A "Throne" Fit For a Tech King 111
WrongSizeGlass writes "PCWorld has an article on Kohler's new hi-tech toilet. The Numi comes complete with a detachable touch screen remote; motion-activated lid and seat; integrated air dryer; a heated seat; feet warmers; ambient lighting; built-in speakers with FM radio and an MP3 player input jack. If you have $6,300 to flush down the drain on a toilet this is for you."
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When I saw your subject line I was expecting to see something about a "Bowelwulf Cluster" of these...
Not up to the standards of Japan (Score:4, Informative)
Not up to the standards of an average high-tech toilet in Japan, but it's nice to see the US at least stepping up to toilet tech.
Re:Not up to the standards of Japan (Score:5, Insightful)
It actually is up that standard ... and Toto, the famed washlet makers are actually producing these in USA too ... you simply need to look them up.
I find it funny to see this coming over everywhere on the Intarwebz. At least Kohler knows their way up the social media / blogosphere / viral marketing.
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Integrating twitter into the sh_tter is not "innovation", it's spurious techbloat.
Not one of these features really has any value if you have a smartphone with you, which almost everyone does. Certainly everyone blowing $6000 on a toilet will.
Notch? (Score:4, Insightful)
Does the seat have a notch in the front? No? Back to the drawing board then.
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Don't need no notch. It's motion sensors raise the seat for you.
And by the way, the water is not only cold, but it's deep, too.
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Re:Notch? (Score:4, Insightful)
Actually, its to keep some lazy bastard from standing up and whizzing through the seat opening, leaving dribbles on the front edge for the next person to sit on. Notch or no notch, I've got to stuff Mr. Winkie down so as to miss either the seat or rim of the bowl beneath.
What I'd expect from a 'tech toilet' is Kinect (or some similar recognition capability) to detect a user approaching the bowl backwards (leave the seat down) or forwards (flip the seat up) or kneeling (activate face wash after the hurl is complete).....
...... Hmmm, off to the Patent Office!
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But that water is so cold. And deep, too.
detachable *touch* screen remote? (Score:2, Insightful)
Eww, I'm not touching that!
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It depends on what the last guy touched it with...
Question (Score:1)
Idiocracy (Score:2)
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Well apparently you're not the only one, but it doesn't look anything like a recliner or have a TV in front of it, so, no.
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does it support IPv6? (Score:5, Funny)
If it does not have its own "I" "P" address, I am not interested.
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This should help you: http://www.google.com/tisp/ [google.com]
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It supports IPv1 LTS (Pissing Person).
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ping and traceroute commands could come in handy, while port scanning may turn up interesting information....
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Don't forget to flush your buffers.
Linux? (Score:2)
Also, does it run on Linux?
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golden shower?
questions... Re:does it support IPv6? (Score:2)
How does it handle backups?
Does it support pipework neutrality?
Or pee-er to pee-er streaming?
Is it torrent-ready?
How long before someone connects it to twitter?
oops - too late: http://hackaday.com/2009/05/05/twittering-toilet/ [hackaday.com]
Toilet paper, AI rights. (Score:3)
A couple of questions.
1) Do these high-tech toilets mean you don't need any more toilet paper? Someone told me they spray a beam of water up where it's needed. Which I assume means it needs some kind of image recognition...
2) If an AI is sufficiently advanced as to be distinguished from a human, does it have a right to not stare at people's goatses?
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OK, I didn't look at the gallery, but I did look at the images on the homepage. Do they seriously expect people to buy these things, then install them in a corner of the living room, with no door, surrounded by huge bay windows with sweeping views of Los Angeles and no curtains??
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Even better than the gallery is the video. It shows how you can not only activate the bidet, but you can control the position, flow type (pulse, wave or oscillating), water temperature and dryer. You can even set presets for specific people in your house so all you have to do is choose which person you are and it takes it from there.
Now, if they could find a way to integrate all this into my recliner then I'm all over it.
Employee fun (Score:2)
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If an AI is sufficiently advanced as to be distinguished from a human, does it have a right to not stare at people's goatses?
Can you imagine being the QA for that AI? Or even the developer tasked with developing that AI?
"What do you do all day?"
"Oh, I find pictures of people taking shits and feed it to my AI".
"..."
To revive an old slashdot joke... (Score:3, Funny)
Does it keep logs?
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2011-04-18 10:25:35- Received data stream.
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Only if they measure up to the minimum published standards, otherwise, not.
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Better still, a twitter feed [penny-arcade.com]
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Of course, but like in all systems, the difficult part is getting the admins to poke around in the logs to figure out what is making them larger...
Coming back to the US? Slashvertisement. (Score:1)
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And is overall stupid.
mp3 player jack... what nimrod designed this? Bluetooth A2DP!
Finally what idiot would buy it, if you can afford a $6300 crapper, then you would already have whole house audio with an audio zone in the bathroom that has far better speakers than this toilet can.
heated footrest.. wtf? again you would already have a heated floor.
This thing is a non starter, anyone that can afford it already has better than what it can deliver already in their current bathroom.
Self Cleaning? (Score:2)
I didn't read TFA, but does this thing clean itself? I've seen many self cleaning toilet seats in public restrooms in Europe. You would think for $6300 you shouldn't have to clean a toilet ever again.
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Diet change (Score:2)
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Agreed. I don't sit on the toilet any longer than I have to, which works out to be a minute or two.
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This is just something else for an executive to put on his megayacht. It's like selling stuff to ricers. You've already sold them underbody lights, chrome door edging and stick-on fake hood vents, so now you have to invent something new to sell them - like stick-on canards or a rear bumper with fake venturi tunnels.
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E-Shitting finally literal ? (Score:2)
?
Buy stock in Preperation "H" (Score:2)
The budget electronic seats are perfectly fine. (Score:3, Interesting)
I used to laugh about the toilets that wash and dry you. I don't any longer. I went to do some work for a few weeks in Seoul, South Korea. Both the hotel and the place I worked had them. I tried them out, and found out what I had been missing all these years. The basic ones have these functions:
- Warm toilet seats - this really helps to get things moving in the morning
- Washing, front and back - say goodbye to skid marks.
- Drying
Anyway, I told my wife over Skype how wonderful they were, and she laughed at me. Then she came to visit me in Korea, tried them, and suddenly, it was a must have appliance for when I get back. Since the power in Korea is different from North America (220V with different type of plug), and the instructions were in Korea, I ended up ordering one that had the basics, as well as a remote control. It took me about 1.5 hours to install, but about an hour of that was poring over the entire manual to make sure I understood how to do it. The actual install took about 30 minutes.
We both enjoy using it, and we hardly ever use toilet paper anymore. Some people might be put off by drying time vs. wiping, but as I like to tell people: "What's your hurry? Bring a book."
Here is the really funny thing. My wife has gone viral with this info. She told her pottery group, the girls at the dentist, and countless others abut this. I have female relatives and friends visiting more now, some almost embarrassingly come over to "try out the toilet". Almost all of them are in the process of buying or attempting to convince their significant others to purchase one. I'm now the accidental "Toilet Tech", as I answer questions about purchasing and installation for them.
After they use it, I've received all kinds of comments like: "If I met a guy with one of these, I'd never leave", and many more in the same vein, I got to thinking that the average guy would do well to have one of these when they finally bring home the woman of their dreams. All things being equal, for some gals, the bathroom will be a deal breaker on whether they will spend the night. It just might be worth investing $400-$1000 on a Vorpal Toilet Seat.
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Thats just the bidet effect. Honestly once you have used one you will look at the toilet paper world as completely barbaric.
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I ended up ordering one that had the basics, as well as a remote control
If you need remote control in a toilet you are doing something wrong.
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I ended up ordering one that had the basics, as well as a remote control
If you need remote control in a toilet you are doing something wrong.
The remote is more convenient than the standard controls, which are located on the side of the seat, for a couple of reasons:
1. In order to use the side controls, you need to twist your body to look at it. The side controls show LEDs, which are actually kinda hard to see in bright bathroom light.
2. We men think we are just so accurate when we pee, up until the point you clean the toilet on a regular basis. Then you think things like "How did that get up there?". So if you like sticking your hand in yours or
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Speech (Score:2)
Does it says "your business is appreciated" in a robotic voice once you're done?
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No, but it says, "To help increase our quality and customer satisfaction, your 'call to the throne' will be monitored . . ."
Creepy high-tech voyeur toilet makers, indeed . . .
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Did you see the home page? (Score:3, Funny)
People in glass houses shouldn't show thrones.
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All the fun of your home pc, and convience too.... (Score:1)
The real question is, when will it have video conferencing/voip (no more will you have to get up and answer the phone when you're on the throne) and be able to run Tmost current multiplayer games (for people who are just too hardcore for loo breaks)
Not a new design, way overpriced (Score:2)
The Neorest 600 has been out for years with the same features and is over $2,000 cheaper.
OK, it doesn't have the MP3 player, but I think you'll still have change left after you buy one.
That's just the only one I know of, I'm sure there's other advanced toilets available.
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Geohot is already working on getting "Other OS" on it
Does it have ... (Score:2)
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It's a good idea, if only because otherwise people will just drop the paper towels on the floor.
But I just don't worry about it. The world is an absolutely filthy place, and as it happens we're up to the task of dealing with it without needing hand sanitizers and constant hand-washing. I know there's probably fecal coliforms on my toothbrush, but they're pretty much everywhere anyway. Same with every other kind of bacteria and virus. But I don't carefully wash my hands after gingerly touching the remote, ev
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It's not necessarily "fecal matter," as such, that's the problem. For countless viruses and bacterial infections, the fecal-oral route is the main vector of transmission. You shed pathogens through your digestive tract, and that's what's in your feces. It's not the digested food-sludge that makes you ill, it's the microbes from your body that come with it. So yes, everybody, wash your hands. You don't need Purel; soap is fine. If you don't have soap, water and vigorous rubbing is better than nothing. Rememb
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My wife works at a large retailer and is around thousands of people all day, touching everything in the store. The kid may be too sick to go to school, but that doesn't mean that mommy won't take them to the store all morning. You may be too sick to work, but you'll still go to her store to load up on cough syrup and comfort food. I'm at customer sites all day, including several large critical care hospitals. We're not careful about hand washing and she gets sick about once every other year, I'v
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For example, the trash can should be located within close proximity to the door. That way, you can wash your hands and use the paper towel to open the door prior to throwing the towel in the trash.
Unless you're talking about proximity to the stall door (and most stalls don't have sinks in them, so I assume you're not), you might want to rethink that. In cities with significant immigrant populations, this can be a problem. The reason is that a lot of immigrants from developing countries aren't accustomed to sewer systems that can accommodate paper of any kind. Thus, they wipe, then throw the paper in the trash. I've seen many restaurant restrooms with signs begging people not to do this, but it still
You've got to be yanking my chain (Score:2)
Or at least taking the piss!
I guess it's a neat idea if you're feeling flush.
But I still think it's a bit potty.
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Urine for a shock if you think you'll ever get mod points using puns
Nothing beats a Ferguson, the king of bowls! (Score:1)
Bud, sit down. Let me tell you the story of the Ferguson. Now these babies were made in Maine, you know, at the little Ferguson factory. It's the Stradivarius of toilets. And my Dad could play it like a violin.
Yup, I'll never forget the time my dad took me to Maine to visit the factory. I had to go to the bathroom. And I begged him to pull into a truck stop. He said no, wait until we get there! It'll be worth it! It was!
Good job... (Score:1)
No Poo-tooth? (Score:2)
No bluetooth or voice activated commands? How is this better than peeing on a tree?
open to hack? (Score:2)
does it blend? (Score:1)
FM radio? (Score:2)
with FM radio and an MP3 player input jack
Fail!
Seriously, it's about $5 worth of electronics for a USB port that accepts a flash stick. Get it right folks.
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detachable TOUCH screen remote
And by the way... yuck!
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Futurama covered this... (Score:1)
Motion-sensing lid? (Score:1)
A motion-sensing lid, huh? And I think it's hard to keep my two-year old from playing with the toilet *now*
The throne for a tech king (Score:1)
List of requirements for true geek's king throne:
0) Must be in a room full of monsters.
1) When looting while confused, must exchange gold for randomly generated throne room monster.
2) When sitting, should respond with "You feel very comfortable here" or should do one of the following:
________a) Grant a wish or increase your luck.
________b) Allow you to genocide something.
________c) Identify things in you are carrying.
________d) Make you feel much better by healing you completely, curing you from sick
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That's not even amusing. Kill yourself.
It's the only useful treatment for mental illness and unlike your boring paranoid "caps free" rants would actually accomplish something.
Do it on streaming video so your message will be heard. Post the link to 4chan and you may become a meme. Use a decent camera (you won't need your money for anything else) since grainy suicide footage is poor wank fodder.
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