks, using home made or very cheap tools.

      Often all it takes is shoving the tool in the right place and wiggling it a bit. Half the time it's faster to open it with the tool than the proper way.

      IoT is useful and can be secure if configured right. The problem is exactly the same as with consumer locks: most of the market is easily exploited crap. Just like the random IoT lightbulb you bought has crap software, the Masterlock you took off the shelf is insecure rubbish.

      • Re:No thanks. (Score:5, Informative)

        by echo123 ( 1266692 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @10:20AM (#63771940)
        Lockpicking Lawyer is one of the best YouTube channels! His explanations are eye-opening. What he does best is defeating lousy locks that claim to be secure, the more expensive the better. The door in TFA would make for a prime video.

        For example, the large glass doors used by grocery, big box, and strip mall stores. Lockpicking Lawyer shows how those doors are easily defeated [youtube.com].
        • by mjwx ( 966435 )

          Lockpicking Lawyer is one of the best YouTube channels! His explanations are eye-opening. What he does best is defeating lousy locks that claim to be secure, the more expensive the better. The door in TFA would make for a prime video.

          For example, the large glass doors used by grocery, big box, and strip mall stores. Lockpicking Lawyer shows how those doors are easily defeated [youtube.com].

          Not seen the Lockpicking Lawyer, but as someone who does a bit of locksport in their spare time (a fancy way of saying I like to fuck around with a set of picks) your degree of difficulty ramps up significantly as locks get more sophisticated. A simple padlock will be open in seconds (I.E one that you'd find on luggage or in a bike lock) a more complex lock like a car door or deadbolt is going to take more time, patience and skill.

          Of course any door security is just delaying, but often enough a high degr

      • by Viol8 ( 599362 )

        "It's not like physical locks are difficult to open"

        Well made and designed physical locks can be impossible to open in any viable time frame for a burglar. If they can't do it in a few mins they won't bother and will probably just smash and grab at that point anyway.

        • by AmiMoJo ( 196126 )

          But they will stand in front of your house, scanning for vulnerabilities on their laptop.

          Well, they might, given that they do exactly that when stealing cars. It all depends how worth while robbing your house appears to be.

          • Unless your house is in the middle of a forest I'm fairly sure someone would notice even at night.

            A house 2 doors down was burgled twice. Both times they smashed a window and were in and out in minutes apparently. Short of turning your house into a fortress your smart locks will do jack shit to prevent this sort of crime.

    • by serafean ( 4896143 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @09:44AM (#63771856)

      You live the joke (I do too):

      Tech Enthusiasts: Everything in my house is wired to the Internet of Things! I control it all from my smartphone! My smart-house is bluetooth enabled and I can give it voice commands via alexa! I love the future!
      Programmers / Engineers: The most recent piece of technology I own is a printer from 2004 and I keep a loaded gun ready to shoot it if it ever makes an unexpected noise.

    • ...My toaster doesn't need a webserver and neither does yours.

      The future generation, doesn't need to be that damn lazy.

      It's not the toaster demanding to be more in life. It's the human demanding to be less.

    • So long as the new functionality is (1) layered atop conventional functionality and (2) does not impinge on conventional functionality during any new failure cases, I actually appreciate the convenience afford by smart devices. Being able to turn off lights throughout the home from your bed, check whether you remembered to close the garage door, change your A/C to Away mode after you set out on vacation, and so on isn't strictly necessary, of course, but it's a layer of convenience that can bring a surprisi

    • IoT is a fad

      Unfortunately it's not. The only thing that is a fad is the name. The principles behind it have been around since the start of technology and automation and will continue to exist until our lives match those of the sci-fi movies we watch.

      For better or worse, regardless of your opinion on the dubious benefits or many downsides, it's coming and will be here to stay.

  • "The door refused to open. It said, 'Five cents, please.'"
  • battery backup and hardwired power needed?
    Does it have e-net as well?

  • by DeplorableCodeMonkey ( 4828467 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @09:26AM (#63771800)

    Though you won't remain king in your castle for long if you give others a remote control for your drawbridge...

    • Though you won't remain king in your castle for long if you give others a remote control for your drawbridge...

      Remote control is an easy delusion to sell if you put the remote in the kings hand first.

      People do these things first and foremost for their own benefit. Today's "king" is a narcissist who hardly cares about privacy anyway.

  • by HBI ( 10338492 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @09:32AM (#63771820)

    I bought no-name doors for my place, paid about $3k for each one. They were for a larger hole than a standard 36" door, but the price doesn't seem ridiculous.

    Call up Pella and ask them for a quote and see what they come back with. Ha.

  • Security level? (Score:4, Insightful)

    by bradley13 ( 1118935 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @09:33AM (#63771822) Homepage

    Information in TFA is thin. If this is a typical, flimsy door, with a single locking bolt and 2-3 screwed hinges, it's hardly worth the price.

    If it's a security door, break-in resistant, with strong hinges as well as locking bolts top, side and bottom? Then it might be worth the price.

    • It's kinda hard to tell from the information provided, but if there is a third party involved in the opening of your lock (which would be suggested if a phone app is involved) it's worthless as a security device either way, because that third party, not you, actually opens the door.

  • Soon HOA's are going to require everyone to buy these doors and give them access to both the camera and the locks. If not get charged fines.
    • Soon HOA's are going to require everyone to buy these doors and give them access to both the camera and the locks. If not get charged fines.

      Fuck HOA's.

      Thank God I've never had to live anywhere with one or deal with them.

      I still dunno how those damed things are legal...I mean, you BUY the land and home, it should be yours to do as you wish as long as it follows city codes, etc.

      If I had lottery money, I'd hire legal teams and try to get them defeated and thrown out.

      A pox on society.

      • Fuck HOA's.

        Unfortunately, they've become the norm: "According to the U.S. Census, 82% of newly built homes sold in 2021 were a part of a homeowners association."

        • Unfortunately, they've become the norm: "According to the U.S. Census, 82% of newly built homes sold in 2021 were a part of a homeowners association."

          I guess I'll stick to older neighborhoods and homes before the prevalence of the damned things (HOAs).

  • If you've got that much money to waste on a door, donate it to a women's shelter or something instead.

    Stop buying shit to fill the empty feeling you have in your heart. Because that's what you're doing, whether you are mature enough to admit to it to yourself or not.
    • I mean, if you downvote this, you basically admitting that you buy nonsense shit to quiet the feeling of emptiness in your life.

      "Oh no, a feeling! Quick, let's buy something useless and expensive to distract myself and get a brain chemical hit!"
  • there are no batteries to replace. An onboard battery backup keeps the door operational for 24 hours

    This means that if the onboard battery dies, you need to replace the whole door.

    Or that they are idiotic enough to state "This device is battery free. Except this battery".

    At least one of these, and possibly both are true.

  • This is all just a show. Those who are capable and brazen are undeterred by security measures.
    • Unfortunately yes. In the days of cordless/battery powered tools, it only takes a few seconds to cut through the wall with a sawzall and create your own entry point into the home/building.
  • by benjymouse ( 756774 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @11:02AM (#63772076)

    "Ghastly," continued Marvin, "it all is. Absolutely ghastly. Just don't even talk about it. Look at this door," he said, stepping through it. The irony circuits cut in to his voice modulator as he mimicked the style of the sales brochure. " 'All the doors in his spaceship have a cheerful and sunny disposition. It is their pleasure to open for "you, and their satisfaction to close again with the knowledge of a job well done.' "

    - Douglas Adams (HHGTTG)

  • A door for tech-illiterate rich folks who believe that paying way to much for trendy tech makes them look smart
    I wouldn't touch it with a barge pole

  • "Ring doorbell, and Yale smart lock from the same retailer can be had for under $1,000"

    Sure, if you just want to know who's out there, but if you want SECURITY, it's a joke on the Yale side.

  • Fragment from "Ubik" Philip K. Dick novel:
    The door refused to open. It said, "Five cents, please."
    He searched his pockets. No more coins; nothing. "I'll pay you tomorrow," he told the door. Again it remained locked tight. "What I pay you," he informed it, "is in the nature of a gratuity; I don't have to pay you."
    "I think otherwise," the door said. "Look in the purchase contract you signed when you bought this conapt."
    ...he found the contract. Sure enough; payment to his door for opening and shutti
  • by BigFire ( 13822 ) on Wednesday August 16, 2023 @12:26PM (#63772316)

    Reinventing fire is hard. Especially when there's really no good use for it.

  • This has been around since '78, It's just a rebranded SSC Mk-9000 Contiguous Space Connector.

    From their original promotional brochure:

    The Sirius Cybernetics Corporation are the galaxy's premiere manufacturers of computers, robots, lifts and other such essential, life-enhancing technologies...

    The corporation's 'Genuine People Personalities' make interacting with objects such as doors and teasmades a new and exciting adventure.,, Doors will always open politely, and it will be their pleasure to serve your entrance and exit needs

  • They also announced a partnership with Estwing Hammer. "Knobs are yesterday's way to open" said Mark Youngren, current president of Estwing. "Pounding nails and/or nail like buttons is the modern way to open doors. We plan to supply smart hammers to pound in the new Nail User Device Experience (NUDE) featured on these doors".

    "We're quite confident that in less than 10 years, everybody will be coming to their doors NUDE."

  • I cannot wait to see the lockpicking lawyer open this $4,000 door with a piece of dental floss and a pebble, and shortly thereafter have a group of hackers running doom on it. ;D

  • You're just hoping enough was thrown in by everyone else to let you pretend you did something here. Good luck with that.

  • If you want a smart door, get a regular dumb door. Then buy a smart deadbolt, and a smart doorbell. Then, if the deadbolt stops working, you can just replace the deadbolt. Or the doorbell. I would hate to have to replace the whole contraption just because one component went bad, or was no longer "secure."

  • ... need the Yale app, the Ring app, and the M-PWR app.

    I need to control them from one remote (via a standardized API) that can also direct a machine-gun-toting robot dog to attack porch pirates.

  • “All the doors in this spaceship have a cheerful and sunny disposition. It is their pleasure to open for you, and their satisfaction to close again with the knowledge of a job well done.” "Glad to be of Service!"

"Don't try to outweird me, three-eyes. I get stranger things than you free with my breakfast cereal." - Zaphod Beeblebrox in "Hithiker's Guide to the Galaxy"

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