Following FEMA's Zombie Preparedness Plan Could Land You On Terrorist List 527
colinneagle writes "As if warning a zombie apocalypse is imminent, FEMA hosted a webinar for its Citizen Corps encouraging emergency planners 'to use the threat of zombies — the flesh-hungry, walking dead — to encourage citizens to prepare for disasters.' The problem is many of those recommendations would have you do things that would flag you as a possible terrorist according to The DOJ's controversial 'Potential Indicators of Terrorist Activities' guidelines. From the article: 'Don't be silly by thinking you must actually break the law before cops deem you a potential threat and report you. Paying with cash comes under numerous "you might be a terrorist if" lists. Whatever you do, stocking up on non-perishable food as the feds advise should not include buying "meals ready to eat" since that, too, is potentially suspicious and means you might be a terrorist. "Suspicious activity" at military surplus stores includes making "bulk purchases" of "weatherproofed ammunition or match containers and meals ready to eat, as does suspicious purchasing of "night vision devices include night flashlights and gas masks."'"
Re:A Muslim guy should make this a stand up routin (Score:4, Informative)
You are messing up the delivery. It has to follow the format.
If you (insert joke here) , you might be a terrorist.
Re:Not suspicious (Score:5, Informative)
They're also very calorie dense; each MRE is about 2,000 calories. They're made for rangers toting 80# rucks 12 hours a day, not wannabes sitting in the living room.
MREs are OK for a few days, but after that they will mess with your internal plumbing too they are so loaded with preservatives.
You're much better off buying the semi-instant rice, noodles, and potatos at the grocery store, and paying attention to the nutrition information.
Re:Home of the scared (Score:5, Informative)
For future reference, if you ever have anyone claiming to be with law enforcement come to your door claiming they want to talk/look around, you tell them you want to see a warrant first. If they fail to produce a warrant, you can be assured that either A) they have no case and are on a phishing expedition, of which you are not required to hold the net, or B) they aren't really LEO's, but rather con artists trying to work you over.
Either way, if they fail to produce a warrant ("we just want to talk" is a popular diversionary tactic to trick you into volunteering information you have no legal obligation to give), politely inform them they are trespassing and request they remove themselves from the property before you call the real cops.
Oh, and this should all be done through a mail slot or chain-locked door - many LEO's are under the impression that if their entry into your home isn't physically barricaded, they can just waltz right in without explicit permission (they can't, unless you've got some blatantly illegal shit sitting out where they can see it).
Better safe than sodomized.
Re:Not suspicious (Score:4, Informative)
Most canned goods have a 3 year shelf live based and that time is based on a consistent taste and advertised nutritional valve. An MRE loses taste and nutitional value in the same manner and is also degrades with large temperature changes just as a canned good does.
This is an example from Hormel regarding their "use by date" from their FAQ at http://www.hormelfoods.com/faqs.aspx#can1 [hormelfoods.com]
What is the shelf life of a Hormel Foods product in an unopened can?
The processing techniques utilized by Hormel Foods makes the canned product safe for use indefinitely if the product seal remains intact, unbroken and securely attached to a can that has been well maintained. It is suggested that all canned products be stored in a cool and dry environment to keep the flavor adequately preserved. For maximum flavor it is recommended that the product be used within three years of the manufacturing date. After that period of time, the product is still safe to use however, the flavor gradually declines.
Re:Are you a human being? (Score:5, Informative)
How soon we forget:
-War of 1812
-Mexican American War
-First World Trade Center
-Oklahoma City
-More bombings, assassinations, and other acts of terrorism too numerous to list.
Re:Are you a human being? (Score:3, Informative)
Oh yea the war of 1812. When those 'peaceful' cannucks were able to get as far as washington dc and burn the white house(wasn't called that before the war.)
Re:Are you a human being? (Score:5, Informative)
When talking about the founding document of our country is enough to get you labeled as a possible "wrecker" then i think we can all agree the country has gone to shit.
Hate to tell you this, but that's not anything new. Unfortunately I can't recall the exact title of the book this story is from (something about the history of the First Amendment) -- it is from a published book with sources, but you'll just have to take my word on that. Or not, whatever.
Anyway, back during the height of the 'Red Scare', there was an IWW member (Industrial Workers of the World for anyone unfamiliar -- aka "wobblies") standing on a street corner doing nothing but publicly reading our own Declaration of Independence. After a few minutes, a police officer comes by and arrests him -- for doing nothing but publicly reading the US Declaration of Independence. Now, it just happened that he was doing this outside of an office building where the US Forest Service (IIRC) had some offices, and one of those workers happened to have his window open since it was a nice day out. This guy doesn't really sympathize with the IWW, but he sees this happening and is so outraged that he goes outside and picks up the reading where the other guy left off. And he got hauled off to jail as well.
So yea, reading the founding documents of our nation has been enough to get even government officials hauled off to jail for quite some time now, unfortunately....
Re:Are you a human being? (Score:5, Informative)
Even in Israel the chances of dying to a terrorist attack are 1-2 orders of magnitude smaller than the chances of dying by, say, car crash.
http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Terrorism/victims.html
125 dead since December 2005.
this is around 19 deaths/year average for this period.
car crashes kill around ~400/year average for this period.
Israel's population is ~7M.
and just like in the US, people are more afraid of terrorism than car crashes.
Disclaimer: I live in Israel.
Re:Are you a human being? (Score:5, Informative)
By my count from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terrorism_in_the_United_States#2000s [wikipedia.org] there were about 23 terrorism related deaths from 2000-2009, excluding 9/11 (which can be safely considered an outlier). That's 2.3 deaths/yr. If we do include 9/11, it's 302deaths/yr.
From http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr60/nvsr60_03.pdf [cdc.gov] (I know it's only one year, I don't have time to compile a decade of statistics - but removal of any single outlier statistic shouldn't impact the overall message) page 89+.
Things that have killed ~2-3 people a year include:
-Measles (2)
-Malaria (3)
-Shigellosis (shingles) and amebiasis (4)
-Scarlet fever and erysipelas (5)
Things that have killed ~300 people/yr or more:
-Bronchitis and Bronchiolitis or other acute unspecified lower respirator infection (272)
-Diseases of appendix (426)
-Hyperplasia of prostate (446)
-Tuberculosis (529)
-Infections of kidney (604)
-Bronchitis, chronic and unspecified (639)
-Meningitis (649)
-Pregnancy, childbirth and the puerperium (6-weeks postnatal) (960)
-Malnutrition (2,680)
Even if you play mad-scientist with the statistics and assume that there will be a 9/11 every single year (~3000 deaths), these still kill about as many or more people a year
-Influenza (2,918)
-Cholelithiasis and other disorders of gallbladder (3,300)
-Asthma (3,388)
-Accidental drowning and submersion (3,517)
-Other and unspecified events of undetermined intent and their sequelae (4,773)
-Atherosclerosis (7,377)
-Viral hepatitis (7,694)
-HIV disease (9,406)
Things that GP mentioned:
Obesity (no single statistic, but assume a fraction of the 600,000 death by cardiac diseases are from obesity)
Cancer (Malignant neoplasms - 567,628)
Car accident (Motor vehicle accident - 36,216)
Non-terrorism based plane crash (Water/air/space/unspecified accident - 1,782)
Somebody elses gun (Homicide by firearm - 11,493)
Their own gun (Accidental discharge of firearms - 554)
Alcohol (24,518)
Stress (again, no single stat - assume a portion of Hypertensive heart disease (high blood pressure) with 33,157 death/yr)
I couldn't find stats for Dogs/Cats, Lack of healthcare (too vague) or Peanuts (although I did read several times an approximate rate of 150-200 deaths/yr from food allergens, a significant portion of which are from peanuts).
I know you weren't disagreeing with GP, but there you go.
Re:Not suspicious (Score:4, Informative)
Re:A Muslim guy should make this a stand up routin (Score:4, Informative)
Sorry I don't watch SNL. I like comedies.